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A 'Weekly" Story. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
A 'Weekly" Story. A maiden with a lot of Mon. Was much beloved by everyone. She had a lisp, quite fetching, Tue., And crowds of "chappies" came to woo, But only one she cared to Wed., And when he asked her to, she said: "Oh, yetth, I will right gladly, Thur." Nor did she dally or demur. "Can'st cook?" her tover asked. "Oh, my!" She answered, "I can bake and Fri." Then down her lover promptly Sat. And signed her up to run his flat. P.S.—When fifty weeks and two were done, That happy couple had a Sun.
HONEYMOON TRAMPS. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
HONEYMOON TRAMPS. The average bride when she changes her orange blossoms and her resplendent -wedding dress lor the more prosaic travelling costume, does not usually have to prepare for such a journey as that undertaken by Mr. and Mrs. Grantham, 01 Alberta. After walking 7000 miles and being held up a dozen times, Norman Grant ham, of Calgai-y, -who, with Ills bride, formerly Miss Mabel Ryan, of Minne apolis, started last spring 011 a honey moon tramp around the world, is back in Calgary for a time. Mrs. Grantham's health broke down when the trampers reached Brindisi, on the Mediterranean, forcing the temporary abandonment of the trip. Mr. Grantham will resume the jour ney at once, as soon as his wife's health is restored. Mr. Grantham returns with a whole some respect for the ability of Eng lish pedestrians. He ti-i-ja to break the record of ten hours nnd two min utes from London to Dover—sixty eight miles; but the best he could do was eleven hours and twenty-one min utes.
PERMIT TO REMARRY. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
PERMIT TO REMARRY. Because he has lived "a uniformly good life" for at least Ave years, Mr. Charles R. Pelgram, a millionaire silk manufacturer of Paterson, a town six teen miles from New York, is to he allowed to remarry. A divorce decree granted against him in 1893 contained a ban on his remarriage. Mr. Pelgram has success fully applied to have it lifted, under the provisions of tha new Domestic Relations law, which insists that a divorced husband must live a good life for five years before remarrying. Three well-known business men swore that Mr. Pelgram had fulfilled the conditions of the law, and the mil lionaire himself said that he had been following simple life rules for twenty years. He was married it nineteen.
CHAPTER XI. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
CHAPTER XI. . While Slieila was happy as girlcouli be, without, as she expressed it, a care in the world, very different was the case of Margaret Bellairs. It «was true that her husband never reproach ed her, that lie never, by word or deed alluded to that dark tragedy of the past, but the old tenderness, the ar dent and real love, which had been her portion and which had made her so very happy, seemed—as far as she could tell—to cease to exist. Bellairs was kind to her, paying lier every possible attention, "but he never took her hand as of yore and pressed it in one of his, nor did he look into her eyes with the loving-kindness of for mer days. These things the unhappy woman believed ivere reserved for Sheila and Sheila alone. Bellairs could not pet the pretty girl enough, but he never turned to his wife with the old dearly longed-for look in his eyes. Moreover, there was no doubt hut that Peter Bellairs, K.C., no longer absolutely trusted Margaret. It was he who paid the bills as...
WOMAN'S WORLD. NEVER MIND. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
WOMAN'S WORLD. NEVER MIND. Sometimes, when nothing goes just right, And worry reigns supreme, When heartache fills the -eyes with mist, And all things useless seem, There's just one thing can drive away The tears that scald and blind— Someone to slip a strong arm round And whisper, "Never mind." No one has ever told just why Those words such comfort bring; Nor why that whisper malces cur cares Depart on hurried wing. Yet troubles say a quick "Good-day!" We leave them far behind When someone slips aii arm around, And whispers "Never mind." But love must prompt ■ that soft caress— The love must aye be true; Or at that tender, clinging touch No heartsease comes to you. But il the man be moved by love, Sweet comfort you will find When someone slips an arm around. And whispers ."Never mind."
Foresightedi [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Foreslghtedi New Maid: Would yez mind giving me a rikemmadation, mum? •Mistress: Why, you've only just come! New Maid: But yez may not want to give me wan when I'm lavin', mum. First Lady: Too Ibad! Mrs. S. al ways has such abominable weather for her afternoon teas. :: , Second Lady: Yes; she never ponra but it rains.'
GREATER THAN GOLD Published by arrangement with Ward, Lock and Co., London & Melbourne. All Rights Reserved. CHAPTER X. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
GREATER THAN GOLD By L. T. MEADE, Author of "The Soul of Margaret Rand," etc. Published by arrangement with Ward, Lock and Co., London & Melbourne. All Rights Reserved. CHAPTER X. Those of us wlio have not been pre-1 sented at Court know all about it, in a few cases, from our friends, but for the most part from newspapers and weekly periodicals. Sheila Dauver's debut differed from that of other girls in two respects. In the first place, the extreme simplicity of her dress—which, notwithstanding the Court train and feathers, was made precisely after the Duchess of Tewkesbury's direction—was remark able, and, in the second, she wore the most magnificent pearls of any debu tante and looked, neverthelss, almost like a child. The whole affair went off with the usual eclat, or perhaps one may say, want of eclat. The Duchess of Tewkesbury, who was a particular friend of Her Majesty's, surveyed Sheila as she entered her presence, ana, without a moment's hesitation, removed the brooc...
Not So Green. As He Looked. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Not So Green. As He Looked. A man with a wife who has her own ways about doing things is luclcy enough to catch her now and then. "My dear," he said the other morn ing as he was dressing, "I think you were right when you told me last night that there were burglars in the house." . "Why?" she asked nervously. " "Because all the money that I had in my pockets when I went to bed is gone." "Well," she said, with an I-told-you so air, "i£ you had been brave and got up and shot the wretch you would have had your money this morn ing." "Possibly, my dear, possibly," he said. "But if I had dolie so I would have been a widower." She laughed softly then and gave half of it back to him.
Spiteful. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Spiteful. "My husband considered a very long time before he proposed to me. He was very careful." "Ah, it's always those careful peo ple who get taken in!" Time was when there were no look ing-glasses. In those days men grew long beards and women wore th«!r hair flowing. Whdn the looking-glass came men shaved themselves to dis cover what they were like; nnd then' it was that women began to worry whether their hats were on straight. There has never been a problem that has caused such waste of time or so much distraction as this question of .the straight hat. Some women like children, some like charities, and some like men.
Half and Half. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Half and Half. An old woman of tremendous size hailed a tramcar, and with consider able difficulty managed to climb up and get a seat Inside. When she was comfortably settled, she looked around at a man seated beside her, and said with great vigor: "If you'd been 'arf a man, you'd 'a' 'elped.me hup!" The'man gave a weary smile and replied, "If you 'ad only been 'arf the woman you are, I might 'ave 'ad a try."
THE REPORTER—AN ASSIGNMENT. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
THE REPORTER—AN ASSIGN MENT. TQe fifth house from the corner In this row— Little black tents against the night sky's indigo. Beside the door I flashed a match to find The number richt—and sudden blank ness took my mind! 1 hesitated, peering from the gloom [Beneath the shade into the yellow lighted room, Curious justly, in my errand's Lame: And then I blamed myself, though I was not to blame. A woman sat beside a table spread For one. but suppertime was hours past; her head Bent low for listening, while at her ] thighs A sleepy child was frowning, gouging fists in eyes. 'The woman stirred; I saw her young, worn face. She glanced, impatient^ puzzled, at the empty place. I gulped and knocked. God knows the words I said! I asked her, somehow, if she knew that he was dead! —Paul Scott Mowrer in January "Smart Set."
DELIVERED SPEECH BY TELEPHONE. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
DELIVERED SPEECH EM*- ... JfS TELEPHONE. ~ \ President Wilson has created a pre cedent in speech-making which will probably be imitated by future Presi dents and prominent politicians, who, through lack o£ time for travelling, are unable to fulfil many engagements. The President had promised to address the Rochester Chamber of Commerce at the members' annual banquet which was held recently, but being unable to leave Washington he arranged to deliver his address 1 y telephone: Accordingly speci-1 ar rangements were made by the tele phone companies at Washington r.nd Rochester, New York, and each of the three hundred diners at the banquet v/as provided with a headpiece ra ceiver. About 800 miles away in th? White House the President stepped 10 a specially fitted-up telephone in his private office and delivered hia ad dress, which was clearly heard by all present. The President himself had a headpiece receiver, and was able to listen to the cheers which greeted his address, and to the ...
Improving His Mind. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Improving His Mind. (The gentleman who had dined at his club arrived home in the small hours, and wavering into the library, adjusted the light a.nd, picking up a heavy tome, settlsc'. himself for a studious hour. Presently he felt, rather than saw, his wife standing at the door; lie exaggerated his attitude of close attention to his v-lume. 'Do you know that It's past four o'clock, James?" she addressed him. "You'd better put out the light and come to bed." "Now, m' dear," he said impatient ly, "g' 'way, I'm studying—improving my min'. G' "way." She stood for a moment eyeing him intently. "Please—please close up that suit-case and come, to bed," she implored.
A Little Conversation. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
A Little Conversation. The workman was engaged in ex cavating operations, i.e., lie was dig ging. The wayfarer of the inquisitive turn of mind stopped for a moment to look for a moment to look on. "My man," said the wayfarer at length, "what are you digging for?" The workman looked up. "Money," he replied. "Money!" ejaculated ths amazed wayfarer. "And when do you expect to strike it?" "Saturday," replied the workman, and resumed operations. Irish Barrister (addre sing tlie (bench): Your honor, 1 shall first ab solutely prove to the jury that the prisoner could not have committed the crime with which he 1b charged. If that does not convince the jury, I shall show that he was Insane when he committed it. If that fails I shall show that lie was insane when lie committed it. If that fails I shall prove an alibi." The rector of a country parish hav ing sent blankets and coals and some of the good things usual at Christmas to an old parishioner, a lady expatia ted warmly to him on the rev...
Gentle Hint. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Gentle Hint. A fastidious old gentleman was en joying a cigar with a friend one af ternoon. The guest, having reached the end of his Havana, hurled the stump on to the well-kept lawii. "What made you throw your cigar there?" said the old gentleman, an grily. "See how unsightly It is on the lovely grass." "That surely won't do any harm," Bald the other, "for nobody would no tice a little thing like that." "My dear fellow," solemnly replied .the old grumbler, "it's just little things like these that constitute tidi .ness, and tidiness is half the com fort of life." His friend said no more for a time, and, its a few moments he arose hur riedly, disappeared, and was absent fcr a full twenty minutes. "Where on eaith have you been?" said his host when he returned at last. "Oh, I ve only been across the mea-. (low to spit in the river.''
Nothing to Cry For. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Nothing to Cry For. The session of the provincial law court was. about to begin, but ihe court crier had not yet shown up. At the eleventh hour a messenger-boy dashed in and handed the judge a im ter from the missing functionary. The. judge read it amid breathless silence, and then solemnly announced: "I have here a message from our court crier, saying, 'Wife's mother died last night. Will not be able :o cry to-day.'"
Trumped. [Newspaper Article] — Upper Murray and Mitta Herald — 14 May 1914
Trumped. "I wish I had never learned to play cards!" exclaimed a man who had beeii unfortunate at the game. "You mean you wish you had learn ed, don't you?" was his wife's sarcas tic rejoinder. At a club meeting held in,a public house in a small village a discussion took place as to whether a hard or soft substance would last the longer. The debate continued for some time, until one man spoke up and said:— "Now, men, you are all mistaken, as 1 can easily prove. When me and .my,-wife married she had as good a set of teeth as any woman could have now she hasn't got one, and her tongue is as good as ever." When little DoriB climbed up to her father's knee it was quite ob vious that some deep problem was troubling her mind. Presently she unburdened herself of the moment ous question. "Papa," she asked, "was it a very wise person who said, 'The good die young'?" "Yes," replied the father. "I sup pose he must have been very, very "Well," said the child, after medi tating for some time on ...