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AMUSING INCIDENTS. A Unique Subscription. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
AMUSING INCIDENTS. ' A Unique Subscription. Dean Iole told a capital story of John Bright, A witty anid 1ersistent clergyman was ul'ging MIr, Bright to subscribe towards rebuilding his church, and got the natural reply that, as a Quaker, Bright could hardlly be expected to give for the purpose, The clergyman replied that the building miust be )ullEd down lirst, and that Pyerhalps he would like to sub scribe to that Ipart of the process, Ac. cordingly, Mr. Bright subscribed £10.
MAGISTERIAL INQUIRY. TERANG, Friday. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
MAGISTERIAL INQUIRY, TER.N-I;, Friday, A magisterial Inquiry was held thii morning before Mr. J. Bradahaw, JP, ooncerning the death of Eliot Shannon, Mrs, Shaln?on stated that when a milt from Toiang the stotlrng geoar of tho oal wont wrongI, and her husbnnd appleld tii, brako, but It seemed to have little or un effoot. Theo air bocimno uinmanaogeable ran Into tho fence, And turned over on hei husband. She wot for help, CGorgeo Il'Pey gIvo evideico regardallll tho fi?.ding of thlo c.u'i Ith deo'lvesd pilinned boneath It, and the gotl?og of help to rue move the body, Dr. Weir stated that there wAs ev ldrno of friatutlr of the hasu of Ihe Akull ,and of Injurtie to Ila hehat. Doath wtas due to those IIjuriflOesB, A verdlot was rett'ordld t1 hat deathi re. aulted from Injuriou roeived in a motor cir acoldent and no blame was attachablu to aniyono, [Wo are Indobted to the 'Tuoran " 11x. press " for thle above purliulJailI
A Mark of Nationality. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
A Mark of. Nationality, Sir David Gill, tihe famous astrono. mor, was once emllhasising the extra ordinary care and minuteness withl which astronomical observatious were taken. One observation, he said, was rather similar in its extreme minuteness to attempting to see the hundredth part of the diameter of a threepenny-bit that was a mile away. "One can see that you're a Scots man," retorted one of his hearers. "Nobody else would bother about the hundredth part of a threepenny.bit a mile away!"
A Poor Congregation. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
A Poor Congregation, Mr, Robert Ford, who has just pub lished a delightful book entitled "This tledown," tells an amniusing story of a clergyman who stood for some time one Monday morning watching a man fishing for trout in a Scotch stream, "I'm a fisher, too," remarkeiT the minister in the course of conversation, adding rather unctuously: "But a fisher of m ,en." "Aye," was the dry retort of the angler, "I had a peep into your creel yesterday, Ye didna' seem to hae catched many!"
The Etiquette Book. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
The Etlquette Book. "Madam," he began, as the door opened, "I-am 'selling a new book on 'Etiquette and Deportment,'" "Oh, .you are," she responded. "Go down there on the grass and clean the mud off your feet!" "Yes'm, As I was saying, ma'am, I amn sel---" "Take of your hat; Never address a strange lady at her door without re moving your hat! "Yes'm. Now, then, as I was say ing-" "Take your hands out of your poc kets! No gentleman ever carries his hands there." "Yes'm. Now, maam, this work on "Throw away your pipe, 'If a gen tleman uses tobacco he is careful not to disgust others by the habit." "Yes'm. Now, ma'am, in calling your attention to this valuable-" "Walt! Put that dirty handkerchief out of sight, and use less grease on your hair in thie future.. Now you look a bit decent, You have a book on 'Etiquette. and Deportment,' Very well. I don't want it, I am only the servant-girl, Go up the steps to the. front door, and talk with the lady of the house. She called me a down right, ...
ST. ARNAUD POLICE COURT. FRIDAY, MAY 15. (Before Mr. D. Berriman, P.M.) DEBT. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
ST. ARNAUD POLIOE COURT. - FRIDAY, MAY 15. (IMBfor Mr. D. Burrimau, P.M.) DElf'. W, , Q Q.ick v Jam1,a Ootter orriage on goods, 2/6 -An amount of 7/i had been p idl into o0 ,t, and an order was made for the amount claimed with 5/ ooutti, LAN)D T'AX AUSMiiNT' Jan. E, Martin, an oftir of the OomnionwealthI Ooimisiuioner of Land Tax v. Morrik Willitamn, for failin" to furniuh ia rIturn under the Lind T',x Asses'Bment Act,.-Mr, Dntkley, in. t ructrd by thoe (otnmnweal, lt Soliitor, atisked thut the onao b!! with. diaw,-.- -rnntied. W A'i1I CASTLi T'ho., Smlnitd, turnootckr of the 8,. Arnaud Bl3rough Water Truit v, Thee, H. Tracey, for allowing water to run to waste on 13,bh April...-D.efndant aidl be pleaded guilty, buh waut not vuilty. Hle unipps)ed el o was re.potn. Oiblo for an coident,.-Mr, Dunley, who a)pptardl for thl Trusrt stated that owing to icarotty of watter, ocrtlin regulationsi wero framed atid advprtiorfd. Ont EIaler Monday, Traceqy was using water fromi thu Goldlielda re...
A "Weekly" Story. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
A 'Weekly" Story. A maiden with a lot of Mon. Was much beloved by everyone. She had a lisp, quite fetching, Tue., And crowds of "chappies" came to woo, But only one she cared to Wed., And. when he asked her to, she said: "Oh, yetth, I will right gladly, Thur." Nor did she dally or demur. "Can'st cook?" her lover asked, "Oh, myl" She answered, "I can bake and Fri." Then down her lover promptly Sat. And signed her up to run his flat, P.S.-Whien fifty weeks and two were done, That happy couple had a Sun,
RECHABITES. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
RECOHABITES, There wae a good attendrlnoo atb the quarter!y mooting of the looal Recha. bitse Lodge on Teehday night, reo, A. E Jhnkinu, CR, proeciding, One ,loarenoo was granted to tho \lildlUra Ton1 b Bro I. J, T, Grigg wae ap. pointed oorreeponding ouperintoendent of Junior Tent ; aund Bro, R, J, Noleon, now residing in Melbourne, w?n ap. pointed to repreeenub the local 'Tlonb t the ])ietricb Oouuoncil meotinge, The olection of oflicre resulted :--h0bief Rulor, B3ro, A, E1. Jenkline (ro olruted); Deputy Rluloer, Bro, C, ,Moe; Past Chiof lRuler, BIro, A. E, Walch (e?. ldeoted); seoretary, ,Bro. obahnnu Fi'owlor (ro olected); broeneuror, lro, F, E. Davioe (roeole~ td); writing ctow erd, Bro, I, W, Golding; moneny ?oowardr, lro I , T. (rigg (re. elected; levite, BIro. J, Sandercock (re. olooted); auditore, ilrog, G, W, 8, Mattbowe and E C ilolmco ; ouperin. tondenle Juvoenilo Tent, Bro. I. J, T, (lrigg end A, E, Jenkin. The escore tary reported that arrangemente were aboub completed...
Not So Green As He Looked. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
Not So Green As He Looked. A man with a wifo who has her own ways abolut doing things is lucky enough to catch her now and then. "My dear," he said the other morn. nlg as he was dressing, "I think you were right when you told me last night that there were burglars in the houlle," S"lWhy?" she aslked nervously. "Because all the money that I had in my pockets when I went to bed is gone," "Weoll," she said, with an I-told.you. so air, "if you had been bravo and got up and shot the wretch you wouldl have had your money this morn ing." "Possibly, my dear, possibly," he said. "But If I had done so I would have been a widower." She laughed softly then and gave half of It back to him,.
Shocking Fatality. MR. ELIOT SHANNON THE VICTIM. CRUSHED UNDER A MOTOR CAR. DURING HONEYMOON TRIP. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
8hocking Fatality, M., ELIOT ISHANNON 'ITHE VIOTIM, ORI1JSHID "UND1~Ilt A MOT''OR1 (JAR, DOURINGX HONEYMOON TRIP, A dreadfiully shocking accident, nvolving the death of Mr, Ollot fJ, hannon, ausooiatod wtii the well knowni rtm of Me as, Straoliha, Murray, and hannon, woolhrokera, of (eelonl, courritd tuear TIerai g on 'l'hursdlay reornoon. The circumstaonce have a rep nandsadsitiliieanor, nriot only for iecausrd'u own reolativea, but alueo for Mr. A. B. Blulclhy, J.P],, Mr, IBlakhlry, and family, of S1, Arnaud. bwaa only on .[tireday evening laust tihat M, thannon, in the full bloorm of healtb, was united in the holy IondA of matrimony at Chriab Ohurch, St. rnaund, to Miss li as ic Blakeley, dlughtier of Mr, anod Mr, BIlAk ley, The poun!arity of the young couple and tohe esteem in which they were held wa. tontified toby tht' great Urowd which saur niblcd to witness thi ceremony, The church was packed, and quitu a nuimber of people were dicappoin ted at being un. aMble to giin admitt...
Half and Half. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
Half and Half. An old womlan of tremenodous size h:iled a tranicar, and with conhider. able dllflculty managed to climb up and got a seat insuide. When she was coimfortably sottled, she looked around at a manI seated beside her, and said with great vigor: 'If you'd been 'art a man, you'd 'a' 'elped me hupa!" The llalllil giave aI wly smile and rellied, "If yeou 'ad only beeon 'arf the woman you are, I might 'ave 'tad a try,"
MINING ITEMS. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
MIVINIG IT'EMS, S, Ariiaud Ncrth (O, , 0o, NIay 15,-];qi ,?n, runniuig wi l, D) layid oruasthig owin to required alt?rationu in lhaftin nd p? 1 Iulleyu to obtain niecei. onry ~lpeed for concontratilug tiiblee, Saonlo.brcaking below proceding l?as unuIl; gld allowing hi fac0,
THE SENATE CANDIDATES. SATURDAY, MAY 16, 1914. THE SENATE CANDIDATES. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
THE SENATE OANDIDATES, Txm selection of Liberal candidates for the Senate at the coming elections in one that may be heartily commended to tho people of Victoria, The choosing hae been done in a manner that no one can cavil at, I~s results will be loyally accepted, Perhaps thn one fault of the completed liot is that a larger representation of country interests would have boon deoirablo. But country condidates neoessarily suffer from the fao that they do not command on wide a porsonal following as those whoos homes are in the metropolis, It is to be noted that all the purely country nominations are well down the list, with the exopption of Senator M'Uoll and Mr. M'Lcan, both of whom are well known through. out the length and breadth of the State, Thoseo who have been unsuccessful will, however aocopt their fato with good will, Turning to the candidates who havo boon seolocted it must be admitted that the team is a strong one, whether looked at as one with which to fight the olections...
MULGA JACK. WRONG MAN ARRESTED. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
MULGA JAOK, WRONG 1MAN AURESTED, YuVearday?' Miaryborough " Adver tiser " sIys :-In September of last year, George HenII ry Sparrow, of Olon. leigih, in the Wesbcrn distriot, had stolen fromi him seven heifers, two cows, a horse, sad(dle and bridle, The theft was not obeeted hblues to anyone, hub a week or so ago the police arrested Louis Macokay, knowu as " Mulga Jack, in conneali u with the matter, just bas he had completed a senlonoo o[f throo weeks in the Mary borough gaol for cruelty to a horse at Sb, Arnaud, Accused was brought beforn Mr, A, G, Smith, J P,, and re maunded for a work, bail being fixed iu two sureties of £100, These weore nIot forthooming, and Mackay has been imprisoned while awaiting the arrival of the Informant to identify himn, Mr., Sprrow arrived on Wednesday, and, to the nurprise oi thebo polico, announced that to accused was nob tihe man wanted In aonneotion with the rob bery, Accordingly, Mackay was brought boleoro Mr, Smith again on Thursday and diocharg...
The Very Latest. Melbourne, Friday Evening. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
The Very Latest. -- - 9- 4-·-.-· Melbourno, .'rlday Evening, Whea,--Tha murket is uOnsettled and weak, The naominal quote iv 3/103 alongsido, Liverpool cables a sliht advanioc, Flour, £9, O0st, 1/11l; foed, 1/10. Ohaff, £8/10 IHay, £4/10 to ,£, Potatoees, £4/0lO to £4/15. Onions, £0/1l, 'The steam, r Iriehman has arrived with 500 immigrantsl. Sixty are for Victoria, and the balance for Now South Wales,, A retlun tabled bIy the Minister for Honme Afhlra sbows that £1,895,000 has already been spont on the trans. continental railway, The fi:t of Bruooe and I Roberta has been fined £5 for solling oats oontain. ing foreign matter, A large pi' co of wood was placed on the railway line at R osedald. It is believed to be an attempb to wreck a train, The obstruction was pushed asido by tbhe ongine.o, A messagoe of welcome was sent byh the IFederal Government to the new Governor.General, and a reply bao boon received convoying thanks for the welcome. Mr. W., T 'l'horden, a lioancial expert an...
A Wise Precaution. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
A Wise Precaution, Two seamen-an Irishman and a Scotsman-had been breaking leave and had been ordered to receive ten strokes of the "'cat," They had pre viously held very good characters, and,. taking this into consideration, the captain said that if they wished to wear anythling to protect their backs a little they might do so, The Scotsman replied that he would like to have a strip of canvas on his back, and this request was granted, "What would you like to have, Pat?" asked the captain, turnings~ to the second seaman,. "Shure, sir," was the reply, "If it's all the same to you, I'd like to have the. Scotsman: on my back!"
A Persuasive Tongue. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
A Persuasive Tongue, At school in Cornwall, Mr. Rudyard Kipling, never a brilliant scholar, was known as "Glgs" (i,e., "gig-lamps," meaning spectacles), and was esteem. ed because he won the confidence of an austere spinster who kept the lo. cal tuckshop, with the help of three cats. She hated the collego youths; grudgingly took their cash, and stern. ly denied them credit. But "Gigs" went round one day, and, while his companlons were bursting with sub dued laughter, he blandly "talked cat" to the old lady, and succeeded in win ning her confidence to such an extent that his name-the only one-was placed on her books.
In Trouble Again. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
In Trouble Again, Traveller (to an Irishman): Well, Mike, I see you have a small garden, "Yes, sorrl" "What are you going to set in it for next season?" "Nothing, sorr, I set it with pota. toes last year, and not one of them came up," "That's strange, How do you ex. plain it?" "Well, sorr, the man next door to me set his garden full of onions," "Well, had that anything to do with your potatoes not growing?" "Yes, sorr, Bedad, them onionswas that strong that my potatoes couldn't see to grow for their eyes water. Ingl"
PERMIT TO REMARRY. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
PERMIT TO REMARRY, Because he has lived "a uniformly good life" for at least five years, Mr. Charles R, Pelgram, a millionaire silk manufacturer of Paterson, a town six. teen miles from New York, is to be allovwed to remarry, A divorce decree granted against him in 1893 contained a ban on his remarriage. Mr., Pelgram has success? flily applied to have it lifted, under the provisions of the new Domestic Relations law, which insists that a divorced husband must live a good life for five years before remarrying, Three well-known business men swore that Mr. Pelgram had fulfilled the conditions of the law, and the mil lionaire himself said that he had been following simple life rules for twenty years, He was married at nineteen,
HONEYMOON TRAMPS. [Newspaper Article] — St Arnaud Mercury — 16 May 1914
HONEYMVOON TRAMPS, The averago bride when she changes her orange blossoms and her resplendent wedding dress for the more prosaic travelling costume, does not usually have to prepare for such a journey as that undertoken by Mr., and Mrs, Grantham, ot Alberta, After walking 7000 miles and being held up a dozen times, Norman Grant. ham, of Calgary, who, with hils bride, formerly Miss Mabel Ryan, of Minne apolls, startedl last spring on a honey. moon tramp around the world, is back in Calgary for a tihnoe. Mrs, Grantham's health broke down when the trampcrs reached Brindis, on the Mediterranean, forcing the temporary abandonment of the trip. Mr. Grantham will irecsume the jour. ney at once, as soon as his wife's health is restored, Mr.i, Grantham returns with a whole some respect for the ability of Eng lish pedestrians, He triel to break the record of ten hours and two min. utes from London to Dover--sixty. eight miles; but the best he could do was eleven hours and twenty-one min utes.<...