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Railway Time Table. TRAINS TO MELBOURNE. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Railway Time Table. TRAINS TO MELBOURNE. Pakenham 7.7 a.m., Officer 7.16, Beaconsfield 7.22, Berwrick 7.27, Narre Warren 7.32, Dandenong 7.45, Mel bourne 8,47. Pakenham 7.32 a.m., Officer 7.43, Beaconsfield 7.50, Berwick 8.0, Narre Warren 8.10, Dandenong 8.29, Mel bourne 9.40 Pakenham 11.54 a.m., Officer 12.3, Beaconsfield 12.10,. Berwick 12.16, Narre Warren 12.22, Dandenong 12.35 p.m., Melbourne 1.35. Pakenham 8.47 p.m.,. Officer 8.56, Beaconsfield 9.3, Berwick 9.9, Narre Warren 9.18, Dandenong 9.32, Mel bourne 10.31. Thursdays and Fridays - Pakenham 4.56 p.m., Officer 5.6, Beaconsfield 5.15, Berwick 5.22, Warre Warren 5.35, Dandenong 5.51, Melbourne 7.11. Saturdays - Pakenham 3.56 p.m., Omfficer 4.5, BeaconsfieId 4.13, Berwick 4.18, Dandenong 4.40, Melbourne 5.45. Sundays-Pakenham 7.9 p.m, Officer 7.22, Beaconsfield 7.31, Berwick 7.36, Dandenong 7.56, Melbourne 9.0.
Mornington Farmers' Society [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Mornington Farmers' Society The annual meeting of the Morning ton Farmers' Society is to be held at Berwick on Thursday afternoon next, when the following report and balance sheet will be submitted by the secre tary-: REPORT. We, your Officers and Committee, have pleasure in submitting to you our Report and Balance Sheet for the year 1916-17. The annual Show, held in Novem ber last, was a success, and although the Balance Sheet shows a loss of £1 Os 3d on the years operations, tihe sum of £~2 h:as beenll received since tile daLte of audit, giving a profit on the show of 19s 9d. Through the generosity of a few priza-winners at last show, who re turned their prize-money, your Com mittee has been enabled to donate £6 16s Gd to the Soldiers' Repatriation Fund. Your Committee desires to thank all who helped to make the show a success and also the auditors-Miessrs Twyford and MIcCann. BALANCE SHEET. Receipts. To Members' Subscriptions £83 3 6 Donations Cash £41 17 0 Donations Kind 5 1S 0 ...
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Home-made Hair Remedy That Promotes Growth and Restores Natural Color. This home-made hair restorer re moves dandruff, leaves the scalp clean and healthy, promotes growth of the hair, and restores its natural color, even though the hair has be come faded and grey. It is clean. wholesome, and may be used at any time with perfect safety.. Here's the recipe:-Procure I'oz. of Riejuveni Compound from the chemist, to which add loz. of Bay Rum. Shake well together; then add enough water to make lOoz. ('A pint) in all. A lit tie rubbed well into the roots of the hair every night will soon completely restore the natural color of the hair andi renew the growth where thin ness is showing. Almost every chemist has these simple ingredients in stock, or you can easily get them for you from the wholesalers. S. H. Henshall, Chemist, 246 Clar endon-street, South Melbourne. Coun try orders a specialty. All latest American, French and London Toilet Preparations stocked. Goods sent per return post, pac...
Nursery Rhyme Sermons "JACK SPRAT." [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Nursery Rhyme Sermons "JACK SPRAT." You will find my text. brethren. In the Book of Nursery Rhymes, oppo site a sweetly idyllic picture repre senting Jack Sprat at one side of the dinner-table. his wife at tile other, a smile upon thIeir rubicund counten tances, the last mnorsel upon their forks, and tile empty platter between. That picture. brethren, depicts all tile philosophy of matrimony. We are not told that Jack Sprat could, and (did, eat lean; that Ills wife could. and did,. eat fat. No, brethren. We are slimply told thlat the one "could eat no fat." the other "could cat no lean." Wrero my text to stop ltcre we might hastily Conclude tllhat the couple were eithler vegetarians or frnitarians, and that they lived on nuts, bananas, andl watercress. Ilut, brethron. my text dloes not stop here. Jack Sprat was no IHnm. hi:t wife no fat Frlau. 'They were both true-born Britons: thle platter, to e gin with, was well laden, to endt with. "clean." Thle one who could cat no fat ate all ...
Spoilt His Pleasure. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Spoilt His Pleasure. The young Scot never liked his mother-in-law, and this weighed heav ily on the mind of his wife, who was ill. Calling her husband to her bed side, she said to him: "Sandy. Inad, I'm verra Ill, and I think I'm aboot to dee., and before I dee I want you to gle me a promise." T'I' promise," replied Sandy, "What is it?" "Weel I ken that,when I dee I'll hse a fine funeral, and I want you to ride up in front in a carriage wi' me mither." "Weel," sadly responded Sandy, "I've gled ye my word an' it's nae me hat'll gang back on that, but I'll tell ye one thing, ye've spoilt the day for me." A little soot rubbed on to a greasy stove after frying potatoes or fish will make shorter work afterwardu of the business of polishing, and will eeon omile the bl?ackled.
Where Bill Had Been. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Where B111l Had Been. "Where 'ave I bin lately?" said Bill Basher to his friend. "Why, I could not get out o' acceptin' an invitation to spend, g couple o' weeks at one o' King George's 'otels. I was a standing outside a grocer's admirin' the jam, when a box fell dahn at me feet. I was a-pickin' of it up to take into the grocer when a circus came by. In the excitement o' the mo ment I follered it. "I looks dahn, an' sees the box un ,der me arm. 'Willyum, sez I, weot are you a-doin' wi' that box? Take It back at once like an 'onest man.' Jest then the grocer came round the corner wf' a copper. 'That's 'Im,' 'e sez. 'That's the man wot stole me soap. "'Stop,' sezs i. 'Do I look like a man wot'd steal soap?' 'Oowsomever, I was 'ad up afore the beak. 'Willy um Walker,' sea 'e, 'your appear ance is greatly in your favor,- but the circumstantinl evidence is too strong. Fourteen days.'" To freshen a shabby carpet, damn it, a small portion at a time, with a cloth wrung out in strongly-salte...
Certainly Not. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Certainly Not. A worthy Yorkshire canon, who had been greatly displeased by an act of disobedience perpetrated by one of his gardeners, sought an interview with the offender in order to repri mand him. Knowing that if he were able to avoid the interview until his master's wrath had abated he would come off with only a few mild words of cen sure, the man kept out of his way. A few days afterwards, however, when the storm was quite over, mas ter and man came face to face in one of the hothouses, and the canon ask ed: "Why have you avoided me in so pointed a manner of late, Johnson?" To which the gardener very wittily replied: "Now, I'll put it to you as a man, sir: would you, if you could help it, stand in front of a canon to be blown up?"
Then Silence Reigned. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Then Silence Reigned. He was glib of speech and good looking, and when did these ever fall to win when the wil.ning was a woman? The girl loved him with that foolish infatuation that passeth understand ing. The young man didn't do any thing. He- simply appeared on the scene. It was ever thus, wasn't it? In time stories came to her ears. and she told him how she disbelieved every one of them. They said he wouldn't pay his debts; but she knew better, for had she not divided her allowance with him for this purpose? "It is enough," he told her one day simply, "ff-you trust me." "I do, Reginald-I do, I do!" she murmured, as he enfolded her. "I do - do, do, DO! I will always trust you!" "Ah," he cried, Imprinting a chaste kiss upon her temple, "why-oh, why aren't you my landlady?"
Fond of His Pipe. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Fond of His Pipe. Mr. Ditchfield, in his entertaining book on "The Parish Clerk," tells a story of a Lincolnshire curate who was a great smoker, and who was accus tomed to retire to the vestry before the sermon and there smoke a pipe while the congregation sang a psalm. "One Sunday," says Mr. Ditchfleld, "he had an extra pipe, and Joshua (the clerk) told him that the people were getting impatient. "Let them sing another psalm," said the curate. "They have, sir," replied the clerk. "Then let them sing the hundred and nineteenth," replied the curate. At last he finished his pipe and be gn to put on the black gown, but its foldi were troublesome and he could not get it on. "I think the devil's in the gown," muttered the curate. , "I think he be," dryly replied old Joshua.
Yankee Humor. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Yankee Humor. In his recently published volume of reminiscences, entitled, "In Slums and Society,." the lion. and Rev. Canon Adderley mentions as a curious fact that Mr. Gladstone used to dIoubt the wit and humor of the American. There was, however, one story (says Mr. Adderley) which he tllought saved their reputation-namely, (that of the Yankee who when asked how far It was to a certain place, said: "I guess if you go the way you're going it's about twenty-four thousand miles, but if you turn around anti go the other way it's about five hundred yardo." But the G.O.3M. should have kept his eyes and ears open. This surely is muchl funnier. A Chicago man and a SL Louis man had a bet as to which could tell the biggest lie in so many minutes. The former began, "There was once a gentleman in Chicago-" "HIere, take your ten dollars," said he from St. Louis. "I can't beat that."
COURAGE. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
COURAGE. Great courage is not learned where all Is calm, The life of pleasure cannot mould a noble soul; lio who would gain the mountain top must toil and climb, Though clouds and darkness round his pathway roll! The sunbeam could. not paint the flowers of spring, Or give them sweetness without frost and tempest rain, So life would prove to us a weak antd worthless thing, Apart from trial and its hours of pain. True courage springs not from tihe plane of ease, 'Tis conflict strengthens for the greater strife, And vests the mind with more en during power to run Thle race that builds the noblest formn of life. Live nobly, then, with courage firm and true. 31eet trials faithfully and fearless as they come, Thoughl end and object hidden from thy finite view, They're cloud-steps reaching up ward to thy home. o-R. Iare. Cooranbong, N.S.W.
The Spirit of Patriotism [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
The Spirit of Patriotism There is not the slightest doubt that the great majiority of Australians are patriotic. That is evidenced by the acclamations of the people when they welcome home the battle-scarred heroes whom tile fortune of war has rendered unit for further active ser vice. The returned men personify the spirit of bravery that character ises the Australians still carrying on in the trenches. Tihe cheerfulness of demeanor of tihe returning men as they step off the various hospital ships and transports is a clear proof of their confidence that the Allies are on the winning side and that althoughll compelled to retire from the fighting ranks they are satisfied with the fact that they have participated in a just cause. Their experiences have brought hiome to them the realisation of what would have occurred to this fair land of ours had not the Allies so gallantly repulsed the onslaughts of the aggres sire Hun. If all tihe tit men of Austral lia were imbued with the same feel ...
REMEMBERED HER. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
REMEMBERED HER. The millionaire who had set off from the little village as a foulrteen year-old Dick Whittington was re turning after many years to his na tire place, and there was great er citement. The worthy village folk found him little changed and very glad to see them. He went round the village shaking hands and chatting with everybody. Suddenly an elderly spinster de tached herself' from the crowd and came simpering up to him. "Oh, Mr. Moneybags," she cooed, '"I'm sure you don't remember me," "Remember you ?" cried the mil lionaire. "Of course I remember VOU." The elderly spinster looked trium phantly round. "As if I could forget you." went on Mr. Moneybags. "Why, you're one of the landmarks of the old place." The burglar had just begun his term, and was assigned to work in the broom factory. Near him was an oldish man who studied him intent ly and seemed to be waiting an op portunity to say something. "How long are you in for 7" he whispered. "Twelve years," replied the new ...
SCOTLAND FOR EVER. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
SCOTLAND FOR EVER. The scene was a cinema place, where the Somme battle-pictures were being flickered. As the Warwickshires were seen go ing over the top to the attack, an excited Birmingham man exclaimed, triumphantly: "What about your Highland regiments now ?" As luck would have it. there was a short, bandy-legged Scot in a kilt within hearing. He flared up and replied: "What aboot oor Hielant regiments? Why, they are keeping back the Germans while your ,men are getting their pho tographs taken !"'
The Heart of Daphne Published by Special Arrangement. Copyright. CHAPTER IV. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
The leart of Daphne By LADY TROUBRIDGE, Author of "The Cheat," "The Soul of "'Honor," "Love, the Locksmith,." 'The Girl with the Blue Eyes," etc. Published by Special Arrangement. Copyright C?APTER IV. Daphne drew herself up; hler face., hIer whole hearing had changed under tile insulting tone in which she was addressed. "Very well, Mrs. Miller," she said quietly. "If that is your tone when I come to youl for help and advice, it is very certain that I have come to the wrong place. We won't speak of it any more. f shall go to Lord Mend ham.' She had turned pale, and the face above the white collar and black dress was rigid, but it bore an aspect of strength and power that could not be ignored. The housekeeper recovered herself with a tremendous effort. Her face was sallow, and her lips trembled, but her manner altered entirely. * "Now, Miss MIerrycourt,." she said. with a half-nervous laugh, "don't you go off at a tangent like'this. You up set me. I will own, talking such non sense, ...
CHEAP TRAVELLING. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
CHEAP TRAVELLING. Private Mackintosh had been inva lided home from the East, and -ater a spell in hospital was let out on phss for a few hours. He boarded a 'bus, and offered the girl twopence, mentibning his destination. "Threepence, please l" said the conduetress. - "It used to be twopence," said Mackintosh. "It's threepence now, sir!" said the girl firmly. "Too much, too much .' muttered Mackintosh. "Why, I've been to Me sopotamia and back- for less than that !" He (thinking of ways and means) : "I really feel, darling, that I a~m hardly justified in taking you frbm your father's roof !" She: "Oh, that's quite all right. :I don't live on the roof." Mrs. Brown's poor husband had un fortunately been laid up for six months now. But the glad news that he wan on the high road to re covery had come at lanst. "I'm so glad to hear that Your hus hand is getting better," remarked a kindly lady to Mrs. Brown one day. "Well, so am I, mum. He was get ting along so nicely List week, but now th...
STEAMED RICE. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
STEAMED RICE. Plenty of timrmust be allowed to cook rice in- this- way. Wash two cupfuls of the best quality, and put it into a jar with eight cupfuls of cold water and a small teaspoonful of salt. Cover and stand the jar in a sauce pan of boiling water, and Fteam for quite two hours or even longer. Do not stir thle rice.* When done, serve with milk uand sugar or' with treacle or stewed fruit. With stewed dates it is excellent ;anl cheap, as this fruit does not requllire sugar. The rmaid: ".Jacki, I do believe that was a bhad shilling you put in the coliection plate for the heathen." The Reprobate: "Quite true. I owe the heathen-a grudge for eating Sa mieaionary uncle of mine I"
TURNIP TOPS. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
TURNIP TOPS. We ueed not complain of IaAki of green vegetables while we can get turnip tops; these are cheap and wonderfully wholesome, being good for the blood. As a "spring medl cine" they cannot be too highly praised. Wash them well in several changes of water, as they are gritty, like spinach. Boil them in plenty of salted water, and when tender, drain them, chop them finely, and either serve with meat, or alone with a lit tle butter rubbed over the top.
CHINA'S WONDERFUL NEWS CARRIERS. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
CHINA'S WONDERFUL NEWS CARRIERS. - --- Travellers who. return from the re mote interior of vast countries where telegraphs and railways are practical ly unknown will tell you of the as tonishing swiftness with which news travels, despite the seeming absence of facilities. Away in the wilds of the Tihetar, border, or in the Mongolian deserts, hlundreds of miles from the nearest telegraph wire, the traveller will per chance hear of some momentous event in the outside world within an incredibly short while of its happen ing. This rapid transmission of news is.the work of natives employed in courier services of higher organisa tion than we have ever dreamed. China, that spacious land where dis tance is measured by days, not miles, affords the best example. For, al though the means of communication by rail and telegraph have greatly de veloped there of late, the bulk of thn interior is still virgin to these inven tions of the "foreign deo1l." and China still maintains what has been from ...
A KINGDOM IN PAWN. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
A KINGDOM IN PeAWN. It is not generally known that the Orkney Islands, though supposed to be part and parcel of the British Em pire, are, in reality, held by England exactly as the pawnbroker 'holds the watch of the impecunious individual who has temporarily parted with that useful article. These islands are only held by us in pawn, and Nor way, as it were, holds the ticket. Long ago Orkney, together with the Hebrides on the west coast of Scot land., belonged to Norway. After the battle of Large, Norway ceded the latter to Scotland for a cash payment of 4000 marks, and an Annual tribute of 100 marks. This tribute, known in history as the Annual of Norway, had to be paid regularly under a penalty. In 13'7, Norway, Sweden, and Den mark were united untler one crown, and when Christian became king of the United realms, Scotland had neg lected the annual payment for forty years, incurring a penalty of 40,000 marks. King Christian promptly sent with a request for immediate pay ment. Scotl...