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AT A BABY SHOW. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
AT A BABY SHOW. A young reporter attended a baby shlowl, and inspected a pair of twins. "Very pretty, indeed," he said with sweet earnestness; "~ hich of them is the eldest, ma'ai: ?" "Neither," said the mother somewhat angrily. "I observeo that this one does notlooklwell. I trust, my good lady, he has enough to cat." "Ee is a girl, sir," repliedthomothcr, with dignity. "Is the food of the right kind." "Yes, it is." "You know that nothing builds up tho system more rapidly than roast beef; the child ought to have a liberal supply of fresh bteef at once." "hut--" "No teeth,Iobserve," pursed the reporter, "that's very bad, indeed. I suppose the un happy child has been brought here as a ca riosity ?" "What do you mean, sir?" "And it has no hair uorth mentioning. Poor thing !" HE turned to The mother anda remarked, patrc-nisingly: "Let us be thankful, my, good woman, for th~ rrogress of scienve and arts. The poor child can be provided with teeth by the den tist, and you can easily get re...
"TWO OF A TRADE," ETC. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
"TWO OF A TBADE," ETO. " This," said the man, who was travel ling in a railway carriage, as he opened his valise and took out a bottle, "is a mixture called Dr. Jenkinson's Indispensable. I never travel without it. It is the best and most agreeable tonio now on the market, by aol odds." " I am not so sure about that," replied the man who was occupying the seat with him. ' I have here"--and he opened his own valise and took out a bottle-" a sonic calied Dr. Rybold's Extract, which I have used for several years and consider "he best preparation ever made. No man ought ever to-" " I have no doubt it is a fairly good medi cine in its way," broke in the other, but if you had ever tasted Dr. Jenkinson's Indis pensable, you would throw that .stuff of yours away." " I know all about Dr. Jenkinson's nos trum, and I know exactly what it's made of." "You do, eh ?" "Yea, sir; and I know Dr. Rybold's Ex tract is made from precisely the same for nola, only from pure materials instead of he vile a...
MR. DOLLEY'S TWO STRINGS. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
MR. DOLTEY'MS TWO STBINGB. Shortly before ten o'clock as.m.,: young hfr. Dolley acls in the drawing-room, wait ng for Miss Amy fMo:ntmorris to come down i order to join him in a morning ride; but when Amy entered Ihe room at five minutes past ten Mr. Dolley was not there. Amy's little brother, Tommy, was there, however, and to himnt she looked for an ex planation of the young man's disappear eane. " Tommy, where's Mr. Dolley " "Dnuno." "Wasn't he here awhile ago?" "Yes." "Then what made him leave so soon?" "Dunno." "Didn't he say anything when he left about being back in a few minutes ?" "No, he didn't say a word," answered the sphynz-like youth. "What did he do?" "Ha just put on his hat and went out." " Did he seem cross or anything about my being so long in coming down?" " No; but I think he forgot his two strings." " eccy, child! What do yon mean?" "Well, he hadn't g?ot 'em with him." "Hadn't got whie. ?" "Why, his two strings! Didn't I tell yo n?" "Now, look here Tommy I I want ...
IT HAD BEEN THE ROUNDS [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
IT HAD BEEN THE ROUNDS Clara--Is that a new ring you have on, Ethel ? It strihkeas me I have seen it before, 1 think Ethe!--Tes, ilara, young Mr. Paperwate gave it to mes last night. I have accepted him. Ciara-Oh, indeed. I'm o glad. Accepit mny best wishes. I thought that ring looked familiar. Mlatthrac's'a attendant in his last illness intentc I ', Gi-e the patient some medicine, bu;, a :e: omesnsts atter, it was discovered tht ohe 'seen given some ink in mistakeo. His friend eclaimced: " Go?d h'eaens, Moatthews, I have given yon ink l" " Never-nind,-r'll-swallow- a-piece of-blotting-paper." Th-s wa. poor Matthews's last johe. A shlemlacr hung onut a s6ign as foliows : " Iuon't go !evsere to be cheated. Step, in here." And hts wondered what made tli:o pep!e l ;liJh. A bi;: proboscis :s a sign cf in?cliger?,c. In othtr words, tkhe bigger it is tho mrse men nore.
WHICH SHALL IT BE? [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
WIHICH SHALL IT BE? Which shall it be? Which shall it be? I looked at John, John looked at me, -And when I found that I must speak, My voice seemed strangely low and weak: '"Tell me again what Robert said :" And then I listening bent my head This is his letter. "I will give A house and land while you shall live, I', in return, from out your seven, Cne child to me for aye is given." Ilooked at John's old garments worn; I thought of all that he had borne Of poverty, and work, and car, Which I, though willing, could not shar-e; I thought of seven young mouths to feed, Of seven little children's need, And then of this. "Come, John," said I, "We'l choose among them as they lie Asleep." So, walking hand in hand Dear John and I surveyed our band: First to the cradle lightly stepped, Where Lilian, the baby, slept. Softly the father stooped to lay His rough hand down in loving way, When dream or whisper made her stir, And huskily he said, " Not her !" We stooped beside the trundle bed, And o...
CURIOSITIES OF ETIQUETTE. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
CURIOSITIES. OF ETIQUETTE. Those whose lot is cast in a sphere which entails their attendance at Court must often inwardly rebel against the rigid rules of eti quette that have to be obeyed there. But they may congratulate themselves that they are members of a Court the regulations of which are simplicity itself in comparison with those of some others. Laws of e-iquette have been formulated with the objtect of preventing social friction by awarding to every one his or her own rig:hts and particular place. It would be vcry awkward for royalties if they were liable to be pounced upon by anybody who wished to have the honour of coming into direct per sonal contact with them. Who would not Piy the Queen, for instance, if all who at tended the garden parties at Buckingham Palace had the right of walking up to her and warmly shaking her by the hand, as was done by two impulsive but badly-drilled Americans a sear or two ago ? It must be quite weari some enough to receive as many respectful...
YANKEE YARNS. A WONDERFUL CLIMATE. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
YANKrEE YARNS ??. A WONDERFUL CL~MATE. Her great pride was in being an invalid. Ehe Icst no opportunity of stating that she camne :o the seaside torecuperate. She aid rot hesitate to enter into a conversation with any person she came in contacl with, gi-ing advice to invalids, and seeking the same from t rlose of robust constitution. Her conversa ton .as always prefaced by the introductory enquiry so common to visitors: "Did you cme here for your health ?" She thus addressed a stalwart, ruady-vis aged )oung man at tie dinner table, and the following dialogue ensued: " Yes, madam. I came here prcSably the weakest person you ever saw. I had no use of my limbs-in fact my bones were butlittle tougher than cartilages. Ihad nointelligent c-ntrcl of a single muscle, nor the use of a s ngle faculty." "Goodness gracious! anid yonulived !" said ?.he. "I id, madam. Although I was devoid of sight, toothless. unable to utter a word, and dependent on others for everything, I began to gain immedia...
A MISUNDERSTANDING. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
A XISIUNDERSTANDING. A jashful swain of Holly Springs, Miissis sippi, took a violent " hankering " after a fair seamstress of the town, and, after a great deal of hesitation, finally brought his courage cop to- the stxcking-point. and made an c\rin ing eall at hcr housee. Hie fomund her busily enga ;ed at her work, pressing a garment with a tai:or's goose. She, however, received him very courteously, and continued her work. A btey of the seamstress's female friends finroned in a few minutes after the poor man had subsided into silence, for he found it absolutely impossible to maintain a conver sation with her. The sudden entrance of the visiters, instead of relieving, only added to his embarrassment, and he sat in silence un til it became a matter of serious concern to the crmpany how to put him at his ease, for he was well lnown to all of them as a man of great worth, bashfulness being his cnly weakness. The seamstress finally gotthrerough with her work, and called ouat to the negr...
FASHIONABLE STYLES IN MILLINERY. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
FASHIONABLE STYLES IN MILLINERY. The following are stylish examples of a bonnet and hat, with suitable bodice and neck garmshings to accom pany them. The bonnet is composed of a bow of heliotrope ribbon, fastened in true artistic fashon to a bonnet foundation, covered -ith tulle of the same colour, and edged with p'nk almond bloss ams around the pointed outline. The short ties are fastened with a stud at the side. The bo-lice ornament is of white lace insertion, forming, with alternate stripes of pleated white muslin, over heliotrope ribbon; Zouave jacket shapes sur rounding the armholes. The veil is of heliotrope net. Of a pretty light coloured brown plaited straw. the hat is lined with black tulle with a thick covered wire to agree passing over the edge of this. A floral wealtth of pelar goniums, tinted pale pink and black, a pink andl black rose with folinge standing upright in the fr .nt, contri butes the trimming. At the neck is h bow of plisse white tulle, fastened with an ant...
YOUNG LADY'S PRINCESS ROBE. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
:YOUfNG vLADY'S PRINCESS - ROBE. The robe is tight-fitting shape, haviing double btiut darts,' sholder 'nd under-arm seams and side and centre back seams, the second side seams being shortened in the skirt, whilst the three centre ones have extensions below the waist, which are formed into under pleats at the top, buthbelow fall into unconfined fulness. The robe is fastened with invisible hooks and eyes in the centre-front, and at the top it is trimmed with an oval yoke, bordered at the sides with triple bre telles. At the bottom the skirt is bordered with two flounces. A close collar protects the neck, and the sleeves are in gigot style. Tomake the robe of material 44 inches' wide for a young lady of 12 years it will require 5¼ yards, with a quarter of a yard 20 inches wide for yoke trimming; for 16 years 6. yards, with three quarters of a yard of trimming. The pattern is No. 1690, is cut in Four sizes, from 12 to 18 years of age, price (any size) is. 3d. ...., .... .
AMUSEMENT FOR LITERARY HOMES. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
AMUSEMENT FOR LITERARY HOMES. An E!nglish newspaper contained the innouncement that " Mr. - is building a huse at W--that will be just the ?place for a mnan of literary tastes; Around the fiielhlce, instead of tiles, he will lhave set rhe electrotype plates of his first book. It ,vas printed when he was sixteen.' Whiat an ideal .What a wealth of pos sibilities it calls iip! Literary people ,vlio have hitherto been too poor to follow thl:e vagaries ot fashion in decoration can now a:tford to be abreast of the times. Even the millionaire will have to stand back when this new fashion begins to prevail, unless some of the family can produce a literary masterpiece and have it cast upon plates '"more tasting than brass." It will be only a matter of time when we shiall read paragraphs like this " Last night at a dinner given by Mr. X., die celebrated writer of short stories, the name of each guest, instead of being on an ordinary square card, was painted on the back of an editor's 'IDeclin...
THE FIRST CHEW OF TOBACCO. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
THE FIRST CHEWV OF TOBACCO. The boy said it was a peculiar kind a" tobacco, and was known as molasses to bacco, because it was so sweet. The other boys didnot ask how he came to know its name or where he got it-boys never ask anything that would be well for them to know-but they accepted his theory and his furtl.er statement that it was of a mildness singularly adapted to learners without misgivings. The boy was himself chewing vigorously on a large quid, and launclhing the juice frorn his lips right and left like a grown per son, and my boy took as large a bite as his benefhictor bade him. He foundit as sweet as he had been told it was, and he a knowledged the aptness of its name as molasses tobacco. It seemed to him a golden opportunity to acquire a noble habit on easy terms. He let the quid rest in his cheek, as he had seen men do, when he was not crushing it between his tveth, and for some moments be poled his plank up and down the canal boat wih :a sense of triumph that nothing...
A "FRIENDLY LEAD." [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
A " FRIENDLY LEAD.' - Now soMg PEOPLE BMSE TiCg cDa. Perhaps the nost '-tiii~ sethe? ot raising the wind is that kLn,,wn;as the "friendly lead." The writer obtained she following interesting i,,rnalioun re specting this strange ceston, frnm the proprietor ol a public-house situated in a poor part of London. The father of a family falls ill, or the wife dies, or a child has to be buried, or a bread winner is clapped into gaol for a month or to: then is the time [f-r the gsoot-natured friends of the family to start a " friend-iv lead "with a view to assisting the distressed ones. Suppose the case of the mother of a family of children having died. A boaom friend of the hlusband inmmediately makes arrangements for a "lead," and this is how he sets aboutit: He goes to the landlord of the public honse most patronised by thie bereaved family, and asks his permission to hold the lead in the taproomn on some early Snaturdayevening. This mine host readily gives his consent to; for does he not...
A Drink for Life or Death. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
A Drink for Life or Death. * I came to India in 1S-- as a private in the --th Beg~iment, and my company formed 534- of the garrison at Arcot We found Aroot horribly dull, and it was with great satisfac:ion that we hard an order had been given for our company to march to Vedore to strengthen the the garri son there, which had been very much reduced by cholera. It eas then about the middle of MIarch, and consequently later than is usual for moving troops, as the days begin to get very hot on the plains in the Carnatic about that time of the year. But ours w-as special duty, and as we should only march in the very early morning, we did not fear the inconve nience of the midday heat, but looked upon the whole thing as rather a lark, and a wel come change from the monotony cf garrison duty. As to the cholera, not one of us gave it a thought. Mot likely it would toucLh eCe of us! It was on the second day after leaving Arcot that Private Thomas Atkins, who was my right file, suddenly had t...
Socialism Analysed. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 25 January 1895
Socialism Analysed. BY W . A WATT. Of all the questions which this singu larly eventful century has raised to popular prominence, probably none is less understood, relative to its intrinsic im portance and the amount of discussion it excites, than Socialism. Ignorance of its fundamental principles, and the mechan ism for their concrete establishmnent, is common to both its supporters and enemies. To its advocates it is generally an ideal unaccompanied by positive detail, to its opponents a " red spectre "; and to all-whether alluring or repugnant- it is alike remote and indefinite. Exag gerated fears and unwarranted hopes are the natural concomitants of this incoher ency. Obviously then, immediate attempts should be made to gain precise knowledge of the subject. Recognising this to be tie desideratum, I intend in this essay to al together discard verbal ornamentation,and apply myself to a thoroughly practical dis cussion, of what is an intensely practical matter. Doubtless the subje...
CARE OF FARM HORSES. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 1 February 1895
CARE OF FARM HORSES. .,lJt.isapparent evenoto an indifferent observer that the general run of farm horses do not have that smooth and well cared-for look that the majority of the horses of city transportation and car companies possess; though the latter on.an average, do vastly more work in! a day than the horses upon the farm. The secret of the matter is in,the care and feed. : Farm horses almost invariably eat too much hay, which distends the stomach when taken in large quantities, prevents that organ froin doing its full duity, and makes the horse dull and weak. Many farmers have no regular ration for their horses, but throw down a fork ful of hay almost every time they enter the barn. As a result, many of these horses are eating hay from morning till night, to themanifest disadvantage of the haymow and the manifest harm, also, of the horses, whose bodies become dis tended, skins dry and coats rough, while the digestive organs are out of gear, so tlat the animntal's whole system ...
The Farm. SHEET AS WEED KILLERS. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 1 February 1895
SSHEE l .'il?S =',L\\ ,EEI?: :KIL L'E?RS) l As eaters of ,r isl :an\,.n?IousInsi;,n, says the" A iipCAN 'r ~ ... s"" ' sheep will dto 'good service, but they must not be kept at it steadily, or they will grow thin, and their fleeces will suf fer in consequence. The flock must be compelled to browse only a few days at a time. After the gratification of this diet ceases, there is no longer profit in confining sheep to such food. No other live stock demand more constant change. If the sheep be divided into sevenal flocks, one may follow another into a field where brush or weeds are becoming troublesome, and each returned again after a week's relief on grass. Most plants can be killed by removing, the leaves during the summer. The bushes should be cut down, that the flock may destroy them by eating every new sprout. Briers are more easily subdued early in the season. Large fields should b~e browsed- in small-plats by means of movable fences. When grass has taken the place of brush or we...
Read This Twice. HOW THE PAPER THRIVES. [Newspaper Article] — North Melbourne Gazette — 1 February 1895
Rtead This Twice.. HOW THE PAPER THRIVES. ............ ........ Woa Fre ma n ~i~~~lte d,"-L~write a' conterop~ orary with whoi we canheartily sympath ise, " with invitations to concerts lectures socials, bazaars, tea meetings and the lilke, the favor.to a preli minary notice androp ort being in each instaune respectfully solicited; yes the parties who send these missives never thi :k of favoring the local ofide with any a lv:rtising or printing con nested with sich events. We are always glad to report local matters, but in these hard times cannot affobrd to run ia paper for the express pnrposeof glorifying per sons w ho do noot contribute a cent to the suppor t of the local newspaper. Hence the non-appearance of many items possibly looked, forward to with intense anxiety by Stingy people. [ We wonder if there aret any persons in our district whose conscie ness will be- smittenu by this paragraph ! -Eo.]