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The Song of the Sandwich. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
- ;The Songof?the; Sandwich. I come from mystic, hidden haunts, I'm set forth as a ration; I'm found in all the restaurants, At every railway sta'tion. By hungry men I'm swiftly seized, Andheldcbetiveen their fingers ; And wheni their teeth and tongues I've teased, My mem'ry ever lingers. I'm harder than a miser's heart, ,,":And toughertfar than rubber ; " .M mustard malkes tie'fteanidrops sBrt; And causes men to blubber.
An Alarming Disease A[?]cting a Numerous Class. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
An.Alarming Disease Afict in? a Numerous Class.. The diseas commences with a slight de angement of the stomach, but if neglected; it in tube involves the whole frame, emn bracing the lddaeye, liver, pancreas, and, in fact, the.'entire glandular system, and the Safflicted drags out a mi3erable existence until death gives relief from suffering. The .disease is often mistaken for other com plaints; but if the reader will ask himself 'iefollowing questions, he will be able to dtermine whether he himself is one of the aaUtekd-Has I distress, pain, or difficulty, ini bbtathing After eating 7 Is there a dull, I.e?'vyfeeliik, attended by drowsiness? .Havr.the eyes a yellow tinge? Does a thick, sticky, mucous gather about the gums and teeth in the mornings, accompanied by a disagreeable taste ? Is the tongue coated ? Is there painsia the side and back? Is there a fulnew~ . aborthe right side as if the liver ire eularging ? Is there costiveness? Is there vertigo or dizziness when rising sud d...
The Barmaid. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
The Barmaid, .ua When day is dead and the sunny hours 'Are all asleep 'mid the dreamy.flowers, When waves leap up on their sandy bars To clasp to their bosom the burning stars, WhIn gaslights quiver, and, dancing, shine In the ruby beads of the blushing .wine- When guilt and riot and madness meet, To add fresh Sears for the world to weep,. You meet her decked in the blazing hall, The'chosen queen of the carnival. Look at her form, it is full of grace-. Look at the lines of her fair young face- - Look at her tresses which darkly float Inrilken clouds o'er her snow-white throat; Riebly jewelled and young and fair Askher whateril chance brought her there. She answers Lust, in it, purpose twain-., The lust of the eye and the lust of gain;,i ', Gain for the master who daily gives . Thescanty pittance on which she lives Uindlywelcome and smile and jest .! : . ; Yorach who dmes as her mnaster's guest. The day ge dead and the grieenfields lie In the moon's white arms without sob or sigh;' S...
Serious Charge against William Costello. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
Serious Charge a1"iO.S William Oostellq; William Costello, a sergeant in the artillery, was brought up at the police cnurt on Tuesday charged on warrant with having on the 3id inst:attemipteil to .commit . rape on .lizabeth Law rence. Tie bheinch was occupiedrtby Mr Heron,. P .Mr:, Mess:s Ienly, s?iiipson; Stone nian, :D> 'illiamnislJsP. anid: r. Cuzens, .. Tlhe comrt: was cleared, the press and a. few military officersrenimaining. : Inspectoir ;Toohev conducoted the pro secutioon, and "!I Di ywuo detefindcld" the . 'lilietlh Liwrence deposed tlhat she i.wa a natv.e of Adelaide. alind :was; 24 ,ears. of age:. -Had (been two :years in Victoria. :,as eiiployed an-tthe, GCrand Shotel (ii Melbourne), Esplanade and B:laillieu hotels; an"t was iiaw engaged: as cnok at .the Royal. On Tuesdai even ing, rd of M?arch,'lcft'tli hotel about a- quarter to 8 -inlcopany with Aniinie Liailess and:M iiy Mooire_ '.Rodo- dow?. in the '?lis to the ailhfiv:station On: coming oiut of tim' rail?wai' st...
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
NOW READY. irioce Sizenco, By Post Eightponce. A NEW WORK ON F EPRODUCTIVE ORCANS : PO ULTO N, The above work is a p nular treatise on ':i- REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS, showing t.iir :Construction, Functians, and the s;rangements to which they are liahle. ' is little book is one which may. be lraised with advantage by all who-ire: .'-. irons of obtaining information on a subject which ought to form a portion of d'" .hducation of the Male sex. A kn -w. 2 i!2ge, of this subject is undoubtedly of a: culable value, as by it many of the ? which afflict after life may be avoi led remedied. Sopies will be forwarde l under strict . 2ver to any address on receipt of postage ;'amps issued by any of the colonies, R. J. POULTON, -86 BOURKE STREET .AST, MELBOURNE. ?·.? . ;. .OENN1S sr. #'- s ?.English .and Colonial .Gods' at Be dced Price . OR ER )r 0 OFs I o.ort mg t o . (f g-t: 0 S, an : AOICr -PLAC fIa tf "r i .nush '.1r: Colonial T o"; Aat ,1e .SEia .?ar.ttention pind n...o ,-sen .xx otk: either Eng...
Well Educated. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
Well Educated. Lady-- " You have not icen out to sbrvide yet, therefore you have no character." Applicant-" No, mum; but I have three School Board certificuts." '. :Lady--" Ah, well; that is something.; Ari they for honesty, cleanliness, or--?" SApplicant-" No, please, mum; for litera toor, jograffy, and free 'and drorin',"
The Man Under the Bed. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
The Man i Under thie~ Be, Very. fulnny things- have happened with children.ii pihtis, but thl? worst occurred.to bMiss Ada Gray, vcho ?ias goihgito play' "East Lynne." in Rihlinini :On her arrival for rehearsal on the morniig of tlie pefformance the child who way tn represent-" Willie" wa4 nut foit tto: n10g.' The stage mnapager as suired the :ti rtlihatth child l who had played thio pairt? blfoire :\° uhl comel arid ?thatit would, bel'' all right, at inight;'!; But the childl Was ill and "could rot c.come.; ,The imanao,,er put his smallest ballet girl in the bed, btgt as she couldin't remember the lines, ihe g6t'iunder'the lied wvithi the proipt'book. The~.star was 'staggered . when 'she'i i a, the ' length of, the. child lying: benieath the, clohes, liut ,she. struggled bravely on. I'Whennthe puioinpter's voice, disguised, but still liarhi~ add. hoarse, ca'me out; star and atilkitýe alike tittered, but the iady 'made on effort; nd threw. herself,in simulated. agony •on the bed: Th...
An Actor In Pawn. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
An' Aotor In Pawn:. The celebrated tragedian, Mr. Cooke, ~vas always fonid of a frolic ofn his 'benefit night, declaring that he-never-took liberties with his friends at any other time. It.happened once during an engagement at Philadelphii, that 6n such :an occasion :hel·was short of money, did at a loss where to?raise the wind for the accustomed breeze. In this dilemma. he started up town in a speculative mood, de? termined to inspirit himself in some way or other. Suddenly his eyes perceived one of. those enticing signs of three golden balls.` He turned the: corner and entered the fatal door and addressed the"mand behind the counter thus- ... , "My name is Cooke. Thiis is iny benefit night.. The mauager can't do without me. I am up for Richard the-Third. I want some supper. I have no money. Now i propose to hypothecate my royal person for £2, andl you may lay inc upon one of your shelves." The joke was a queer, bne- and the pawn broker paid the £2, and Cooke was laid up. The theat...
A Little Wife. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
-A Little Wife. A dainty, wee and winsome thing, . Like her the poet sings ; Who seems to tread this grosser earth Unborne by.fairy wings-. , Who walks, and talks, and sings, and smiles, In such a witching way, That love must ih her pathway spring As flowers spring in' May! I Ah ! nature is a thrifty dame, .Who will ecoupmise; Her precious things she always makes So very smalliin size. And though her ruder.wealth she pours On river, sea!and land, ? Her perfect wdrks are miniatures, Wrought finely out' by hand. The little bird, as all can vouch, Has e'er the sweetest song; STo little flowers in tle shade, S The sweetest blooms belong ; The little gem of purest ray. Is found without a flaw - -- Ad.little women.rule:the-world--- B e r By universal law. And yet her hands, so soft and white, Seem only made to dling'; Her little fingers, rosy-tipped, SSeemed fettered bya ring Her glove would make a modiste rave, And inake a poet swear And scores of brave and manly hearts Are tangled in he...
Harqline [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 14 March 1885
IIe-" c My dear, I founrid:theset stockings lying across the parlor chair." She-" You goosey ! those are my new'thread gloves.": A young Fitzroy lady,'being chbaged by a gentleman with having trifled with his feel ings, exclainicd-" Well, I. plead jilty." " Holw does'the new girl sti'ike you ?" asked a citizen of Prahran at dinner lately. "She hasn't struck me yet." 'ainsered-liis wife, meekly, "but she has done almost everything else." -; " Which do you like the best, your father or your mother " inquired a visitor of a little chubby fist. " Oh, I like ma the :Best. She spanks me with the soft side of her handr; 'pa uses a stick;" The man who can thoroughly enjoy himni " self.st a , fashionable - reception,: afteri dis covering that: the, bows of his white tie, is under his left ear, is superior. to':the pomps and vanities of this wicked world.? :. There are a great many people who always forget to bring home tihe articles their wives tellthem to buy. We advise them to try-our plan...
Frightened Him. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 21 March 1885
Frighlteied Him, Our canvasscr;, ovho had brr.oed a shilling to pay' for. his night's lodging at a restaurant, .saw a person climbing in-the window of his bedroom. "Look here,:old man," said he, " if you in tend to rob me, you'll get into debt. I've only got two unreceipted washing bills, and a run-out pawn ticket." &lt;,The would-be robber fled.
Ask Papa. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 21 March 1885
Ask Papa. It is scarcely six m6nthsago that the ac knowledged belle of Albert. Park rejoiced in the name of Miss Beaver, more familiarly know as Jenny Beaver, and especially noted for her wealth of dark brown hair. She was exceedingly pretty all through, and' was quite aware ot the fact. The number of hearts she has broken would fill a large potato sack, and she has had the pleasure of saying "No " more times than is good for a girl of her age. Half the young ladies hated the sight of her, and described her as a "forward, flirting hussy," but they were very carclla to avoid allowing their own young men tvo much in tercourse with her. 'One young gentleman especially was very much taken up with her, and-used to save up all his spare money, and take her to the theatres and send her valen tines of a highly amatory character. He was a clerk in a prominent jewellery store in town, and was very soft, fully believing that Jenny was "mashed on him. He con stantly wore a lock of hair in his w...
A Fact. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 21 March 1885
A Fact. A good old minister, of whom it was told, always used to have the book containing the banns put on the reading-desk just at his right hand. One-Sunday morning he began as usual, " I publish the banns of marriage between- " and putting down his hand in all confidence for the book, found to his dis may that it was not there. In his nervous ness, while searching for the missing register, he kept on repeating the formula, "I pub lish the banns of marriage between-I pub. lish the banns of marriage lbtween-" till at last the clerk from beneath, in sheer pity, came to the rescue with a suggestion, and whispered loudly enough to be heard all over the churchb, "'Between the dushion and;thl desk, sir." The book had simply slipped under the cushion. The result of the acci dent was a publication of banns which I should imagine to be unique. The 'latest; rumour: is that the friends of General 'Gordon aire about to take an action against the papers for the elegies it published on him. The...
The Girl and the Gloater. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 21 March 1885
The Girl and the Gloater. There was a masher Of great renown. Not any " flasher" Upon the town To cut a dash or To "do it brown." His forte was smoking Of cigarettes, His whiskers stroking, * And making bets; And also joking About his debts. He:was just worth as Much as men lent Though Belles and Berthas Believed him sent Upon the earth as An ornament. His thorax sawed he With collars tall, And May and Maudie This ghost would call The gay and gaudy M~~ asher of all. He knew no books and He knew no news : Learning would cooks and . Bar-girls confuse They loved his looks and His pointed shoes. But too much glory Is apt to cloy, ((Mdemento moar Clouds all our joy) And thus the story. Of thii gay boy. He stood one morn, or Noon, 'we've forgot Which, at the corner, His gen'ral spot, As its adorner ' Were he-why nbt ? A bright face flashing Across the way, Dark fringes, lashing: Soft eyes of gray ; lHe started mashing Would you not, say ? An upper floor in A draper's shop A square glass d...
The Secret of a Patent Pill. [Newspaper Article] — The Queenscliff Sentinel — 21 March 1885
The Secret of a Patent Pill. Some years ago the frequenters 'of the Italian and French restaurants which abound ini Soho and Saffron Hill were frequently in terrupted at their meals by the entrance of a character well known to the foreign colony, and whom all agreed to respect and humor. He was a little man of stately mien and slow and solemn., stride. His features seemed familiar even to them who saw'hini for the first time, and a glance at the broze medal that hung from his breast at once recalled the likeness. Undoubtedly the old man, despite his age and threadbare coat, bore a striking resem blance to the great Napoleon, whose effigy in bronze was engraved on the military decora tion he so proudly displayed. Strange as it may seem, it is from the coincidence that one of the most popular pills and medicines in existence. became known -to. the, British public. .. Albinolo-such was the old man's name was born' in -Piedmont, and had lived pro= bably- amidst the -wild ,mountaius of h...