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Didn't Matter to Them. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
Didn't Matter to Them. A Northerner riding through the West Virginian mountains came up with a mountaineer leisurely driving a herd of pigs. "Where are you driving the pigs to?" asked the rider. "Out to pasture 'em a bit." "What for?" "To fatten 'im." "Isn't it pretty slow work to fatten 'em on grass? Up where X come from we pen them up and feed them on corn. It saves a lot of time." "Yaas; I s'pose so," drawled the mountaineer. "But what's time to a hawg anyway?"
Financial Genius. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
Financial Genius. "Sonny," began the book canvasser, "would this be a good time to see the manager?" "Got yer life insured?" queried the office boy. "Now, look here, old man," contin ued the fellow in confidential tones, "you and I must fix this little matter up. Your business is to keep us fel lows out of the office, isn't it?" "That's right." "At the same time you need a little extra coin for balls and parties and dinners?" "To say nuthin' of grand opera." "Of course. Now, old pal, I'll tell you what we'll do. You get an inter view for me with the head of the firm, and I'll hand you half a crown be fore I leave. Why, I've got a book here that he'll jump at." "No good!" replied the boy, after a few moments' thought. "But why not?" "Because a man as smart as you would sell our boss so many books he'd be broke for months, an' I'd lose Ave shillings a week in tips I gets from other fellows. It's your move, Algernon." And the book canvasser sighed and moved on. ,/ A wit. sitting down a...
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
SOROSES LIQUID FACH l'OWDHK. In till-so (I:1J'H >.f outdoor life-motoring, golli'i'i, lin.itinjj, >o.-a mliitljln and Imvii. I.ms lii[iiiJ powi'.itr'b r.nn of ll>o >,&lt; oifH'lit-. of 1 ift*. S'.-rosi s T-'qnM Punc Powder i fonnd liycxp'Tti to bu h p'-ifp-tlj invnlimhli preparation -mil n dcfii.'ed improvement or the ol.l-fiisliionnl ? lry p '-.wlfr lk'sidi s im proving tin' cippinrnr.ce i- us a shield to the delicite fltiii of Hip f«;e against hot wind*, dust, sninta and other extr.nicoo.' matin". Piiap 2s 91 Obtain d)Ie at Pf C. Phillips' Fancy Goods Sture, Tunyamoh. JOB PRINTING doje at The Express . cffice at Melbourne prices. A trial solicited. PUBLIC NOTICES PIGS PIGS. PIGS wanted in any quanliij Highest Prices and, more than all, SPOT CASH. GEORGE EDGELL, TuDgamah. 88 ELIZABETH STREET, MELBOURNE 01 VICTORIA AVENUE, ALB'-CRT PAKE M. L. THOMAS (Recorded by the Dental Board of Victoria), considers your interests, so consult lis during our visits-it will repa...
Suspicious Money. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
Suspicious Money. The story is told of a certain law yer who was retained as counsel for a man who stepped in a hole in the street and broke his leg. A suit was brought against the city in the sum o£ £500, and the lawyer won the case.. The city appealed to the Su preme Court, but here also the ver dict was in favor of the plaintiff. After setting up the claim, the law yer handed his client a half-sovereign. "What is this for?" asked the man. "That is what is left after taking out my fee, the cost of the appeal, and other expenses." "What is the matter with this?" the client asked. "Is it bad?"
Brain and Muscle. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
Brain and Muscle. . The manager o£ a factory went into the store one day and saw one of the storemen tugging at a big case of goods. His face was red, and the muscles on his neck were bulging out. / "Hold' on t.iei-e, Jack," cried the manager, "allow me to demonstrate to you the power of brain over mus cle." He then grabbed a hook that was on a shelf and stuck it into the case, and, giving it a quick jerk, he fell backward into a pile of rubbish. He rose as gracefully as he could, saying to the storeman, "Bother it, the handle was loose!" "Yes, sir," replied Jack, "that's why I didn't use it."
SMALL MERCIES. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
SMALL MERCIES. The young English tourist who had boon staying for n week at a hotel in tho Scottish Highlands, for the pur poso of taking advantage of tho fish ing, was, at the end en iliat time, rather inclined to think that, the fish ing had taken advantage ci' him. Ho had caught nothing, and his expanses, of course, had been none tho less heavy. On the last uay of his stay, however, he landed a fine saimoii. "Well, Doaiald," he said to a cauny Scot at the hotel, as lie proudly sur veyed tho fish; "it's a nico eaten, and BO it ouzht to be. It has cost me £15 at least." "Aweel," replied Donald calmly, ."it's a gr-great blessiu' yo didna catch
Clearing the Way. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
Clearing the Way. rorceps m nand, the young dentist smilingly approached his patient. "You're sure you're an experienced man':" nervously inquired the victim, noticing the dentist's youth. "I'm I'm quite a coward, you know! Ha! ha!" "My dear sir," assured the youtli. "in one minute it will all bffcover. So: Ah! Now then." "You-how!" roared the patient, clapping his hand to his jaw. Then he looked up to see the dentist smil ing benevolently at him. "There!" said the young man. "That's out! Did it hurt?" "Hurt!" roared the patient. "Hurt?" He rose reproachfully, and made an experimental tour around his gums with his tongue. A terrible discovery was the result. . "Young man!" he shrieked, '"you've pulled out the wrong one." "I know," said the dentist, bracing himself again, "but now I can get at the other one handier!"
VETERAN TELLS OF WAR'S GEANDEST SIGHT. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
VETERAN TEXiS OF WAB'S GEANDE3T SIGHT. "The grandest sight of my war ex perience," declares a grizzled American veteran, "was during Gordon's sortie at Petersburg. The Union batteries on the flanks and rear of the breach made it so hot for Gordon that he sounded 'retreat.' But ihe getting out of a trap is the hardest part of >D. It was at tills crisis that 1 wi'uiessed that wonderful sight-a Confeda.'n'e officer on a white horse riding st the blazing cannon at full tilt. I stoixl near a gun in Fort Haskell wheih was doing moro than its sharo of slaughter when the commander of the battery called out to a knot of us, part of a ritlo company, 'Shoot tho snr.u on the white horsol" Uno niter another our best marksmen squyezed in botwecu the gun and the parapet wall and took aim through the embrasuro. Aft® seve ral had put in their shots the orderly sergcaiit tried it and cmr.o liaek nest fallen. Handing me his rihe, he ex claimed, with a. i&ugh 'Here, you, Vet I Fetch down tli...
Scandalous Corpulence. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
Scandalous Corpulence. The late American commander, General Shatter, although a man of corpulence, had a deep dislike for fat soldiers. .? "They're no use!" he would bluster in his tremendous basso. "They pant, they wheeze, they snort, they choku, they grunt, they groan, they waddle, they slouch through the world! Not a particle of good on earth, fat soldiers Would not have one of 'em if I could help it!" "Er-but-er-you would not exact ly call yourself slight, would you. colonel?" a major once asked Shat ter after one of these outbursts. "Slight? No!" Shatter thundered In reply. "I've been a fat old nui sance ever since the day I tipped the beam over two hundred pounds, and then I ought to have been court-mar tialled and cashiered for outrageous and malicious adiposity, sir-for scan dalous corpulence to the prejudice of military discipline!"
GROWING LUCERNE FOR SEED. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
GROWING LUCERNE FOR SEED. Owing to its high price, a good crop ef seed luoerno yields splendid re xurns to tlie grower, but in ordinary cases the crop is an uncertain on«. American experience in this regard is interesting, and the subject discussed in "Farmers' Bulletin," issued by the U.S. Department of .Agriculture. It has been found that the most success ful crops of seed are obtained whe« r relative shortage of soil moisture ac companies comparatively high tem peratures while the seed is maturing, i'he soil moisture, must bo suliicient to permit the setting of seed, but not great enough to start new vegetation lor the succeeding crop. "This nar row margin is the principal cause of tho great uccsrtainty in tiio lu>:erno 6eed crop." Tht ix.-st time to harvest was when the pea's ranged from straw colour to brown.
TOMMY SCORED. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
T.OMMY SCORED. They we:? at dinner, and Mr Gl'eon, Miii.v's .vmiHg 111:111, was dining with llioiii. it was tho fifth time he haa visited- them that week, and they were proa '.'!>* bored. -Mi'iv's hi-ollier sat next to her. eying tlio yon;:ji masher tip and down sus nici'.ms'y, for only the evening bofore lie had boxed Tommy's ears for being tuicy. Tommy was. now waiting for a i-!iai:eo to get eren. I'rosT.tly Mr. Green asked: "Mnv T help you to a liltlo mora fish; Milly?" "Xn, ilia::k you," replied Miss Milly. "Will you have some, Tommy?" "No, thanks," said Tommy, snap pishly. "Then I will," said the masher. "Do vni know. Tonrnv," lie went on, help ino- himself, "that you should alway* f>n&lt; of fisli, no matter what kind it is?" ' ,wi.v?" inquired Tommy. "lior'ause." said he, with a smile, "fish eiintniiis phosphorus, and phos phorus is Kond for tho brain." "Oh, i* is?" sneered Tommy, making for ihe donr; "theji you ought to eat a whaiol" '.What!" roared the maslier...
The Express. THURSDAY, AUGUST 13, 1914, The Great War of Nations. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
/;! r* Itp V 5V. i\ V y. THURSDAY, AUCUST i:S, 1914, The Grea'; War of Nations. AT the present time, when Great Britain is involved in the most perilous and the most stupendous enterprise she has ever undertaken for the maintenance of her prestige and power as the leading nation of the earth, it is only natural that minor events and happenings are looked upon .with scant considera tion. Keen interest in the coming elections, for instance, has sunk into utter indifference, whilst the arrival of the famous Knglish scien tists is a mere catspaw from across the over-ruffled sea. The fever of patriotism has spread throughout the length and breadth of the lim pire. We in Australia recognise with our Canadian brotherhood how deeply we are concerned not merely in the maintenance of the integrity of the greatest and freest Empire the world has ever known, and of which we take pride in being part and parcel, but also in the honorable fulfilment of a national pledge entered into with an ally. ...
TRICKS OF FURNITURE FAKERS. MAKING WORM-HOLES IN SHAM ANTIQUES. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
TRICKS OF FURNITURE FAKERS. MAKING WOKM-IiOLES IX SHAM ANTIQUE. Collectors of antique furniture need to be very wide avrnko nowadays if tlioy wish to protect themselves against the tricks practised by some dealers. Perhaps one of the cleverest dodges is that worked by the large and wealthy dealer with a good eii'.ento. Should a prominent and jutliKii> ial customer bo dissatisfied with his purchase, the d-ia Ier promptly off erf) to take it back and rofund the fuil pin-chase price. Indeed, 2m will go tuv.ner. and offer u price which allows --'.ic customer a profit on a transaction. But tho dealer is carei'.i, to take a rccoipt, and once he has got. this tiit-ro is nothing easier'than to oi for the article at a small profit to a millionaire collector from tlie States as lieiag front the collcction of Lord So aau-rfo. The bait usually is at once takan; the dealer laughing up his sleeve, i'1- le the American carries ho:;:a r.:s "bargain." -Many a spurious nnli&lt;;'.ss has be...
LOCAL AND GENERAL. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
LOCAL AND GENERAL. Cuuncu ot' ENGLAND.-The Oiiuroh of Eaglaud Synod of the W^garatta Diocese met at Wangaratta last week, when Bishop Armstrong presided. Mr T. AlUbr, J.P., and Mr J. A. II'irgravB at bended aa lay representa tives of Ihe.Tungamah and Yarra wonga churches reaped ively. The R:v Girdon Nelson WA3 nominated a3 rector of ih-s Yarrawonga parisli, and was unanimously elected. District adherents of the church are to bo c^ngra'.uliteJ on tho choice of the Synod. TUSGAMAII Siurb COUNCIL.- Noiiii n t'Ona for lho vacancies ciU3ed by the rrtirrni.int through expiration of time of O.iunciliors John F.-ll (Central Riding), Willi\m Deagan (Southern), Willbm Hodge (8:uth-\Vo3t), and A'tbur Wadeson (North West) cIo3->d on Tuesday list. No opposition was offered, aa was generally forecasted, to the return of either candidate, the ratepayers apparently b:;ing well satis God with tho present constitution of the counoil, under which tha machinery nf our local government ia running smo...
YARRAWONGA DISTRICT BORDER ASSOCIATION. Yurrawonga v. St James. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
YA11RA.YV0NGA DISTRICT BORDER ASSOCIATION. Yurrawong* v. St Jaraea, . Thn matoh botweon the above teams lust Saturday, played on the St Jauiea ova!, proved iuosb exciting. In the opening quarter the visitors worked with determination, and the Saints were continually hard pressed. For tbe term Yarn scored 1 °oil 2 behind3 to oil. Almost a similar stale of Biege was in evidence during the sccond quarter, at the conclusion of which the scores read Yarrawonga, 2 goals 3 behinds ; St James, 1 behind. The third quarter saw the local's star in the aseendancy, and in. a remarkably short space of time the Saints lud wiped out the deficiency, winding up the term with a lead of three points. Yurrawonga opened (he Glial quarter with an attack on their opponent's citadel, and after some finessing in front of the posts a goal was obtained, followed by a minor. Another behind to each side witnessed I ho conclusion of the game, tba final scores reading -Yarrawongn, 3 goals 7 hehiuds; St JameB, 3 go...
DISTRICT NEWS. YOUANMITE [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
DISTRICT NEWS. YOUANMITE (From Our Correspondent) The Roman Catholic B ill hold in Mr M. Shiels' barn on Wednesday last, was a hoga success. In fact, ibfre was so much of a company tint it dvncing under difficulties. fTpvpnh lesp, the dancing continued uotill an early hour next morning. Yabba Coursing Club are holding their course on Friday and Siturd-«y. As yet, the weather conditions «re not) quite favorable, but wiih a littIp rain in the early part of the wefk, it should then prove a great success. On Saturday, The Katamatite foot lnller3 play Muckitah on the Ut.inr'4 .jround This will be " the match of the season," a3 when they met fi-s the Katamatile team was weak, but is now greatly strengthened by several new players.
FOOTBALL. POSITION OF CLUBS. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
FOOTBALL. 'OSITION OF CLUBS. Wilby Association. Club. Wilby Tuny.imah " Telford Lake Kowiui , Bumluloug Varruwongu Association. St James ...| 7 MulwnU ... G lienallu ... j 6 Yarrawonga...' 7 2 | 0 28 3 0 24 3 0 2-t 5 i 0 : 23 WILBY AND DISTRICT ASSOCIATION Tho surpri89 in the hom&lt;5-association on Saturday was the splendid fight put up by Lako Rowan against Wilby. Af:er a hard tussle for supre macy, the e-inip ended in a draw, each side scoring 2 goals 5 br hindp. Telford easily accounted for Bun d»lont', who are accepting their con tinued want of success with sportsman like equanimity. Saturday's scores were:-Telford, 4 goals 7 behinda; Bundalong, 2 behinds. Fixtures for Saturday:-Wi'by v, Tungamah, Bundalong v. LikoRownu, on the ground of tho first-named clubs. Tungamah will be represented on Saturday by Meyor, Warfe, Kennedy, Daly, R'dilly, Stevenson (2), Liwrance, Ludeuian (2), T. Harrington, Clark, Nelaen, A. Saunders, M'Intyre, Cross, Potter, B. Fell. Emergencies-1 0...
POULTRY AND DROUGHTS. [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
POULTRY AND DROUGHTS. Not many people know that the Victorian poultry industry produces twice the rtreuue that fruitgrowiug does. List year the yulue realised frotn poultry totalled £2,000,000, os against £1,000,000 obtained Erom fruit of every kind, including dried fruits. It is also certain that we are on the eve of an enormous expansion in the poultry industry, because we nre establishing an export trade in eggs and table fowls. When the consua was taken in 1911 there wc-re 1-H 000 owners of poultry in Victoria. Fowls numbered '1.000,000, "ducks 300,000, geese. 60.000, and turkeys 200,000 Since then the nnmbera have largely. incroa6ed, and, with a remunerative export Irade, will continue to increase. There is a big market in England for eggs and poultry. That) country im ports nvp.ry year eggs to the value of £S 000,000, of which only one-eighih of one per cent comes from the British dominion?. Russia ia the largest sender, rs eho does 2-1 per cout of the trade with England, and ...
BURRAMINE [Newspaper Article] — Tungamah and Lake Rowan Express and St. James Gazette — 13 August 1914
BUURAMINE Oa Wednesday evening of i^8t week a highly successful plain and fancy dresa ball was held in the Burr.imine Hall in aid of the funds of the Burra mino East Lawn Tennis Club. There was an exceptionally largo assemblage, including a number of visitors from Yarrawonga. The hull waa moat artistically decorated, and tho dancpre gyta'.ed merrily to the strains of in spiriting music provided by Messrs Ford Bros' orchestra, their evolutions baing diree'ed by Mr P. Quinine, who mtda »n efficient master of ccromonies. PrV.Oa were offered for i ho best fancy costumes for ladies and gents, and the task of adjudication was en'rustid to Or O'Doa and Meaers P. O'Ksne and J. Ford, whoaa de cisions met with univeis.il satisfaction. The first prize for the ladies was won by Miss E. Rohan, and Mr J. Gallivau wa3 the BuccfS3ful gentleman. About midnight suppsr (provided by Mr P. E'lis) wns bmded round, afsor which d-tneins «ms resumed nr-d continued wiih aiiiniHt;on uniii tlio "wee stna'" h'U...