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Quick Exit. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
Quick Exit. A man who had been very penuri ous died arid sought admission at the pearly gates. ' r "What have you ever done," aBked St. Peter, "that I should let you in?" "Once," said the man, "I met an old woman who was hungry and gave her twopence." "Gabriel, is that on the records?" "Yes, St. Peter." "What else have you done?" "Once I gave a frozen newsboy a penny." "Is that 011 the record, Qabrlel?" "Yes, St. Peter." "What else have you done?" "I can't rccollect anything else just now." "Gabriel, what do you think we ought to do with this fellow?" "Oh, give him back his three cop pers and tell him to go back to the other place."
A Hint. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
A Hint. "Dearest," he babbled, "tho very stars shine In your eyes; tho ruby ^rldesccs In your lips; tho lily palely rests upon your brow; tho Sun throw's' Its light-shafts from your tresses; "Walt n minute, Clarence," she in terrupted, "what I really want you to see is a diamond flashing from my third finger on my left hand, and some lay I want to hear a gold band play ing there. Now go on with your gush!"
Made Up in Quantity. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
Made Up In Quantity. An old woman, who had grown grey and bent' In the service of the family who had raised her from childhood, was not gifted with, an over-abundance of grey matter, and her mistakes and 'queer ideas furnished much amuse ment to those about her. One day a Yorkshire pudding that si e had made for dinner did not seem quite as it should be, and the mistress i called Eunice and said, "What is the I matter with the pudding, Eunice? Did you make It In the usual way?" "Yesm'm," said Eunice. . "How many eggs did you put in It?" "Six." "Six!" exclaimed the mistress; "why, the recipe only calls for four!" "Yesm'm, I know," said Eunice; "but they weren't very good, bo I put in more of 'em."
Immaterial. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
Immaterial. A Northerner riding through the West Virginian mountains came up with a mountaineer leisurely driving a herd of pigs. "Where are you driving the pigs to?" asked the rider. . "Out to pasture 'em a ibit." "What for?" "To fatten em." "Isn't it pretty slow work to fatten 'em on grass? Up where I come from' we pen them up and feed them on corn. It saves a lot of time." "Yaas, 1 s'pose so." drawled the mountaineer. "But what's time to a liawg, anyway?"
A Smart Boy. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
A Smart Boy. A country Bergeant, anxious for a case, one day left on patrol. On'his way he met a cow and a calf grazing on the roadside. In tho distance he eaw a little boy coming along. The sergeant stopped him, and said: "Tell me, my good boy, do you know who owns this cow and calf?" "No, sir." said the little boy; "I don't know who owns the cow; but I know who owns the calf." "Who?" said the sergeant. "1 should say the cow, sir."
Incomplete. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
Incomplete. A clergyman's wife recently ad dressed a meeting of slum housewifes on their home duties. The address .made the home life seem very fine and Ideal. One housewife present, however, said the vicar's wife did not go far enough to help her. Said she: "She's all right as far as she goes; but what I'd like to ask is this: What would she do if the old vicar came home on pay night with hia envelope empty, and wanted to fight her?"
THE ROMANCE OF SILVER Wonderful Tale of the Comstock Lode Which Outrivals the Wildest Fiction. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
THE ROMANCE OF SILVER Wonderful Tale of the Comstock Lode Which Outrivals the Wildest Fiction. Thoro is no fiction doallng with tho finding of trcnsure which can com pare with tho plain facts concerning the Comstock Lodo. Tho wonderful caves of Aladdin pale into insignifi cance before .tho treasures held In California's "Snowy Range," the Sier ra Nevada. A few barren acres of that sterllo land have yielded far greater troasures than any similar area in tlio world, for tho rocks were practically masses of silver. That great ledge of silver, tho Corn stock Lode, drove wild thu Imagina tion of tho coolest, and mon went mad from the very existence of the unfath omable treasure. The Big Bonanza, alone, for threo years yielded £600,000' i\ month, and as the depth of the mines increased, so did th'e wealth. As the shafts went down tho ore was found deopor and wider than be fore, until at last tho depths became too hot for human existence, and the levels became filled with sulphurous stoam,...
Congenial. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
Congenial. He had been going from church to church trying to find a congenial con gregation, and finally he stopped In a little church just as the congregation read with the minister: "Wo have left undone those things which wo ought to have done, and we have (lone those things which we ought not to have done." The man dropped Into a pew with a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness," he said, "I've found my crowd at laBt." : The true way to be humble 1b not to stop till thou art smaller than thy s If, but to stand at thy real height against some higher nature that shall show thee what the real smallnees of thy greatness 1».
A BROTHER'S LOVE Published by arrangement with Cassell & Co. All Rights Reserved. CHAPTER XV. Tarnished Honor. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
A BROTHER'S LOVE By GRAHAM BROWN, ■ Author of "Tho Soul o» Luclllo," "Tho Leaguo of tho Sacrcd Scarab," oto. Published by nrrangoinont with Cassoll & Co. - All Rights Rosorvtt). CHAPTER XV. .Tarnished Honor. When Nellie Charlton opened her oyes again she found herself sitting In the arm-chair, and the man's face was close to liers. The muscles of hlB face w§ro working spasmodically, ana very gently lie stroked the dark hair from her brow. 5 "Oh, Douglas, Douglas!" sho cried, "why aro you here? Have you boon here all the time? Have you listen ed—oh, do not kill me! Havo mercy!" Ho looked at her with a glanco which was linlf-kind, lialf-scornful, "Nellie," ho said. ."I could havo kill ed you—I could , havo killed him. But I'm not mad now. I want to plead with you. It you will hear me, It is not too late," and ho stretched his trembling hand forward. "Oh, keep back! keep back, you in famous wretch," sho screamed, ns she ' sprang to the other side of tho room. "You may kill me b...
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
DR. H. A. EMBLING BEQ3 to announce lliat he lifts sue ccsdcil to the urnolice fcrnerl. oirtied un In conjunction with Dr. A. 'V Riudrr, and may be consulted ft! usual at his residence, Korong Vale. ^ UODRS.—Morning— Before 10 a.m. ; Mid-daj—1 p.m to 2.30 p.m. ; Evening— 0 p.m. to 7,30 p.m. Public Viceinationa :—Friday.", from 3 p.m. to 4.30 p.m, Or, Embling will also visit ilORUN'O every THURSDAY, at 2 p,ra. Dr.Gr.Unwin Taylor ^bgatcinn niti) i?itrtjcan, MAY be consulted nt his NEW RESI DKNCE, Wilson-street Wcddetlmrn (next the Church ot England vienrngp.) . LOCAL ■VISITING FIXTURES, DIt. TAYLOR visits Korong Vale every Tuesday and Friday irom 2 to 4 p m, DtJ. J, Allen's residence. WjcMiella : Every Wednesday, fiom 9p.tr., at Mornlee'a Hotel IT WILL COST YOU J(JST ID. T0 "Forster" The Jeweller, c2ol 4 SMITH ST. COLLINGWOOD, Melt). KEEP IT IN THE "Thirteen years ago, when I lived in Smeaton, two of my child ren suffered terribly with ASTHMA, but three or four bottles of HEARNE'S BRON...
CHAPTER XVII. The Crumpled Letter. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
CHAPTER XVII. -- I The Crumpled Letter. Eric Galbralth, his startled eyes glaring fires of hate, drew back has tily,, jind with a face suffused with a blush of shame, entered the house. For a moment Elsie looked at him atf if she had seen a ghost, then with a g\ad little cry ran to his arms, and was looked in his embrafce. Eric could not truBt himself to utter, a word, but kissed the upturned ■■(ace; . 'si He glanced round the room, but. An gus had gone,- and they were alone. "Are you—are you glad to • see me, dfear?" asked Elsie, her voice pantln'K with the intensity of her emotion. "What a silly question to ask," he replied, ovaslvely. And onco more ho kissed hor on tlio lips. ■But though thoro was no lack of apparent fervor in his caresses, he could not docolvo Elsie. Like many' anothor man bofore him, he funded that a soft word, a tendor kiss, would ho enough to satisfy the love of the most exacting of womon, and lie had not yet learned that when a girl loves as Elsie loved him,...
CHAPTER XVI. Eric at the Window. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
CHAPTER XVI. Eric at the Window. "Clank-clank-clanlc!" The North express thundered on through the darkness of night. After a short'stop1 at Edinburgh Eric Galbralth found' himself speeding northward as the dawn broke—grey and dreary. On, on, on, the train sped relent lessly, and with a shock lie saw the broad expanse of the North Sea clear, and limpid and shimmering; and the familiar brown-sailed boats dotted the silvery surface. Far down at tho foot of the cliffs he saw the restless waves crash inwards among the green glis tening rocks. He held his breath in the intensity of this new emotion, The sea was calling, calling. The sea was pleading, pleading. He heard the words as he sped along, "Welcomo back among us, oh, tliou who lovest the 'Flower o' the Sea.' We love her, too, we slilg to her, cooing softly; we whisper to her that you are coming." He started and looked down. The very waves seemed exulting In Joy. "Flower o' the Sea, our darling." • It: was the name by which, In the ...
CHAPTER XVIII. The Lie. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 18 July 1914
CHAPTER XVIII. The Lie. : Eric Galbraith took the tattered let ter in, his hand, and his heart beat with the violence of apprehension. "Has somebody been writing?" he eald.hoarsely, but when he saw that it Wwat! his own letter his face cleared. "Oh, Elsie," he said, kindly, "I was deuced busy when I wrote that. You have i no idea how . stiff the work Is. And I must study havd it I am to win . "I know, I .know, Eric," she .said, "i only want to hear you say you for give me." "Of course ' I do, dear," lie said, "and now that you liavs got the old Eric himself you do not want this';" tato the flrePI)Sd th® °rUmplo(1 lotter For a long time they sat talkine and at last Elsie said, "Now I must go to mother. Aren't you glad she Is so much better?" "Yes, dear," ho answorod, rising. Do you know where Angus-has slip ped off to?" "Ho may bo at the boat. You must try and cheer him up.' There seems ■ ,son'otlilng weighing on his mind. ho 11 bo all right as Boon as the fishing season comes round ...
SAYINGS OF TO-DAY AND YESTERDAY. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 25 July 1914
SAYINGS OF TO-DAY AND YESTERDAY. Tho only principle about some peo ple is to make principal without prin ciple—Sam Mentz. 'TIb better to have loved- and lost th'an never to have loBt at all.—George Ade. When you cri.tlciBe a man he Is first takjn aback, and then' he takes af front.—'W. Tallman. Some folks are like rocklng-ch&lrf— full o£ taotion without proiresu.—Es telle I^laudor. A cannibal king recently sent post haste for his doctor "Good gracious, man," the doctor said, "you're In a dreadful stato. What have you been eating?" " Nothing," groaned the sick man, "oxcept a slice of that multi-million aire whoso ynclit was wrecked on Cocoanut Reef." "Merciful powers!" the doctor cried. "And 1 told you undor no circum stances to oat anything rich. George, get the sawa and axes. We must operato at once." "I'm sorry to confess It," says Madame Jolre, one of Paquin's repre sentatives, "but the bodice which makes the most liberal revelations are going to continue popular for a lo...
A TOUGH SITUATION. A Gambler's Story. [Newspaper Article] — Korong Vale Lance and North West Advertiser — 25 July 1914
A TOUGH SITUATION. A Gambler's Story. "The toughest situation I was ever In," said a young man who lives by his wits, "wa3 when I went into a Sixth-avenue gambling-den in New York, and began to play, roulette on' a bluff. It was the most desperate mo ment of my life. I hadn't a cent in my pocket, and I had to have one hun dred dollars at once, or else—well, I had to have that hundred. I turned into the Sixth-avenue place, and went up the three narrow flights of stairs to the room where the tables were. There were a few hard-looking men playing at the wheel, one or two were sitting in at the faro game, and a pok er party was at. work in one corner. "As I glanced round, I noticed, sit ting all alone in a chair tipped against the wall, an old white-haired man with kind blue eyes. He looked at me quizzically through the smoke of his cigar. "X saw that the man keeping the roulette-wheel was just about flipping the marble. I stepped up quickly to the table, and as the marble went spin nin...