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FOLLY SHOTS. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 17 May 1884
FOLLY SHOTS, "Who are those men drinking at the table, papa?'" " They are temperance reformers." ' What are they drinking?" "'Beer." "Aren'~ they afraid it will intoxicate them?" "They don't appear to be." "What sort of beer is it?" "Billy M'Glory lager." The Rev. Adirondack Murray is altogether too reckless in uttering his curses on poverty. He ought to remember that their poverty is' the basis. of, the only hope that some men have of ever entering the kingdom of hea -ven. " How is it that you escaped arrest ?" said a friend to the "retired" president of a counitry bank. "There was the strongest circumstantial evidence that you profited by the defalcation of the cashier. S"Since it's all over I don't mind telling you;, was the answer. :" I never refused to make a loan to the Sheriff." The new cotton wadded liver pad has ad vantages wholly independent of those it was designed to afford. A young man who had been waltzing with a lady expressed the great satisfaction it gave him to dan...
The Gambler and his Coachman. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 17 May 1884
.iThm .Gambler :and his Coachman. 'A s'trange occurrence is said to have trans. piled at"Nice:France, which is very near to Monaco, theigreat gaming centre 'of Europe. A notorious;habitue;of the casino, who had made his money.principally there, had set up. an ,English 'vehicle, a pair of horses, " tiger " and' all, and cut''qiiite a swll"d lriv ing in the neighborhood.:- One day' he was riding:in the environsof the town upon the fine roads, when his servant, sitting upon 'the'raised' box beliind, who had been feeling sbmewhat uneasy at not receiving'his wages for some time, seeing his miaster!quite 'alone, ventured to ask him.through the' back win dow if he would not;make it convenient.to pay him. The master was in a good humor and asked : S'How much is:it La Fleur " " '" " One hundred and twenty-fivelivres, inma it pl'ease you monsieur." - "Very well, here it is,," said the master, spreading the sum in paper currency upon the seat of the vehicle' " Now, La Fleur, have you a pack of...
OUR ILLUSTRATION. MAJOR-GENERAL C. G. GORDON, C.B. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 17 May 1884
OUE ILLUSTRATION. MAJOR-GENERAL C. G. GORDON, C.B. The subject of our illustration this week, though he has seen very little fighting in con nection with the late troubles in the Soudan, is decidedly the hero of the day. Familiarly known as Chinese Gordon, from his able ,management of the war in that country many years since, and being well acquainted with the habits and customs of the Arabs, no one was surprised at his volunteering to perform the arduous and dangerous undertaking of penetrating the vast wilderness, and pushing through to Khartoum with merely a chest full of money, and a handful of followers. Our readers are made familiar from day to day with his perilous position, the outcome of which and his mission may at any mo. ment be solved.
EARLY RISING. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 17 May 1884
EARLY RISING. The proper time to rise is when sleep, properly so-called, ends. Dozing is not ad missable from any reasonable or health point of view. The brain falls into the state we call sleep, and the other organs of the body follow it.' True sleep is the aggregate of sleep. In other words, sleep, which must be a natural function-i.e., physiological in stead of pathological, or induced by disease or drugs-is a state which consists in the sleeping or rest of all the several parts of the organism. Sometimes one and at other times another part of the body as a whole may be the least fatigued, and so the first to wake, or the most exhausted, and there fore the most difficult to arouse. The secret of good sleep is-the physiological conditions of rest being established-to so work and weary the several parts of the organism as to give them a proportionally equal need of rest at the same moment. The cerebrum or mind-organ, the sense organs, the muscular system, and the viscera should be ...
Good Thoughts. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 17 May 1884
The world is a looking-glass, and gives back to every man the reflection of his own face, Frown at it and it will in turn look surly upon you; laugh at it and with it, and it is a jolly, kind companion; and so let all young persons take their choice. All men have their frailties, and whoever looks for a friend without imperfections will never find what he seeks. We love our. selves notwithstanding our faults, and we ought to love our friends in like manner. Contentment is a pearl of great price, and whoever procures it at the expense of ten thousand desires makes a wise and happy purchase. Men are never so ridiculous for their qualities they have as for those they affect to have. All censure of others is oblique praise of self. It is uttered in order to show how much the speaker can. bear., It has all the invidiousness of self-praise, and all the re proach of falsehood. Whenever you commend, add your reasons for doing so. It is this which distinguishees the approbation of a man of s...
ARCTIC EXPLORATION. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 17 May 1884
ARCTIC EXPLORATION. It is a misapprehension to suppose that the chief purpose of Arctic exploration is to reach the North Pole. The North Pole has figured in the schemes of scientific explorers only as a desirable incident in" the carrying out of their work. Geographers talk of the North Pole quest pure and simple as an un. scientific and a puerile idea. What explor ers are really expected to do is to advance as far as practicable into the unknown region to study for geography and make important scientific observations. Captain Nares, nine years ago, had to halt 400 miles this side of the pole. But his expedition was called a brilliant success, because he entered the great frozen sea north of this continent, ex plored the coast line for a distance of thirty. five degrees of longtitude, and brought Ihome a great mass of interesting scientific data. The leading geographers assert that Arctic exploration is of immense value to the world, both in its scientific and in its com. mercial a...
A MARKED MAN. BIRMINGHAM STORY. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 17 May 1884
A MARKED MAN. BIRMINGHAM STORY. "Keep your father indoors to-night, for he is a marked man." Such were the anony- mous contents of a letter which Barbara Brent held in her hand one cold frosty morn- ing in the dreary month of December some forty years ago. The note had been de- livered to her by the morning letter carrier, and contained nothing to show whence it had come, excepting the post-mark of Birm- ingham; but Barbaro knew full well the terrible import of those words. She knew they meant no less than the fearful fact that her father's life was to be attempted that day. To understand the cause of this desperate intention, the courteous reader must allow me to describe some events in the lives of Barbara Brent and her father which hap- pened prior to the December morning on which my story opens. Jacob Brent was what is termed a self- made man; he had risen from a very humble position in life to one of considerable in- fluence, and, though not a rich man, he was on a fair way to ...
OUR ILLUSTRATION. HASTINGS. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
OUR ILLUSTRATION. * HASTINGS. Hastings is by far the .most picturesquely ' situated watering place on the coast of Sussex: the "ing" termination making it, as 'one of the earliest Saxon settlements of the Haet."l ingas, whose name occurs in other English • couities. The arrival of the Conqueror is the first great event in its history, since when it continued in great repute for its ship' " building, for which the neighborhood of the' great Sussex forests afforded ample material, up till modern times. :As a port, however, it had not the early, importance, nor the wealth of Rye or. .Win, chelsea" and consequently escaped manyof , the French burnings to which they, wer, subjected. Like other townuson this coast, it gradially, declined, and h?bd becomde b ' mere fishing village towards the close'of the.last century, whlen a Dr: Baillie began to reciommeiid his patients to visit Hastings" Frcm that time it steadily increased, 'and St. Leonards, theti a small village inore than a mile dis...
SHOOTIST. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
SH00TIST.-Fowling pieces are now out of date ; the demni d is now for pieces that are not foul. " Please, sir," said the bell-boy to a Texas hotel clerk, " No. 40 says there ain't no towel in his room." Tell him to use oneone of the window-curtains." "He says, too, there ain't no pillers." " Tell him to put his coat and vest under his head." "And he wants a pitcher of water." " Suffering Cyrus ! but he's the worst kicker I ever saw in my life I Carry him up the horse-pail." "He wants to know if he can have a light." " Here, con found him I Give him this lantern, and ask him if he wanti the earth, and if he'll have it fried only on one side or turned over." 298
A Mahdi-aeval Puzzle; OR, PLEASE "RHYME"-MBER THE PROPHET. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
A M·ahdi-ival Puzzle; OR, PLEASE '" RHYME,"-MBER THE PROPHET. Colonials, in their errors hardy, Will persist in sayiig." Mardy ;" Others, thinking of his " bad eye," ,Always call the Arab." Mad-i ;" TWhilst the Eastern title, Cadi, Many-leads to speak of " Madi," Not a few, too, think that laddie Makes a fitting rhyme for "'Maddie." Better, though, than this is shady That's a " proper" rhyme for "1fMdy.' Though one man we've heard; said he, " What you ought to say's ' Ma-dee I' " One as well-might urge that pay-day Was a rhyming mate of " May-day." Long or short, though, neat or gaudy, " Mardy, ""Maddie," "Madi," " Mawdy," Whatsoe'er view we take of it, After all, where is the " Profit?'
Latest Foreign Intelligence. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
L: atest :Foreign Intelligence. PROM OUR OWIN' CORRESPONDENT. Annam has been offered by the Chinese `Government to any power that willexpel "the French. ThisPeki'z-t offer has not'yet been' accepted; as difficulties'vwould probably be experienced r':.&AInn?m-atini it. .,TheGovernor 'of 'the Philippiine islands' an iouncecs the death of the Sultan. of. Sooloo: The Siultan was :iot a particularly wealthy man, the :positidn' not being nearly Sooloo; crative as it used;to bB'. An avalan?he' has falleni at ':Alta, in 'Utah,' killing eleven peirsons. The snow is now ly ing sixty feet deep,: and there is, no iinm e-' diate prospect of an Alta-ration. -. Foot-and-mouth disease has made its ap pearance in Kaihsas. : The cattle-dealers Jhave had a mass meeting to ascertain if the aiutho rities Kansas-p'nd the irhiportation of un ;healthy beasts. The- atteinpt' 'to' blow up the Comte de: Paris is now generally believed to be a' honx orifumisterie. At any rate, there are very feid myste...
He and She. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
He and She. : A youth of pleasant countenance and form,. ,:,, While strollingon-ithe silent rook-bound S shore, ; :: . . '.: Was noticed by? maiden young and sweet, ,Who seemed: to be quite fair like--and more., :' He walked along with eyes cast shyly down,; And thought, perhaps, that he was there alone, ::. As here he turned some shining seaweed' o'er, ?. A.. nd there he' stooped to raise a heavy : stone. This maiden, fair and oung, ccosted him, ,And as she spoke he looked surprised, and c; blushed, - And seemed quite awkward, as his clumsy feet Through the white -and pretty sea.shells crushed.: She said:" Pray tell me, sir, why'thou art' sad, ?, And. why ?you seem in such 'a mournful' state ?" " Oh, maiden fair,"',' he? answered wvibl' a smile: ' "I'm getting worms to use for fishing bait." '
HUSH-MONEY. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
HUSH-rONEY: . Out of.the countless .variety of evil-doers wliho thrive.upon the misfortunes of their feiiow-dreatures, and 'are: enabled to gain a m~ahs:o f livelioibod by iie folly aniid:imidity ofjthei r?duies~)one 'class above~iall>thers seem to condict their depredations 1with much success, on account of the'defenceless position, of the unhappy individuals upon whom they prey. .We allude to those who make it their business to levy what is terme'd "hush-money." There are innumerable miscreants 'who thrive upon the possessisn of some discredit 'kble ee~rith nrfamily. skeleto, whiceh thiros A desolating: blight over many, a tife, rto ll appearance surrounded by every comfort and this description, secure in the helplessness of their victims, pursue with impunity their ,merciless..system..of. extortion,.being ..well. aware that the terror of exposure is; so great, that silence will be irch~?iked at any price. If'persons who are threatened by ruffiais of this kind 'with 'exposiire ...
HISTORY OF THE SEWING MACHINE. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
HISTORY OF THE SEWING': MACHINE. Forty-six years ago, on February 21, 1842, J. J. Greenough took out the first United States patent on a sewing machine, accord ing to the patent records as they now stand. Lye's machine was patented in 1826, but as the patent records of that year were burned it is not known what were its claims, The first sewing machine in the world;:intended rather for :embroidering than-plain sewing,' was patented in 1755. The next machines in order of time'were;.Thomas Saint's, English, 1790 ; Duncan's, English, 1804 ; the Rev. J. A. Dodge's, lAmerican, 1818, ,not' patented on account of 'the bitter opposition! of the tailors; Thimonnier's, French; 1830, and after some modifications was patented in the United Statesi in' 1850.' This was the first machiiie to come into practical use. ; Thimon nier was mobbed by, the tailors' and barely ;escaped lteing killed; He died inpoverty iii 1857. Then came Walter Hunt's, American; 1832. :He ieglected to patent his invention....
No Title [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
Afriend of ours once recommenided a tailor to us in the most glowing terms, so we gave him our ulster tore-seat, but we never got it back. The fellow.pawned it.., Our anger was fired. It was the garireht'that used to cover large deficiencies in other parts of our apparel, and we poured out the vials of our wrath on the friend who had thus deluded us. (We mean our friend.) " Well, my boy," said the friend, " he is not such a bad sort as you think he is, for he got my togs out of pawn with the money; that is why -' recommended him. You had better recommend some ,friend of yours to him, and then it won't be long before you get your ulster back."
Milk, Oh! [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
Milk, Oh I Mr. Jones, who intended taking his wife out for .a drive one day, asked his milkman,. who had a very spirited horse, for the loan of the same ; which request was granted. How ever, Mr. Jones is not a good driver, and had gi'at difficulty in managing the horse, which at last became ungovernable, and, to 'the horror of Mrs..Jones, bolted with them. M?r. Jones did not know what to do, and a serious accident seemed unavoidable; when;'all of a sudden,--Mr. Jones, remembering the capacity I5r which the horse was used, and calling tiut with a stentorian. voice, "Milk, oh 1 milk, oh !" the horse stopped instantly, to their great joy, at this familiar cry, and Mr. and Mrs. Jones got home safely,'without any further incident, save that when they re turned home in the eveninz, on passing a pump in the 'neighborhood, the horse 'would not stir an inch 'until Mr. Jones got 'down ihd worked the pump handle a dozen times, after which operation it' moved on directly ; and to finish off th...
BILL BROWN. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
BIL BROW#N.' ' B?~iE ILB S8NELL" (BAL* ARAT). :e was standing in the dooray f his'hut, " i!lng at a short pipEtill his iheeki almost met in his mouth. I walkeduiip and asked im' if lhe ?nera maniinamed William Smith round those parts. He remained silent for a while, during which time he took the pipe fromn his mouth and reflectiyely dugl his fin. `e ,inthe bodwl ther he kocked ithe ask dit, o tfl heellof hid .bobt, aind~haiided the remark that mebbe I hadn't such a thing as a pipe of tobacco on me. I had, and passed over a plug.T He seielt it'ind bent it' as though he vwas very. n nubtfnl ?stto its taiity, then started cutting clips off it with -an old.knife, saying at-the same time-; "Smithj l'me see ? 'Tweren't, Widow Smith, were it'? i"Dan Smith; 'as tkept; the rshaiity over thiere ? Sai Sinith, the horse dealer:?" Receiving. a negative -to these, ;h 'c6n tinued' ' : S':-l ikely you mean Brown,,: i; had a mater here named 'Bill Brown,. a sickly, little fellow, with a e?Hn',onhis ...
ONE OF WEBSTER'S STORIES. HOW A LAWSUIT WAS WON IN NEW HAMPSHIRE. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
ONE OF,;WEBSTER'S STORIES.. .HOW A`'LAWSUIT'WAS WON IN NEW S;,HAMPSHIRE., Daniel Webster was fond of p good story, and told a: few illustrating his: early lif`'in New, Hampshire. . One evening-, at a con vivial party, ,where hei and .. several?,dis tinguislhed lawyers ,were ;present,, the .con versation happened to;turn on the legal pro-. fession. '" When I wasa young practitioner, ' said Mr. Webster, "i there.was but one man at the New .Hampshire bar. of :whom I was afraid, aud that was old .Barnaby. .There were but few: men .wbo' dared; to enter.the list with him. On one occasion Barnaby was employed to defend a suit for: a piece of land. brought by a little; crabbed, .cunning lawyer called Bruce, , Bruce's case was looked upon as good as. lost when it was ascertained that -Barnaby: was: retained against him.. The suit came on for ,trial,- and:,Barnaby found, .that "Bruce had worked hard,. and left .no stone unturned: to gain the :victory. .The 'testimony for, the plaintiff was ve...
Statistics for Girls. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
Statistics for- Girls. A young English statistician, who was pay ing court to a lady, thought, to surprise her with his immense erudition. Producing. his note-book she thought he was about to indite a love sonnet, but was slightly taken aback on the following question : "How many meals a-day do you eat " '' Why three, of course; but of all the odd est questions !" ! 1Never mind, dear, I'll tell you all aboiut it in a moment." His pencil was rapidly at work. At last, clasping her slender waist : "Now,,my darling, I've got it, and if you wish to know. how much, has passed thiough) that adorable'little mouth in the last seven-, teen years I can give you the exact figures." " 'Goodness gracious I What can you, mean? ?. . " Now, just listen," says he, "and you wiill hear exactly what you have been obliged to absorb to maintain those charms which are, to make the happiness of my life." ' But I don't wrant to heair." " Ah, you are surprised no doubt, but ista tistics are wonderful things."...
HORSEBREAKER. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, ... — 24 May 1884
HO1SERBI ER.-k sadloss., Si.SCd6L f.y6ur., wife ,is ,as you say, we should imagine it's not only s'ually,.but it's" (s) cold weather; :f .. ' Why are: iy. g:is:bills so large.this. win 6ii':?" inquired a suburban citi7en. . The,sec rjtary of the company.;in the office when the question.was asked Jooked:over, the books a moment; and- replied?: "Your bill ,averages about thesar'in' s ;last' winter." " Yes, I know they ,do,' replied the householder, "and there I'mpuz led.:' :How so ?" queried the official.' V ,my iy :;l hid complany all last season, butthi wmtei she is married.!' eclanimed: tle!parent.i.. ' Surely," murmured the gas man, " somethinigiist be wronig wiith the uiete," '..