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A HORSELESS TOWN. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
HORSELESS TOWN. At the doors of Indianapolis there is to be the first truly horseless city in America, and-save, perhaps, for those places where oxen,, goats, cam els, or what not else furnish native and locomotive power-the first horse less city of the world. The actual construction work is well under way, and in two or three years there will be a complete tewn. The horse that tries to enter, says the "Motor," will be turned back as sternly as motorists used to be from the strip on the Ocean Parkway in Brooklyn. The man with the motor car may enter free as air. It is planned t,o make this city, which is named Speedway, an indus trial city devoted to the interests of the motor-car trade.
Quite Lively Enough. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
Quite Lively Enough. Seated on an empty box in front of a log cabin in the Far West was a man cleaning a double-barrelled gun. A passing tourist stopped to chat, and asked him how far if was to the nearest neighbor's. "A trifle over two miles," he re plied. "As far as that? You must find it rather lonely here." "fto, I can't say as I do. You see, I mortgaged this claim for four hun dred dollars. And I couldn't pay, so they foreclosed." The stranger murmured an exclam ation of surprise. "That was two years ago, and the sheriff has been trying to get posses sion ever since. He comes twice a week, and we have a shot at each other; and at least twice a week some idiot comes along and wants to know if I ain't lonely; and then there are thieving tramps and rattlesnakes; so this life is about as exciting as I like. There comes the sheriff now. You had better lie down behind that log, and keep clear of his gun." The gold of life does not lie hidden in any mines: it sparkles in tiny sands al...
A Safe Prophecy. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
A Safe Prophecy. Little Bo-peep Hns lost hev sheep. And O, but she's sad without them; They'll turn up, I ween, In 1919 With a cold storage smell about them. A visitor one day mentioned to Vol taire that he had recently spent some time' with Albrecht von I-Ialler, the distinguished Swiss physiologist. "Ah," said Voltaire, "he is a great man, a great poet, a great naturalist. great, philosopher-a man of won derful accomplishments!" "What you say, monsieur," the visi tor said, "is all the more creditable to you, inasmuch as von Haller does not do you the same justice." "Alas!" replied Voltaire, with a grim smile. "Very likely we are both mistaken!"
A RUSSIAN WEDDING. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
RUSSIAN WEDDING. A Russian wedding is described by a traveller who was one ol' the invited guests. It was to take place at 8 p.m., but the bride, of course, was late. Instead of arriving at eight o'clock, it was nearly nine before she made her appearance. She was pre ceded by her nephew, a little boy five years old, holding an image of "Our Lord." The child gave this to the priest, and then the service began. Neither organ nor any musical in strument is allowed in the Russian Church, so the choir, consisting of five men, chanted. The priest alter nately read and the choir chanting went on for about half an hour. The priest then addressed several words to the bride and bridegroom. Two gentlemen, "garcons d'honneur," or groomsmen, stepped forward and were each given a crown, which they were to hold over the bride and bride groom's head until the end of the service. The priest then put a wedding-ring on the third finger of the right hand of each, and the chanting went on as before. The...
The Mew Woman's Quandary [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
The Mew Woman's Quandary "Yes." the now woTnfi.ii remarked. \ "! :!iri greatly troubled." i "By what.?" j "Well, I want !.o get married just j to pro'-'/.' thai J can, anf] I don't: \v;>i; 1 | to get married just to pro-'o that I \ don't, need to. If I don't., they'll say j I can't,: if I do. they'll say I have no j more independence t.han any other j woman." j Secretary Bryan, at a luncheon in Washington, said of a man who, through modesty, had declined an im portant and useful office: "So he wants to hide his light un der a bushel, eh? Then perhaps the country is just as well off with ut his services. When a man talks of hiding his light under a bushel, I usually ? think that a thimble wcxuld answer the purpose just as well."
ONE OF THE GREATEST MYSTERIES OF HISTORY. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
ONE OF THE GREATEST MYSTERIES OF HISTORY. lu the ye£? 1828 there appeared in the streets of Nuremburg ;i youth who could apparently not oven stand se curely. Upon his person a card was found, stating that:, owing to certain directions, he had boon kept since his birth in absolute seclusion, never seeing anyone or being (aught any thing. Gradually the boy was taught, to read and write, though, till his dis covery, he could not speak a word ex cept to say his name, "Kasper Mau ser," which he had been taught to re peat like a parrot; nor did he know the name of a single object. By de grees he related that he had spent all his life in a dark "hole," where he was fed by a. man every day, though he could not describe him, owing to the darkness in which he had always seen him. | At last Kasper Mauser was taken j in charge by an English nobleman - J Lord Stanhope-and educated to take the place of a clerk; but one day, while out walking, the young man, who was now about, twenty-one years old...
Head of the House. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
Head of the House. A man, accompanied by his wife, visit,od a tailor's to order, a suit of clothes. The couple differed as to the choice of material, and the man ner of making until the wife lost her temper. "Oh! well, please yourself," she said, turning away, "I suppose you are the one who will wear the clothes." "Wi.'ll," observed the husband meek ly. '"1 didn't suppose you'd want to wear the coat and waistcoat."
REMARKABLE SURGICAL FEAT. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
REMARKABLE SURGICAL FEAT. A remarkable operation has been performed in a hospital at Prague by Dr. Horak on a girl of sixteen named Marie Hubacek. She was suffering from a diseased bone in her right arm, and was sent to Prague to have the arm amputated. Dr. Horak, however, .decided to replace the diseased part .of the bone by a corresponding part taken from a dead person immediate ly after death. For his purpose he liitilised a girl who died in hospital from a bullet wound in the temple. The dead girl's right arm was ampu tated and part of it used to replace the diseased portion which had been removed from the girl Hubacek's arm. The operation was so successful that now Hubacek uses her right arm as well as before her illness. A good husband make.s a good wife.
Bit of a Mystery [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
I 1 Bit of a Mystery They wore seated beneath a tree ; in the park, and the moon was shin-, | ing to make one's thoughts turn to ! love. | Presently the girl said: "Oh, James, j dear, I can't understand why you lav- ' ish your affections on me above all the other girls in the world. Do tell i me why it is." j "Blowed if 1 know, Jenny," he re- 1 plied, "and all my pals say they're ; blowed if they can make it out; either." j
PRISON MASTERPIECES. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
PRISON MASTERPIECES. Byron's famous poem, "The Prison er of Chillon," is supposed to be writ ten by Bonnivard, the Genevan pa triot, whilst he was incarcerated in the ('hateau of Chillon, on the shores of the lake. But the poem was really written at lightning speed whilst Byron was imprisoned by inclement weather for a night and a day in the neighborhood. Nevertheless, some notable literary achievements have been really writ ten in gaol, undoubtedly the most out standing being two of the world's greatest classics, "The Adventures of Don Quixote" and "The Pilgrim's Pro gress." If only those two books had belonged to the literature of captivity they would have been sufficient to make that literature distinguished and immortal. Thomas Cooper, the Chartist, whose life reads like a romance, and whose name is held in reverence by modern reformers, wrote a remarkable poem whilst ho was lying in prison on ac count of his political agitation. This poem bears the remarkable title of "The Purg...
Sure to Suit Him. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
Sure to Suit Him. I In was no advocate for race sui- j dde, being the father of seven daugh- ; ton;, fiini hia face lightened with a ; great joy when Miev told him that a j .suitor was in the parlor (/ilking to i the girls. | "What in hie-; business?" he ar;!ced, ' r':M:ing his hands nervously. ! '"A wine merc'iant," the mother an- ' Kivnrtyl. "A wine merchant? (leaven be i praii^44" thf -r-^iijor cried. "He will "1»n r,iir&lt;> to prefer something old."
Sometimes It Is. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
Sometimes It Is. It was the.hour of Mic spelling les- j Hon, and the teacher was pronouncing j the words while the small persons in front of her laboriously wrote (hem down. According to the usual cus- ; torn, she called for volunteers to do- i fine each word as it was written \ down. I "Lunch," she said. "Now, who can j tell me what 'lunch' means?" i There was a long period of silence, ; then a hand went up. "Well, Johnny, you may tell us ! what lunch is." I "A lunch." said Johnny, "is what j you have for dinner when your father ; is away." j
THE ART OF DRESSING WELL. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
THE ART OF DRESSING WELL. The real art of dressing well does not lie in slavishly following the fash ion, tout in choosing styles and colora to suit oneself, and in this way em phasising one's (best points. A gown, however, simple, should foe chosen with due regard to one's own personality, hut to do this it is neces sary to spend more than one can afford. ?The great mistake so many women make in the matter of dress is in not pausing to consider whether the gown or hat they intend having will suit their own particular style of beauty. Because a hat or frock looks well upon your friend it does not follow that it will look equally well on you. Your coloring and figure may he dif ferent, and in that case the same dreso cannot suit you equally well. To be well dressed a. woman must be suitably dressed, and all the ac cessories, which make so great a dif ference to the effect, must be care fully chosen.
The Old Man and the Judge. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
f The Old Man and the Judge. In an Irish court recently an old man was called into the witness-box and, being infirm and just a little blind, he went too far in more than one sense. Instead oi' going up the stairs that led to the box, he mount ed those that led to the Bench. Sold the Judge, good-humoredly: "Is it a judge you want to be, my good man?" "Ah, sure, your honor," was the re ply, "I'm an ould man now, and mebbc it's all I'm fit for." The Judge had no ready retort. Hy being handled kindly, eoitr- soon become gentle, and are much more r-'uiiy handled when ihey become horses.
PARIS—A SYNONYM OF YOUTH. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
PARIS-A SYNONYM OF YOUTH. Paris when your skies are graying, how many of us know you? Do we know your Rue du Pont Neuf, with its silent melodrama under the dawning heavens-or do we know only the farce of your Montmartre? Do we see the laughter in dancing eyes in the Rue Mouffetard-or. in the revel of your Saturday night, do we see only the belladonna'd leer of the drabs in the Place Pigalle? Do we know the romance of your peoples-or the ro mance of your restaurateurs? Which? I wonder. Paris has changed. It isn't the Paris of other days, you say; and Paquer ette, littlo Easter daisy, little flower of France-little Paquerette is dead. And you are old now and married, and there are the children to look out for-they're at the school age - and life's quondam melody is full of rests and skies are not always as blue as once they were. And Paris, four thousand miles beyond Jthe seas Paris isn't what it used "to be! But Paris is. For Paris is not a city-it is Youth. And Youth never dies. To ...
One Horse Power. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
One Horse Power, A man was fixing his motor car. "Trouble?" asked a bystander. "Yes." was the laconic answer. "What power car is it?" "Forty-horse," came the answer. "What seems to be the matter with it?" "Well, from the way she acts, I j should say that thirty-nine of the horses were dead." - The ignorance of the masses on ar tistic matters is appalling (said Mr. Walter Ithnanuel, speaking at a dis cussion on "Execution in Literature and Painting" at the Authors' Club recently). He was passing through one exhi bition recently when he saw a group of persons. One of (hem said, "Is it a droring?" The reply was, "No, stupid, it's an itching." A third person interrupted and said, "No, vou are both wrong; it's a pas tille." Mr. Dustin did not approve of his son's choice of a wife, and was trying to persuade him io s e things as he did. "Yes, you are quite right, father," said the son. "Mabel has her defects, she is vain, full of pretensions and grand ideas, with a very difTicult char act...
A GREAT ENGINEERING WORK. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
A GREAT ENGINEERING WORK. The completion of the Los Angeles aqueduct, says the '"Scientific Ameri can," marks the successful ending of an arduous struggle with nature in its most rugged aspects of mountain and desert, and with powerful and subtle private interests for the pos session of a priceless supply of water. The ten aqueducts of ancient Rome were marvels of engineering skill and durability; but their construction stretched over a period of five cen turies, against the eight years that have elapsed since the Los Angeles aqueduct was first proposed, and the length and dimensions of the ancient Roman aqueducts bear no comparison with that of modern Los Angeles. The longest of the Roman aqueducts was 62 miles, while the Los Angeles aque duct is 254 miles in length, from the intake on Owens River to the city liinitB of Los Angeles. The irrigation aqueducts of the Inca Indians of an cient Peru, one of which was 360 miles long, are among the wonders of the world, especially so when ...
A Full Report. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
A Full Report. One day an eight-year-old girl, who | had been taught to report her mis deeds promptly, sought her mother with an aspect of grief, denoting great penitence. 'x broke a brick in the fireplace," the youngster explained, between sobs. "Well, that .isn't beyond remedy," smiled the parent, "but how on earth, child, did you do it?" "I was pounding it with father's ?watch."
CHARACTER IN YOUR THUMBS. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
CHARACTER IN YOUR THUMBS. Just as the chin gives qualities 10 the face, BO the thumb marks tne personality of the hand, and is an unerring index to a man's natural strength or weakness of character. The man with a long, straight thumb, square at the tip, possesses good mental capacity, and can al ways be relied upon to carry out successfully any work with which he I may be entrusted. His temperament is even and judicial; he is-a born | governor of men, overcomes difficul ties, carries himself with dignity, and by his ability to concentrate all his faculties upon the matter in hand, combined with his tenacity of pur pose, rapidly becomes a power among his fellows. If the thumbs be long, thick, and heavy at the tip, with the joints prom inent, a tyrannical and cruel nature is indicated, everything being viewed from an intensely selfish standpoint. A short, straight thumb shows ob stinacy and driving power. If very thick and heavy at the tip, a brutish, unreasoning disposition will be ...
Going Cheap. [Newspaper Article] — Lismore, Derrinallum and Cressy Advertiser — 22 April 1914
Going Cheap. 1 Some liine ago a man was a waken ed in the night to find his wife weep ing uncontrollably. "My darling!" lie exclaimed, "win*. i«.: t.litj matter?" "A dream!" she gasped. "1 haw lnid such a horrible dream." Her husband bogged her to teli ii to him, in order (hat he might. co;n j fort her. After long persuasion she was induced to say this:- ? "I thought I was walking down the Ktrcet, and I came to a warehouse where there was a large placard, 'Husbands for sale.' You could get beautiful ones for fifteen hundred pounds, or even for twelve hundred, and very nice-looking ones for 'i.s low as a hundred." The husband asked innocenlly: "Did you see any that looked like me?" The fsobs became strangling. "Dozens of them," gasped the "done up in bunches likp asjiara-^rs. and sold for ten shillings a bunch."