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A Strong Defense. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
A Strong Defense. The colonel of the attacking party faced the commander-in-chief. “General,” he hotly cried, “I wish you would call up the peace conference at once. The conduct of the enemy is a disgrace to civilized warfare. I simply can't get my veterans to meet them at close quarters.” “What seems to be the trouble, colonel?” The chief inquired. “Why, half the men of- their line of defense have been eating garlic and the other half limburger.”—Cleveland Loader.
liCmc Majesty. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
liCmc Majesty. The Daily Thunderbolt reporter who sometimes dropped into verse invaded th« lair of the real poet of the staff. “Rondelle,” he said, “I’m lost for a word. Let me look at your rhyming dictionary a moment.” “Rhyming dictionary!” exclaimed the real poet. “Sir!”
THE MAN BEHIND THE GUN. Only Recently Did He Become o* Importance In the Navy, [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
THE MAN BEHIND THE GUN. Only Recently Did He Become o* Importance In the Navy, It is only in recent years, says a United States ordnance officer, that the training of our navy men in marksmanship received adequate attention. But since the Spanish-American war the improvement in marksmanship has been enormous, and now the man behind the gun is recognized as the most important factor in the efficiency of a war vessel. Now, too, everything gives way to target practice and the one thing that a commander is more interested in than anything else is the record that ins men can score at the ranges. But, just to illustrate the difference between the old days and now. I was junior officer on the Essex many years ago. In those days we had target practice once a quarter —were forced by regulations to expend so many rounds of ammunition every three months, and, well, that was about all there was to it. Jt was a perfunctory kind of practice, and every one was glad when it was over. One day we wen...
M> v>-i‘ ci :>''oeity. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
M&gt; v&gt;- i\‘ ci :&gt;''oeity. Cauiiibai Queen Wrll. go'.al-by, dear. I’m going to i;i; sca 1 ;;g meeting. Cannibal King What charitable work is the meeting engaged upon now? * Cannibal Queen - V.'e are making high-necked drcssc-; for the poor society women of Guidon.—London TitBits.
No Wonder. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
No Wonder. Mike —How foine th’ polacemin in th’ park look! Pat —An’ phoy not? Don’t aich wan hov' a nurse? —Judge. _ On June 30, 1906, the total singletrack railway mileage in the United States was 234,363.17 miles, or 6,262.10 miles more than at the end of the previous year. An English minister says that Londoners are developing into a race of dwarfs owing to smoking and riding in tramways. The value of the property guarded by the London police is estimated at $4,500,000.000. The life of the modern battleship is put down at 15 years.
PROGRESS OF THE HA». [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
PROGRESS OF THE HA». Brandy is al&gt;out 50 per cent alcohol. New South Wales has no work houses. The Simplon tunnel still holds the record for length. The first gummed postage stamp was issued about 1840. The tropical seas contain the greatest percentage of salt. Colombo has four tides daily, and Malta has none at all. The Salvation Army is operating in fifty-four countries and colonics. The earth's atmosphere varies from 120 to 200 miles in depth. The blind population of the world numbers sixty-four out of every million. Smoking tobacco is now dispensed from penny-ln-the-slot machines in London. Some of the ice fields of Greenland are said to be a mile ami a half in thickness. Siberia, long regarded as a barren country, »s now producing a great deal of foodstuffs. Owing to a shortage in small coins, seven tons of pennies were turned out in a single day by an English mint. Three hundred Berlin streets are planted with 44,000 trees which are said to represent a value of $190...
UNFAMILIAR FACTS. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
UNFAMILIAR FACTS. Nine out of every ten books pubilsheo are novels. The value of the world’s railways is calculated at $27,775,000,000. The average man —not the exceptional Sandow—can lift but 225 pounds. Over 750,000 barrels of American apples are exported every year to England. It Is stated that a chamelon which is blind loses its power of making itself of the same hue as Its surroundings. It Isn’t very hard for one Chinaman to insult a friend by mistake. There are 1.000 Chinese words that have each ten different meanings. A “ten-penny” nail means that one thousand nails weigh ten pounds. The word “penny” in this case Is a corruption of pound. A cableway being built in Turkestan is the greatest enterprise of the kind in the world. It will carry coal a distance of 140,000 yards over a route with gradients of 2,000 meters. It Is proposed to build a motor approach road to London, » distance of fifteen miles, with a width of forty to sixty feet. The highest gradient Is 1 to 30. It wil...
PROVERBS AND PHRASES. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
PROVERBS AND PHRASES. Beauty is a blossom. —Latin. God resists the proud.—Bills. Gifts persuade even the gods.—Greek. Fools grow without watering.—ltalian. Every one bears his own cross.— Latin. Economy Is the mother of liberty.— Johnson. Economy Is the poor man’s mint. — Tupper. Follow close the fame of your fathers.—lrish. Beware of no man more than thyself. —Terence. Fly the pleasures which bite tomorrow. —German. Better go around than fall into the ditch. —German. Jesters must be content to taste of their broth. —Latin. Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.—Moore. Just praise is only a debt, but flattery Is a present.—French. In time of trials It Is the duty of all good citizens to take a side. —Latin. It is easier to subdue the first desire than to satisfy Its followers.— French.
Ho Wouldn’t Do. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
Ho Wouldn’t Do. Elder (discussing the new minister’s probation discourse —In my opeenlon he wasua justified in dividing folk Into the sheep and the goats. I wadna just say, Jamie, that I was among the unco guid, an' 1 wadna say that you were among the uuco bad. So whar do we come in? He’ll not do for us, Jamie. We’ll no vote for him.
Beneacent Warning. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
Beneacent Warning. “But,” protested the Plain People “you are robbing us.” “Suppose I am,” responded the Trust, iinplently; “if you stop me it will bring on a panic, and then where will you be? —Puck. The temperature of countries with sandy soils Is higher than those with clay or other compact soils-
Might Make a Hit. [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
Might Make a Hit. The Manager—l've got a new Idol for a melodrama that ought to make I hit. The Writer —What is it? The Manager—The idea Is to intro* duce a cyclone in the first act that will kill all the actors.—Harper’l Weekly. In Madagascar there is a natural for* tress with precipitous walls 1,000 feet high. The only moans of access is a sub* terranean passage. It is argued that the compulsory adoption of the incandescent system of electric lighting in irihies will greatly cut down the death roll During the past year the export* of this country have grown greatest in the Items of cars, carriages and automobiles. Algerian vineyards produce more grapes per acre than those of any other country. The coal mines of the world employ 1,250,000 men.
Page 4 Advertisements Column 1 [Newspaper Article] — Lompoc Journal — 18 April 1908
Peculiar to Itself In combination, proportion and process, Hood s - Saisaparilla is therefore ‘Peculiar to Itself in merit, sales and cures. It is made from the best blood-purifying, alterative and tonic ingredients by such original and peculiar methods as to retain the full medicinal value of each and all. The severest forms of scrofula, salt rheum, catarrh, rheumatism, dyspepsia, and debility are cured every day by Hood’s Sarsaparilla Sold by druggists. 100 doses si. Begin to take it today. _ . For those who prefer 1 same curative properties as the liquid form, besides SarSataDS medicine in tablet ! accuracy of dose, convenience, economy,there form Hood's Sarsaparilla is now put up in choco- | being no loss by evaporation, breakage, or leakage, lated’tablets called Sarsatabs, as well as in the i Sold by druggists or sent promptly by mail, usual liquid form. Sarsatabs have identically the i C. I. Hood Co.. Lowell. Mass. LINGERIE WAIST You’ll like it. Best Persian Lawn. Made tosell ...