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A LOOK OUT. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
A LOOK OUT. Wife (from tho window, at 1 a.m., to tipsy husband) : ' Well, what's your excuse for coming' home at this hour i" SuBband : * .Let me in, M'ria. Jost come from the meeting of the labour union. Been considering what we'd do about the recent strike." Wife: * Well, you just sit down on the doorstep and consider what you'll do about the recent look-out.* And ehe slammed down the window.
WHERE TOYS ARE MADE. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
! "WHERE TOYS ARE MADE. The largest toy factory in the world is in .New York, where playthings in tin are manufactured literally by the mil'ion. It stands fivo storeys high, and turns out 1,607 j distinot varieties of tin toys. No. 1 in the oatalogne is a tin horse; 1,607 a tin mon agery. The output of circular tin whistles is J2 million per annum. To make a tin horse twelve indies long, diaoa have to bo east coating £600. Juineau, of Paris, mn lc ,s 2,000 dolls a day, nearly all of oonsidoiable size ; every yoc»r /Tranco oxports toya lo the value of throe millions sterling, chiefly dolls; of which toys in various sizes 26 ndll'ons aro estimated to bo manufactured and Bold in Europe annually. Toys aro imported to England ohiefly from Gormany and Hol- land, the former oonntry sending us an annual supply of tho averago value of £320,000 ; and that from Holland being worth £125,000 ; from Franco, £90,000 ; and that from Belgium over £70,000. Nuremberg, in Bavaria, ia the groat centro o...
FROM BAD TO WORSE. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
FROM BAD TO WORSE. A bashful man received an invitation to dinner, and on arriving at the house he was overwhelmed by the apologies of his hostess for the poverty of a well-spread table. Feeling it incumbent upon him to make some remark, ho said, 4 Oh, it is very good, what there is of it !' Seeing that this was hardly complimentary, he amended it thus, 41 mean there is plenty of it, suoh as it is !'
TEMPTING MILLIONAIRES' APPETITES. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
TEMPTING MILLIONAIRES' AP PE TITES. ? Londonera are fond of boasting that tho best of everything is to bo had in their oity. Till a couple of months ago that boast oannot be said to hove boon justified, for London looked the presenoe of tho finest cook in tho world. M. Joseph, who j >inod tho staff of tho Savoy Hotol about two months ago, is to all other oooks what W. G. Grace ia to oriokoters and John Roborts among billiard playors only moroso. When M. Jonoph was engaged in Paris about, six years aj&lt;o Mr Vanderbilt used to make a journoy to Paris every time he wanted a good dinner. Bat ovon a dinner which is moro Jiko a droairt than a moro oornmonplaoo meal is apt to IOHO some of its flavour when ono na* to travel two thousand miles to onjov it. Finally Mr Vanderbilt suocoedod in allur- ing Joseph to join his housohold in Now York. Nobody, by tho way, ovor 'ongago«' M. Joseph, as ho ia as coy as a prima donna, and only doigns to honour with his prosonc*' suuh families...
SAME ANSWER. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
SAME ANS WE tl. A witty individual ono morning wagered that ho would ask tho samo question of fifty difforent persous and rooeivo tho Rame answer from each. Tho wit wont to first ono and thou to another, until ho hod roached tho number of fifty. And thib is how ho won the bot. Ho whispered, half audibly to eaoh : - 11 say, have you hoard that Smith has failed ?' ' What Smith P* quoiiod tho whole fifty, ono af tor another, and it was decided that tho bot had boon fairly won.
SCIENCE. SMOKELESS COAL. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
? ' - SMOKELESS OÓA¿. / . A. German engineer ha^ invented a method of making smokeless coal. It consists in feeding the fiamos of his furnaces with powdered coal du*t instead of with solid lumps. Ji'or this purpose a receiver charged with powdered coal is erected before the fur- nace, and the dust, after passing through a bent tube, enters tho furnace through a small fievo, tho rotation of whioh, oaused by tho natural current of air entering from bolow, serves Lo scatter the powder over the furnace. It is claimed for tho invention tbat not only does it save a largo percentage of coal, but that it onables tho inferior qualities to be uaod with equally satinfaotory results. This invention, it is olaimed, will cause something like a revolution in our great industries. I
HE MUST HAVE BEEN A CENTIPEDE [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
i HE MUST HAVE BEEN A CENTIPEDE A lady was showing a visitor the family portraits in the picture gallery. * That officer there in uniform,' she said, ' was my great- grandfather- Ho was as brave aH a lion, but ono of the most unfor- J túnate of .mon. Ho nover fought a battle in which ho did not have an arm or a leg oar ried away.' Then she added proudly: * He took part in twenty-four engagements.'
SELF-MADE LADIES OF TITLE. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
SELF-MADE LADIES OF TITLE. ; ' Tho tradesman who does a high class business has- no more dangerous enemy than the artificial 'My Lady' or 'Countess.' This statement was made by a gentleman himself at the head of an establishment of the kind referrod to. ' It is,' bo continued, ' from suoh unfor- tunate shopkeepers that daring adventuresses ot all sorts obtain the bulk of their supplies, the people who also chiefly suffer baing hotel proprietors and lodging houso keepers, house owners, and landlords of flats. London, Paris, Vienna, and New York are probably the chief centres of activity for these clever female swindlers, and every sen.°on thousands of pounds are lost in these cities. 4 Often r' only at the start of*operations that sue- i pie have any difficulty. Take a oase point. On the proceeds of a similar deal on the Continent, a foreign lady of most refined manners and striking appear- ance came to town, posing as a oountess. Her initial anxiety was to get a handsome mansion to ...
THE PRINCE AND TAILORS. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
THE PRINCE AND TAILORS. I. The Philosophy of Clothes has yet to ba authoritatively laid down, and so, too, has the etiquette. For instance, when President Faure visited tho Queen at Cimiez the other day he wore a frock coat and a glossy high' hat, which would have been a credit to Bond Street or tho Boulevard dos Italiens. Yet when tho Prince of Wales returned the call on behalf of the Queen his Royal highi ness wore a picturesque but highly informal groy felt hat vvith a broad brim. The Prince is tho pink of oourtesy and the glass of fashion, eo you may be sure it was oorreot, yet one would have thought that the Presi- dential ohimney-pot would have implied an equally formal Lincoln and Bennett on the part of the Prince. II. The Prince oí Wales is absolute arbiter of fashion in tho best society, although he is by nr> means tho slave of dress which the other Prince of Wales, afterwards George the Fourth, was. The 'First Gentleman in Europe* designed his own pantaloons, and, it is...
HUMOUR. THE POOR MAN'S BEQUEST. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
THE POOR MAN'S BEQUEST. An old man of Galashiels, Borne years ago, on his deathbed, called bis numerous sons and daughtors together, and addressed them thus : 4 My children, I am about to be summoned away. I am a poor man, and have little to leave ; but ail 1 have I willingly give you.' Saying whioh, ho beckoned thom to his bedside, kissed them, and gave them all the measles !
DON'T TALK SO MUCH. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
DOfl'T TALK SO MUCH. A prominent physician alleges that the oauso of half tho nervous prostrations among women is too much talking. Energy and nerve foroo aro consumed in continuous ohattor, quito as much as in hard labour of any bthor kind. Tho tooguo and tho facial muscles roquire rost in ordor to repair tho wanto oausod by oxoroiso. Many woroon imagino thoy aro rosting when thoy put down thoir houHO work and drop into a neighbour's house for a littlo gossip ; but thin, through a olíanlo, is quite as woaring, upon tho norvos as the othor form of oxoroiso. ,"
POETRY. 'I THANK THE FATES.' [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
POETRY. ] . I THANK THE FATES.' I thank the Fates who made yon fair, A rich delight for me, Who Jit the stars within your eyes, Their every gleam a dear surprise, I thank the Fates who made you fair. I thank the Fates who made you blind To »ll the ill in mo, Who hid of former days the tale, O'er your pure gaze drew down the veil, I thank the Fates who made you blind. I thank the Fates who made you mine, Who sent you down for me, « To lead me to olear day from night, Blot out the wrong, make sweet the right ; I thank tho Fates who made von mine. -CONSTANCE SUTOUFFE.
BOWS AND ARROWS USED STILL. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
BOWS AND ARROWS USED STILL. "?f Il ia not generally kuow that the defence bf Pekin ia etill partly entrusted to bowa and arrows. A recent imperial deoree solemnly direots that those who ' sucoeod in hitting the target with their arrows on horseback five times be given r such and such rewards, while those who manage to hie tho mark four times on foot and onoo on horse- back, and four times on foot only, shall bo proportionately recompensed.
TULIP FESTIVAL. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
TULIP FESTIVAL. Tulips are cultivated in Constantinople, and there is a tulip festival there once a year in spring. JWvery palace, room, gallery and garden is dooorated with tulips of every hind. At night they are all lighted by colored'lamps and Bengal fires, and the Sul- tan sits in their midst, while women sing around him and his odalisques dance before him.
TRAVELLER. USEFUL FOR KLONDIKE. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
: r- .mâVffi&lB, : USEFUL FOR KLONDIKE. Professor Tyndall used to say that bia Alpine guides ate butter and honey while climbing, finding that they supplied the greatest amount of heat and nourishment. He himself nibbled a cake of obocolate every two hours while on the mountains. Nowa- days one may easily, too, carry soup «quares or tea tablets to be readily made into a refreshing drink with the addition of hot water.
GOOD BUSINESS. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
GOOD BUSINESS. \ MISSISSIPPI morclmot, during a day's busi- ness in which hu was crowded with cistoni urs. a >ld a saddle to the valua of forty dollars and forgot to put it down. Next day, recol- lée ing the fact of tho sale, but unable to re lupmbrtr the name of the purchaser, hodireo ted his clerk Jim to re id over the alphabeti- cal list in the ledger aloud in tho h ipe of re- freshing his memory, but bia labor was lost. Worn out hy the effort, and a« tho readiest foe'hod of getting over the difficulty, he said : "Jim. put down a saddle to every one of the customers." This was achordinglj' done. When the planters had got their cotton in and setting time came round, the bills were presented, and if oocasionly one tuan more prudent than thereat of his neighbours wont through the drudgery of looking over a long list of sundries got hy different members of the family, aud, discovering a saddle which they h¿d not, or one more than thpy had got ohjpoted toit, the item would he struc...
WANTED TO SEE THE OVEN. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
WANTED TO SEE THE OVEN. A country minister, on entering the pulpit one Sunday morning, exhorted his con gregation, and immediately before delivering his sermon said: "Now I wish to say that only yesterday I overheard some young men aa they slipped out of the train before me say to one another ' You're a liar !' Just think of it, the one member of my church saying to the other ' You're a Har !' Would it not be far better, "c,he continued, "just to give a whistle if you misdoubt any person than to call him albir?" At this point the parson hegan his sermon, «nd takiug for his subject the parable of the loaves and the fishes, said : "Now, dear friends, tho loaves in those days were liku little hills in comparison to what, they are n«»w. Whistle fmm the gallery. Minister: "Who is that calling me a liar ?" A voice; "John Brown, the baker, sir." Minister: '* 'Well, John Brown, what hiivo you got to s &lt;y ?'' John Brown: "I wou'd say that if the loaves worn like little bills, then...
TURN AND TURN ABOUT. [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
TURN AND TURN ABOUT. A HOMK Riile candidate in Ireland e'ngnged in canvassing, visited a Working m in's house, in thepruicipal room of which a pictorial represen tn ti on of the Pope faced an illustration of King William, of pious and immortal memory, in the act of crossing the Boyne. The worthy man stared from one to the other in amazement, and seeing his surprise, the' voter's wife explained : "Shure, my husband's an Orangeman and I'm a Catholic. " " How do you get on together?" asked the astonished prJitieian. "Very well indade," replied the lady, " bnrring tho twelfth of July, when my hus- band goes out with tho Orange procession and comps homo dhruok." .. Well ?" " Well, he always takes the Pope down and jumps on him, ' and then goes straight to bed. The next morning I get up early before he ia awake, take dowu King William and pnwn him, and buy a uew Pope with the money. Then I, give the old man the ticket to get King William out.
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
EX-MINISTIÎKS in Now South Wains should not be too downcast. They might be in a worse plight. Rowland Rees, a former member of the South Australian Cabinet, has been fined ¿G2 for travelling without a railway ticket. For Consumptive Coughs tulce Wood's Gt eat Peppermint Cure, 1/(5 and 2/0. Mu. Wise has already electrified tho House by tho point and pungency of his oratorical style. His address on tho Governor's speech was particularly fino and cilective. Wood's Great Peppermint Curo Coughs for and Colds never fails, 1/6 und 2/0. weil «g lopii Little Appetite and no Energy. These are symptoms that effect a large number of people. Below we give the testimonial of Mrs. A. Morgan, of East Brisbane, Queensland, who does not hesitate to tell you of just the remedy that cured her. " The past season I had a severe at- tack of dengue fever which left ine feeling very weak and languid with little appetite and no energy. But I am pleased to say , . ..( cured me. As a blood purifier and tonic f...
NEW BACKS FOR OLD. SOME SOLID SYDNEY FACTS. (From Evening News, Sydney). [Newspaper Article] — Liverpool Herald — 27 August 1898
NEW BACKS FOR OLD. SOME SOLID SYDNEY FACTS. (From Evening JVetc>s, Sydney). '? We'ré doing it every day. It is nur business. Old backs'mude new ? Yes. Marvellous isn't it ? Not so much so, however, when you know vvho we are. We are Doan's Backache' Kidney Pills. Our work'is making new backs but of old. Old Hacks ache. That is, they seem to ache. It's the kidneys that ache. But the back does the talking. Backache is not all there is of kidney disease. It's only the starter, so to' speak. Urinary troubles follow thick and fast. Excessive urine -very common com- plaint. Sediment in urine-getting worse. High color worse still. Diabetes,-Bright's Disease-Daath. That's th«? end. MORAL. Trade that old tmok for a new one. And do it at once. D"ii't wait for all the coming horrors. Doan's Backicke Kidney fills will inako the old backs new. Ask Sydney people about it, they know. To show that the abovo is not over-stated. her« is n caseriuht here in Sydney, that of Mr. William Elliott. Mr. E...