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A WOMAN'S SUFFERINGS AND GRATITUDE A VOICE FROM AUSTRIA. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
A ChAJN'S SUIWERIGS AND GRA''ITUDE A VOICE FROM AUSTRIA. Rear the village of Zillingdorf, iri Lodei A irjt, lives Maria Hans, ;in intclIigr?it and :tirltstrious woman, whiisli' story of plhvsicol Ito *-riug and final relitf, as f'!attld by lHrself, ni-.*interegt-ttoEnglislewien.-'"I*eitrigda' Tu E.-cd," she ays,"Jin the work tif a11 lre far sx>..itach, until I wats IuImbIlti. o?it'iih dithlel 15,,:' of drink. 1fiL ctuipf',ltl4 t fbril; tcifiAi i. foi sevetlwi wceks. (ttting a little better fr n;i1 fist atid quiiit I stught to do sohle work, hinit Ni:s sddui taiken with ait pitit in irv side, w licih in a little while sc:iif, tit;lflre. idd t:. i m wholle bod? iArtd tht?li4rl d _ .n mv everfy l.,i-'i oftbreath, iintil fltl I . .ll duld. ilt seiw "*'--i'to'i o hiVi'ir for the scond lld,;d, Is I i V*iuughbk. fr theJ:L.t'i; *i»:al *!idtlthibr i1 •( of.pnyltimihlydi *(..&lt;r e.sl llg,. i?gl.n ttt I trould ,d it» livt,loitg.'r..lii.1,? ,: uttnl).I.Ij u, .a thl'ir jii3ii9t2 111...
Taking Practice. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
Taking Practice. Bobby Waters one day heard his father 'remark that Dr. Blank was the best practio. ing physician in Melbourne. A few even ings later Dr. and Mrs. Blank came in ; and, after listening to the conversation for some time, Bobby edged around in front of the doctor, and during a lull in the conversation, asked earnestly : "Dr. Blank, are you a practicing phyasi cian??" "Yes, my ,little =mak;,' replied the doo tor, smiling, "1 why do you ask ," " Oh, nuthin'. Say, :how long have yeou been one.t' '::" si " y.. "lAbouitisixteen yeas.i" " Hull! ,Been practi oi'.' sixt/en years ! Why ;thee'a' my brotheti Bill, he's only studied foiroyears jn hie's a reg'lar doctor already.
Facetiæ. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
Facet1i. __ The I Attorney-General of New S?4uth'1 Wales is Wise. TI e "Army" 'barracks :building at 'Gee-, long was first a brewery, then a theatre, but now it has come to salvation. The S.S. 'oves a bad record, even wilh its buildings. An advertisement from a local daily,.:. " Amateur vocalist, baritone, servicgq. t0o concerts gratis,-address." Here is one. of. those unseasonable atrocities who will sing 4 you stone deaf free of charge, and yet would not chop your wood or black your boots un-. der twelve and six a week and his keep. Intercolonial eight-Intercolonial hate.;.. " What is in a name ? !'- - A pile ; two Ali Sins have lately been hauled up for theft in one day. The other day the postmistress of: one of our local offices was interviewed by a; yokel,. i :who demanded his letters, etc. She handed. him one, at' the same time remarking that it was a dead-letter from the D.L.O. The yokel took the missive, and then, slowly 'shaking his head, remarked : "'I doant think there's ...
He Had Studied the Manual. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
He Had Studied the Manual. *A young man who had been prominent in amateur clubs and pauliaments, and whose strongest point, his friends thought, was the very natural and easy way in which he grasped Parliamentary usage, recently began studying for the ministry, and progressed so far that he was invited to tike charge on a certain Sunday of the services in a subur ban church' where the minister had' gone for his vacation. "He'll be a shining light, without a doubt," said his fi nds. .But som.ehow, when the young man came to get ap in church to open the, service, he felt himself all at sea, and didn't know what in the world.to do. So he provided for all icontingencies by inviting one of the elders to sit up in the pulpit with him, where he would be on hand' if any 'knotty questioa 'arose. . 'After the young student had' pronounced" the` invocation, and the choir had got up.of its own motion and sung an anthem, and a chapter of the; 'Bible had beeii read, the young man turned a little ...
Child's Etiquette. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
Ohild's Etiquette. A South Yarra lady was teaching her baby the prayer, " Now I layme." She had learned it as far as " If I should die," when there: was company expected to tea, and the little one was given her first lesson in table eti quette. " Now, don't forget to say, 'If you please' when you wan't anything," commanded the mother. '" Me won't fordet," answered the baby. But she forgot all about it, and asked for the cake without any prefix. ' If '--prompted the mother. " If I-should-die, Now div me turnm cake," responded the wee one promptly.
My Mother-in-law and I. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
iMy Mother-in-law and I. I am Moses Muzzeythorpe. ' My wife is Mrs. Muzzeythorpe. The story is about her, and myself, too, in a lesser degree. Perhaps it may be a lesson to some husbands. If any man contemplating matrimony should read this, it may be a lesson to him. 'I am past help myself, and I am free to own it. Some men may help themselves. I can't. I tried, though, and that is what I am going to tell you about. We were as happy as bees in a sunflower until Mrs. Muzzeythorpe's mother came to stay with us. ,he said it would be such a help and comfort to Eliza-that's Mrs. Muzzeythorpe. It wasn't to me, though. She was an old lady, with a cinnamon-colored false front, two large eyes of different color, a complexion like a frozen russet apple, and teeth that would persist in dropping out every time she opened her mouth a little too wide. She didn't like smoking; she thought', I was a brute for staying out later than nine p.m.; and she thought Eliza was crazy for letting me use a lat...
Foresight. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
Foresigiht "Charles, is it true that all brokers are. unhealthy?" asked a sharebroker's wife.of her husband.i. " "Well, not all of them; but the lif:of a .broker, is: full of care and trouble, and the. pace- - ` ft ' " Arid'do' thej ll die suddenly at about the age of forty ' she continued. - '..The paper etated sothe otiierday," re plied the broker, who, thinking that his wife. •might ?swooni at -the idea'of `his' being sud denly snatched from~her, assured herthat he was perfectly healthy, and likely to,:live many years." _ Well, I suppose it is a peculiarity of the business ; but,' Charley, you are thirty-seven, and doni't.you think you had better increase your :insurance. -policy to . ten thousand, dear;?" .
Reliable. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
Reliable. " Say, Jhoanes, what sort of a chap is that Smitthe ? I let him half a sov. last week,' and he 'said he'd pay me in eight or ten days. Is he to be depended upon ?". i "Oh, yes, he's to be depended upon, all right enough. When ever Smitthe says he'll. do anything, you can just bet your last:buit. ton he's lying like thunder. -To be depended upon? Well, I should think so 1"
A Clever Swindle. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 11 June 1887
A Clever Swindle. 'The following particulars of'the 'ldnios of a Priaian swindler are fur!shed by Lire :P.is correspondent, of the S. dA. Chronicle : "Comte de la Grandiere helongod to the Marines, frotm which he 'd serte I and was punished ; 'neit he' turnned swindler, and made money for a time. He posed as- a member of fashionable. society, and in that character went to view all the first-class fur nished apartments in Paris which were to be let, managing while looking at the rooms to secure some valuable article as a souvenir. He got round a baron, and agreed to t dke over his rooms for 25,000 francs a year. After verbally accepting conditions he and 'the ,baron also sworeaneternal friendship, and the former lent the count 150 francs out of his pocket-book stuffed with bank notes. The baron invited him to stay the night in his apartments. In the morning, just as the baron was getting up, the comte came to take leave. He wanted to give his notary intruc tions 'to prepare the lease...
From Sydney to New York: OVER THE RIO GRANDE AND BURLINGTON ROUTES. (Continued.) CHICAGO. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
From Sydney to New York : OVER THE RIO GRANDE AND BURLINGTON ROUTES. By E. W. Mooi,:of the Newr York J1irror. j(Continued.) CHICAGO, The city of Chicago has many points of interest to tourists, and has a wonderful his- i tory,'but our space will not admit of such a I lengthened accotlnt of the metropolis of the z West as it deserves. Situated on the shores t of Lake Michigan, a few minutes' walk from ' the Grand Pacific Hotel brings one to the I Lake side, where myriads of small craft are sailing about, presenting a very charming I appearance. Canals run up into the centre ( of the city, and vessels of all sorts and sizes a are discharging grain and lumber. Many of the streets have bridges over the canal to the E north side, and in some instances you can a walk or drive under the river by means of a tunnel. In catching a train, a quarter of an I hour's grace is always given the cabby on I consequence of the blocks which occur on t the various bridges during the passage of a vessels....
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
"ol* .Quick Despatch, and for V.Ocderate Price, at the Office of W WverttsWng Departmet every effort f msw e to ouutomers-Speoii .^thiss Newspaper. n the Advertlsing Department every effort smade to eatisfy oustomer--Special Inducements for Large Advertisements, and Iow Quotations for a. @=* - * - L |5 . .I i. . WhMI n n • 1 8 g A I 1m m M M m • 1anm m I 1"tn I Sw 5 11 ,1 nnN m nn nn A ,1 A m g m mn I H M g 1ra m m agg ,M m I I nnn I 8n .. .... mA W . ...... ·MM MM M 5 m a a am ogg a umM. u ng IM nn
Wit and Humor [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
A ghost's garment is a shroud of mystery. - Strange as it may seem, when money is close it is difficult to get very near it.'. Fish is good brain food, but it does seem a pity, in some cases, to waste so much fish. "Johnny, have you a paternal governmenti at your house ?". Johnny-" We have so. I've .seen papa turn all the children over his .:. knee." On the rolling deep. First Passenger "Well, old boy, what's up this afternoon ?"' Second Passenger-"-' All but the soup." Stranger (entering a photograph gallery in haste)-" I say, do you take negatives here ?" Photographer-" Yes ;. do. you want to sit?" Stranger-" No." ' ? : A barrister, noticing that the court had: gone to sleep, stopped short in the middle of his speech. The sudden silence awoke the. judges, and the lawyer gravely resumed-" As I remarked yesterday, my lords--" The puzzled judges stared, as though they half believed they had been asleep since the pre vious day. Conversation overheard one afternoon be tween two servant...
The Heavy Villain. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
The Heavy Villain. We viewed him first in tragic play, A heavy villain dark and ruddy, Stealing beauteous maids away, Doing deeds both black and' bloody. Three cops he slew in conflict dire ,. And poked a baby down the sink, He stuck his grandma on the fire, Put arsenic in his father's drink.' Some fifty folks he then did brain All with a waddy full of lead, Because the rascal stood to gain A fortune if they all were dead. A man of terror he, and gore; Good'for murder, theft, and treason.: - He slew of Chinamen a score Without the slightest show of reason., * Next morn we saw him mild and fair, As we passed by his cottage door; His dear wife had him byithe hair, Banging his head upon the floor .
Mrs. Norton's Mind-Cure. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
Mrs. Norton's Mind-Cure. :" Onde of the most striking instances of 'mind-cure' I ever saw," said a Sydney lawyer one day, "was exhibited in an old lady.client of mine; but it was a case of self-cure ..-Her name was Norton. - She had been a second wife. She was in bed, seriously ill, and sent for me to draw upher.. will. " I hastened to the house with paper and , pen. She lived on a farm- out toward,, Parramatta. I found a table and chair ready for me at the woman's bedside, and in a few moments I told her I was ready to prepare the will, if she would tell me what she wished its provisions to be. I wrote thei:" introductory phrase rapidly, and, leariing,, o er towards her,' said, 'Now go on, Mrs. Norton.' " Her -voice was quite. faint, and she seem to speak with an effort. Shea said : ' First of all, Iwant to give the farm to my . sons, Harry and James. Just :put that down.' "' But,' said ,I 'you: can't do that, Mrs. Norton. The farm isn't yours to give away.'i ? * "'The farm isn't m...
QUEENSCLIFF BAND. To the Editor. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
" .QUE "NSCTII -B-- I -i?to Sir, ii reli ng the A8t ittiel I it el- ii, riargraj lh cOiicernni sl 1 i:rijtti)-:i. :thi;t!. bili'iin kiningtl?e' Qiieiisrli!f B3:111h. -t woull: be. a ii -2-rcto t. t.I i,, habi ,tints of t'ie- Clif. to nallv it to full liriouiIh I se: lt:hait M".. C. .C Simpson hls sorine foity slubsei-ibeis r,.ion'g to pay 1 s ;pe:- imonith, inaking it. 12s. )1er fyear. Now , Sir, if they iaid maide it: 21s.,per ye iear-, I :.n1 ,ssure~Syou oiuld li le had as miny subscriters, thereefoi I nclaose my £1 is foi the yrl conribution towrds the X Youis, et e. JOHN ESHIEEI+HRU '. Melbouni tb June 18S. (Cheque receivedti?. iti, th?anks, ,an, it hns beenii .lanede: to 'the hion.?i ecretati oi the Q.B.B.-Ed. Sentinel.).
About the Gaffer. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
About the Gaffer.. The hardest all-round swearer south of the Line is the railway gaffer. We know that an idea exists crediting the bullock driver with the Auistralian championship for ground and lofty profanity. It is erroneous; the boss over a gang of navvies can be called upon to swear the most voluble bullocky off his legs in thirty minutes ten seconds.. We knew a wild-eyed youth of some forty-seven summers who handled a gang in the early days when the Geelong to Ballarat line was in:course of construction. He was an artist at profanity, a perfect daisy; he rejoiced in contorting oaths into all sorts of grotesque meanings, and was as proud of his fame as a professional swearer, or as a game rooster who has just clawed the head off the rival bird next door, One morning McGinnis had his push delving in a cutting, and was treat ing them to a specimen of his floweriest style of oratory: "Now, shift those blanked shovels I Do you want the sun to burn the --- tail-board out: of the sa...
THE CADET CORPS. To the Editor. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 18 June 1887
'THE CADET. CORPS. S ' To the Editorl.: i ::. :.Sir,-Some time ,ago' you hal a not ice inviting ladi to foinma Cadet Corps. :The lads .:diuste'red: 'in' god f6ore, and' tle corps was forned. "'Now, I wouild like to know when; they .ha1ie to attend,' 'drill,: or what are 'tlhe' dirill uiglhts.' At present the lads state thevy have to at tend eyvry night, and upon behin a qiest ibned the fact is '-elicited that tihe sel doi - are drilled. The Cadet :Corps 'appears to be a good-cexcuse for thce lads ;to roarn round after hours free of'paren tal control arid the sooner a.little mili tairy regularity in their drill duties is initiated by the officers in commiand, the better it will be for the lads and also for AN ANXIOUS MOTHER. ' ' * ' * -. - ' ' ' ' - ' * . '', '