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UNSEEMLY MIRTH. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
UNSEEMLY MIRTH. The stranger was stranded in the little town for four or five hours, and was looking about for a means of occupying his time. Hearing sounds of merriment issuing from what was known as the public hall, he strolled up to the ticket office and asked: "What's on here to-night ?" "The Amateur Dramatic's perform ance, sir." His voice was drowned by another burst of uproarious baughter. "The audience seems to be having a good time. What's the play ?" " "Hamlet," said the booking-clerk solemnly. The old soldier was again giving the youngster accounts of the won ders he had experienced, especially in the way of climate. Said he : "I remember when we were in Fy zardum we used to toast oilu bread in the sun, and Youngster (interrupting) : "Yes, I know, and you were supplied with corkscrews to draw your breath !" Officer : "Now, Private Jenkins, I am going to give you a very resgon sil,Ie job. Under our advanced trench is a large mine, I want you to stay there, and when the min...
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
This Good Old-Fashioned Home-Made Remedy Restores Your Hair to Its Natural Color. This home-made preparation is un equalled as a powerful stimulant to the growth of the hair, and for re storing it-not dyeing it-to its na tural color. It is equally good for re moving dandruff, giving the hair life, brilliancy and color, for stopping itch ing and keeping the scalp in first-class condition. It is not greasy or sticky, and there is no coloring to rub off at nights on to the bed linen. Get IZaoz, of Rejuveni Compound from the cheniast, to which add loz. of Bay Rum. Shake well together; then add enough water to make lOoz. (/- pint) in all. - A little rubbed well into the roots of the hair every night will soon completely restore the natural color of the hair and renew the growth where thinness is showing. Almost every chemist has these sim ple ingredients in stock, or can eas ily get them for you from the whole salers. S. H. Henesall, Chemist, 246 Clar endon-street, South Melbourne. Coun ...
THE "DEAD" PAST. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
THE "DEAD" PAST. Jeremiah and Jane were seated be_ - side the fire. It was Jane's birthday, and the poor old woman thought Jeremiah had forgotten the fact. She hedged a bit and hinted, and Jeremiah didn't "catch on." At last she said, half playfully : "Whar are ye goin' to give me fer me birthday, Jerry ?" Jeremiah 'pondered. "Well. Jane," he said, "I've kept yer for thirty years come August, and the thought o' that ought to be enough of a birthday present for Ver!" : 'Timothy M'Shane had been arrested on the charge of stealing a costly gilt chair from the residence of Mrs. Highstone. On being arraigned be fore the judge, his Honour asked Tim what he had to say for himself, to which Tim replied :-- "Shure, yer Honour, 01 will ex plain th' hull thing to yez. -I wint to say Mrs. Highstone on bizness fer me boss. Oi rung the bell, and a'sar-. vint kim to'th' dure, an' whin 01 axed to say Mrs. Highstone the earvint. towld me to go into the parlour an' take a chair." "Well ?" said the ju...
WISE AND OTHERWISE. KNOWING BIRD. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
WISE AND OTHERWISE. KNOWING BIRD. He was a good fellow, though a bad shot. so he was asked to join the shooting party. The gamekeeper, in great disgust, watched him miss ag ain and again. "Dear me," said the sportsman, "the birds seem exceptionally strong on the wing this year I" "Not all of 'em, sir,". said the man. "You've shot at the same bird a dozen times. 'E's follerin' yer ab out." "Why ?" asked the sportsman. "'Dunno," said the gamekeeper, "un less he's 'anging about you for safe ty ,".
HOUSEHOLD HINTS. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
HOUSU HOLD- HINTS. A little dry mustard rubbed on the hands will remove the smell of fish from them. To remove dirt .from white paint usc the water in which two or three onions have been boiled. Add a, pinch of salt to apples to make them tender. They will cook in less time and will taste better. When making a mustard-plaster mix with it the white of an egg ; this will prevent the plaster from causing a blister. Two potatoes grated together in a basin of warm water are excellent for washing delicate silk, flannel, or woollen goods. A bowl of vinegar and water plac ed beside the stove will prevent the smell of cooking from spreading through thebhouse. Allow cabbage water to become quite cold before pouring down the sink, and there will be no unpleasant smell. Mice do not like the smell of pep piermint, and a little 'oil of pepper mint placed about their haunts will soon make them look for other quar te.s. , Baking soda gives instant relief to a burn or scald. Applied either wet or dr...
"TURN AGAIN—" [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
"TURN AGAIN--" The grey-green uniformed men were being drilled, and the burly but good tempered sergeant was almost in des pair about No. 9 in the front rank? "Now try 'left turn' again!" he shouted encouragingly. "It's quite simple. Swivel round on the left heel -so !" No. 9 groaned, and mumbled : "I wish you'd let us do right turn a bit !" ; "Why ?" asked the sergeant. "Because my wretched rublier-heel is coming unscrewed !" was the re ply.
TOO STALE FOR THEM. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
TOO STALE FOR THEsM. Mr. Will Tellum was furious. He dashed into the editorial sanctum of the "Chin Wagger" over the pros trate form of the office-boy, and con fronted the editor himself. "Look here !" he bellowed. "This paper said I was a liar !" "Oh, no, it did not !" replied the editor calmly. "It did, I say !" "I say 'No !' " "Well, some paper said it !" splut tered Tellum. "Possibly it was our contemporary down the street," said the editor sweetly, fingering a paper weight. "We never print stale news !"
No Title [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 13 July 1917
Mr J. T. Ramsay, the Government potato expert, is to deliver a lecture in Pakenham on the evening of the 26th instant, under the auspices of the'local Fruitgrowers' and Horti curtural Society. There should be a good attendance, as the lecture will be both instructive and interesting.. A meeting of delegates from the churches corntituting the Pakenham Presbyterian Mission will be held at Pakenham to-morrow afternoon to dis cuss matters in connection with the workings of the church. The Rev. H. Buntine, of Dandenong, will preside. At the last meeting of the commit tee of Pakenham and District Fruit growers' and Horticultural Society sympathetic reference- was made to the death of the late Mr W. H. Bloomfield, one of the society's most energetic workers, and on the motion of Mr J. J. Millane and Mr J. Reg. Henty it was agreed to send a letter of condolence to Mrs Bloom field. Mr and Mrs W. Rhoden, who have taken the Pakenham Hotel, come from Port Albert, where they were in busi ness fo...
KEEP A STOCKPOT. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
KEEP A STOCKPOT. Just as it is sheer waste to peel potatoes and throw away the peel uings, instead of steaming and roast ing them in their jackets, so it is sheer waste to consign cheese rind, bacon rind, tops of vegetables, and bread crusts and crumbs to the dust hinr Used in the stockpot they help to add nutriment. We pour down the sink the water in which vegetables have been boiled, instead of preserving it for stock, containing as it does valuable salts. We use fresh bread, instead of bread a day or two old. We have not learned yet how to make toad-in-the hole with a dash of vinegar instead of eggs, and Irish stew with little meat and plenty of lentils. And the senseless way of cooking carrots with a lot instead of a little water, and thus wasting their food properties, is still pursued. Well-balanced food should have the commodities that give protein and the commodities that give starch. Of the former, one's choice may vary be tween bacon, eggs, and milk; of the latter, between...
DRIPPING BEATS BUTTER. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
DRIPPING BEATS BUTTER. The fried fresh herring, which has the nutritive worth of half a pound of steak, ought, served with potatoes, to make a tasty midday meal twice a week. The potato gives it the right starch balance. Far too much meat is eaten, under belief that meat is the best of foods ; yet a chop, which costs sevenpence and will satisfy only one person, is only equal in food value to seven pennyworth of butter beans, which will satisfy fotEr persons. A baked potato, served with a lit tle dripping, is a most wholesome dish. Potato-pie deserves a much greater popularity than it obtains to day, for it entails little culinary skill. Two or three boiled potatoes are cut up and mixed with cut tomatoes, turnips, a finely-chopped onion, sage, pepper and salt. and a dash of lemon Juice to flavour; the contents put into a pudding-basin, covered in the ordinary, way with., a crust, and al lowed to steam until cooked. Result, a cheap and tasty dinner for at least two people. Bread and d...
Ladies' Column. TASTY AND CHEAP. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Ladies' Column. -4----- TASTY AND CHEAP. Porridge and milk contain the four main classes of nutriment--proteins, fats, starches, and sugars. Bread-and-butter and cheese . form an excellent nourishing diet and an alternative for roasts and grills. Stewing is the.best method of cook ing economically. Potatoes should be washed in cold water ; warm water drawn out the nourishment. Eggs combined with milk and cheese form the most economical of egg dishes. Dandelion leaves make splendid sa lads. Food scarcity will teach us wis dom. Often the cheapest and most despised foodeare the best. There is the modest herring, appe tising and satisfying, yet barred from the well-to-do man's table, though in food value it easily outclasses most of the dearer varieties of fish. People in England have, unfortu nately, not acquired the taste for the pickled herring, which the Dutch ex port in large quantities ; but the Jews, who from Biblical times have always been noted for their scientific understandin...
WHEN THE FOOT "SLEEPS." [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
WHEN THE FOOT "SLEEPS." The strange sensation of the foot "going to sleep" is due to a mechani cal obstruction of the geat sciatic nerve. When we sit for a long time with our legs crossed or with the back of the thigh pressing upon the edge of a chair the sciatic nerve is squeezed. The sciatic nerve is the biggest in the body. It springs from the sacral plexus, that labyrinth in the small of the baclk formed by a bianch of the fourth lumbar nerve, the fifth lum bar nerve and the first, second and third sacral nerves. It "supplies nearly the whole of the integument of the leg, the muscles of the back of the thigh, and those of the leg and foot." Somewhere about the lower third of the thigh it divides into two, and these again branch out all over the lower leg and foot. The sciatic, like all other nerves, is real ly a great bundle of nerve fibres, each of which has its own thin sheath. These are wrapped in connective tie sue and covered by a general sheatl., which encloses arteries su...
BALDNESS AND CONSUMPTION [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
BALDNESS AND CONSUMPTION There are advantages in alm st everything. Even the bald-headed man has something to be thankful for. It is a curious belief, held by many people, that you will never finl a bald-headed man in danger of dying from consumption. Bald-headed men are said to seldom suter from con sumption, and that a tendency to baldness is assurance that the dread ed scourge will pass over him whose thatch rrows thin. At first glance it would seem absurd to argue that a man's heir is indicative of his im munity from disease, but a well known- doctor recently declared that in the five years'during which he seri ousiy added a record of his patients' hair, or lack. of it, his case cards have failed to show a single instance of "bald" being entered upon the card of a consumptive. He had under treatment more than 700 cases, and he makes the further statement that in a census of more that 5,000 tuber culosis cases he failed to discover a single sufferer who was bald. - He makes no ef...
Officer. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Officer. On Friday, the 6th instant, one of the most successful concerts ever held in the district took place in the local hair, which was very tastefully deco rated for the occasion. Although tihe night was not very bright, visitors came from all the surrounding towns, and the hall was crowded. Mr Adams made a very capable chairman. The scenes from "The House that Jack Built," and other operas, which were very ably arranged by Mrs O'Brien, were very enjoyable. The accompani ments were played by Mrs Henwood, Mrs O'Brier. and Miss Lewis. A very enjoyable dance followed, from thirty to forty couples taking part. The music was supplied by Mr Stone. Mr Heggart acted as M.C., and a very dainty supper was provided by the ladies. The concert programme was as follows;-Overture, MIrs O'Brien and Miss Beadle; chorus, The Anthems, Mrs O'Brien and the Misses Beadle (4), Jackson, Redfern and Petersen; recitation, Miss M. Beadle; song, Miss Hilda Mansfield; dance, Miss Yates; song, Miss A. Maxwel...
FOR THE FIRE-FIGHTER. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
FOR THE FIRE-FIGHTER. No longer will the fear of being overcome by poisonous gases or struck on the head by .falling objects be entertained in the minds of the Cincinnati firemen, for they have been equipped with a new oxygen helmet of the very latest-type. Natural air is supplied from a tank in the rear of the helmets, while an ordinary air pump is used to put 2001b. of pres sure in the tank before use. The air flows out of the tube ini front of the flremar.'s nose, and inhaled air is forced out by the new air through Ilamb'swool pads on the shoulders. Special telephone ear-pieces .on the sides ofrthe helmet make it possible for the wearer to hear commands, while the glass visorl may be cleaned by pressing a button. The helmets are reinforced on top to withstand blows such as would be received from fallingbricks. There is room enough to keep the top of the helmet from coming down on the fireman's head when it is struck. To give the fire man a chance to call for help in case of trou...
Berwick News. [Newspaper Article] — Pakenham Gazette and Berwick Shire News — 20 July 1917
Berwick News. The annual meeting of the local branch of the Red Cross takes place to-day. During the year the branch has accomplished good work, and the secretary (Mrs Webster). will be able to furnish a very satisfactory report. It is probable that a speaker from the city will be present to deliver an ad dress. The election of officers for the ensuing year will be held after the report and balance sheet have been dealt with. At the local court, held on Friday last, before Mr V. Tanner, P. M. and Messrs a'Beckett, Greaves and Harvey Smith, J's.P., Mr Julius Hilbrich sued the Cranbourne shire council for £22 10s 6d, balance on contract for work done. Mr Herald appeared for Hillbrich and Mr Peers for the shire council. After hearing the evidence the Bench unanimously found for plaintiff, with £4 4s costs against the council. Mr and Mrs J. Gardiner have re ceived an interesting war relic from their son, Sergeant C. Gardiner, in the shape of three German bayonets.