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DOWN WITH THE PEDESTRIAN. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
DOWN WITH THE PEDESTRIAN, Owing to the ever.increasing perils of the traffoic in the city streets the pedestrian has been much discussed of late by motorists, who are anxious to keep the pedestrian in his proper place, which seems to be on the foot. path, and nowhere else. It is there fore not surprising that the pedes. trian, after reading the opinions ex. pressed about him by motorists, and enjoying a hearty supper, should have dreamt that he was present-a soll. thry pedestrian, at a meeting of in. uignant motorists, and heard the fol. lowing speech: "If we do not take prompt action, fellow-motorists, not one of us will be alive in Melbourne in another year. During the past 12 months 275 poor motorists have been run over and kiried by pedestrians; 3119 have been seriously injured, 1285 being cripples ,or life. (Groans.) The lives of moe torists will never be safe while pe destrians are allowed to encroach upon the roadways, No motorist to the city streets will ever be sure of seei...
FROM VARIOUS SOURCES [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
FROM VARIOUS SOURCES Don't hurry, Take your time up the hill. Remember, when you get there you must climb down again, More people have lost their lives, or their balance, in tumbling down than in trotting up. Take your time, also, your lunch and your stoutest legs, Keep your breath and your presenc3 of mind, Give.heed, or way, or any thing else you can spare, when a rock is rolling towards you, This is a slow world, and a slow man is al ways ahead of you. You may run, your hardest, but you will never catch up to the slow man, You may pass a thousand, but you will always have a lazy fellow to overtake, You move in a circle, and so does everybody else. You may travel that circle six. ty times, but one half of the popula tion will always be plodding after ,you, while the other half will be toil. ing ahead. You may travel like greased lightning, and the rest of the circle may crawl like worms. The worms will ever be on your orbit, and, if you rush them for a thousand Tears, you will sti...
HOUSEHOLD HINTS. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
HOUSEHOLD HINTS. Before cooking dried fruits,,such as apricots or prunes, soak themn in boil. ing water instead of cold, and when cooking add a teaspoonful of vinegar. This improves the flavor. A troublesome corn can be eased by a poultice composed of a thin slice of lemon norn over It during the day. To remove a rusty screw, first ap. ply a very hot iron to the head for a short time, then immediately use the screwdriver. To test the purity of coffee, pour cold water on it. If the water as. sumes a brownish hue It may be con. cluded that there is chicory with it. To remove red ink-stains from table linen, spread freshly-made mustard over the stain and leave for about half an hour. Then sponge off, and all trace of the ink will have dlesap. peared. Cayenne papper is excellent to rid cupboards of mice, The floor should be gone over carefully, and each hole stopped up with a piece of rag dip pod in water and then in cayenne pep. per. For chapped hands take two or chree slices of lemon,...
FEATS OF THE BLIND. Sightlessness Not Necessarily a Handicap to Success. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
FEATS OF THE BLIND. Slghtleosness Not Necessarily a Handicap to Success, It is really wonderful what the blind can learn to do for themselves, Quite lately, a blind, deaf and dumb girl wrote to the secretary of the in. stitutlon where she had been trained to tell her that she was staying in the country, and was greatly enjoying the games of tennis and croquet, It is well known, of course, that El. len Keller is similarly handicapped, yet she Is one of the most learned women In the world, and her'books are not only read In America, Britain and the Colonies, but are translated into many foreign languages. She has declared that If she met a person In toe Desert of Sahara whom she had met but once before, she would know instantly who it was by their charac. teristlc scent! In New York a blind barber is do. ing extremely well, and It Is said that he has quite as few slips of the razor as the average barber who has all his faculties. In fact, anything which re. quires great delicacy of to...
THINGS MIGHT HAVE BEEN WORSE. The Tale of An Ill-fated Five-Pound Note. I. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
THINGS MIGHT HAVE BEEN WORSE. The Tale of An Ill-fated Five-Pound Note. Bl HELEN LEWIS, I, All her life Mary Brown had shown a peculiar faculty for getting into trouble. Even In childhood she gave evidences of this deplorable charac teristic. When no one else dreamed of whooping; or mumptng, or measling, sure as fate, Mary would hob-nob with the fiends who produced these unpleas ant symptoms, bring them home, and nearly die of their attentions. At the age of ten she entered into confidential relations with a burglar, an Indiscretion which resulted In the loss of all the family plate and Jewels, and some painful hours spent by her. self gagged and locked up in the coal. collar, Later, she had to be denied the usual girlish pastimes, If ever she bathed, someone had to plunge in after her and, with considerable risk to his own life, save her from drown. big. If ever she rode, either she catle to grief or there was a horse to ,be paid for. If ever she played hockey, either she injured h...
Not a Banquet. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
Not a Banquet, A story Mr. Taft tells Is about a number of old men who, having been schoolboys together, thought it would be an excellent plan to have a New Year banquet together In memory of old times. The most enthusiastic "old boy" among them went to the banquet ex. peeling to have a .pleasant evening talking over schooldays, but he was bitterly disappointed. One man had a troublesome heart, and he would talk of nothing else; another had gout; another had a bad liver; another was worried about his kidneys; another's indigestion mono polised his attention; and so on, each had trouble with eome organ or other. When he returned home somebody asked the enthusiastic man how he had enjoyed the banquet. "Banquet!" he exclaimed bltterly. "It wasn't a banquet, it was an organ recital!" .Mother: Here is the man .for that clock to he repaired. (et it for him. T'ommy: \'here is it? Mother: U1sta'rD, of course. 't'mmy: Oh, I thought. It had run down.
WOMAN'S WORLD. TO KEEP A WIFE HAPPY. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
WOMAN'S WORLD. TO KEEP A WIFE HAPPY, Keep all pre-nuptial promises. Give her a bank account-however small-as well as yourself,I Go into town oftener than once a week. When awqy from home write or telegraph daily, Take her with you on business and pleasure trips, Be more polite to her than to any other woman. Ielaember that she, likes flowers, sweets and books, Don't criticise her hats and dresses. If you have only a shilling you don't waste it when you spend it on her. Be faithful in all things, generous, considerate and loving,
Both Done. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
Both Done. A married couple were frequently in disagreement on the subject of meals, each usually suggesting a dish for the Sunday dinner which the oth. er did not ipprove, One Saturdlay the man came home from market withL a basket. "You needn't worry about to'mor' row's dinner any more, Maria; I've got it." "And so have I, Goorge! ,You were so undecided," "Undecided! I told youI what I wanted," "Well, I mean you didn't decide ais I did. So I bought a goose." "Why, so have II I told you I'd like a goose." "Well, now we are agreed for once, anyhow." "Yes; and I suppose we'll have cold goose and stew for the next fort* night!" They relapsed into their usual ail lence. "Do you want a few cloves in the apple sauce with your goose?" the wife asked on Sunday morning. "Your goose, you mean." "No, I don't! It seemed so absurd to have two geese in the house, that I sent mine to Aunt Jane." "What! Why, I sent mine to Uncle Joe!" To straighten their hats is the first impulse of. feminine human...
BOXING CHILDREN'S EARS. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
BOXING CHILDREN'S EARS. A physiological journal some time ago conde?oned the practice of boxing children's ears, The passage of the ear is closed by a thin membrane, specially adapted to be influenced by every impulse of the air, and with nothing but the air to support it in ternally, If anyone designed to break or overstretch the membrane, he could Ecarcely devise a more effective means than to bring the hand sudden. ly and forcibly down upon the pass age of the ear, thus driving the air violently before it, with no possibility for its escape but by the membrane giving way. Many children are made deaf by this practice.
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
GIRLS' HAIR, The care of a girl's hair during her childhood has much to do with its later beauty. With the exception of an occasional clipping or singeing of the ends where a tendency to split is noticeable, the growth of the hair should not be interfered with. The old idea that It ought to be cut short in childhood is not now entertained, except in special cases, It is unwise to trust the daily comb. Ing of a little girl's hair entirely to the nurse, certainly not without fre quent overlooking. Hasty combing injures the hair by breaking it. It should be carefully brushed out, the hair being separated into strands if it shows a tendency to mat. If the comb, at the end of the operation, has gathered a considerable amount of knots and snarls and long hairs, the method has not ueen proper. It is possible to brush out a tangle of locks and scarcely lose a hair, but It takes care and patience. It is also unwise to wash the hair goo often, as it makes it dry and brit tie. Profuse perspira...
TO GIRLS WHO FAIL TO PLEASE. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
TO GIRLS WHO FAIL TO PLEASE, To girls who, for some undefined reason, fail to please in a general way, though here and there they may gain a friend, an admirer, a lover, and who would like to feel a conscious power to attract a certainty of social success at any time or place, there is this to be said. To begin with, a soft voice and a quiet manner are desirable; sympathy is not easily expressed in boisterous tones or a bustling-mannered demean or. Given these, there are few precepts to remember. Do not. ask a series of deliberate questions, but try to ascertain what subject interests your partner in con versation, and if you know little or nothing of it, be sure that an intelli gent listener is always appreciated. Even the dullest-seeming man, the most raw youth, has some coign of vantage where he feels at home; and if you lead him to talk of this, and you demonstrate the fact that he in terests you, you increase his self-re spect, you convey a pleasant tingle of self-satisfaction,...
TAKE A HOLIDAY. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 23 May 1914
TAKE A HOLIDAY, Run away front home for a few days when there is a good opportun icy. If you are the home-maker, the family will rejoice on your return, and there will be something new to talk about and a wider outlook on life for yourself. The nose that is kept constantly at the grindstone grows sharp.
A GREAT VICTORY. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
A GREAT VICTORY, Two large orchards, side by side, brought much profit to Farmer Lee, and much trouble, for the orchards were considered fair game by the boys of the village, and two orchtrds are harder to watch than one, One day, looking from one orchard to the other, Lee saw a small boy shilt down a tree, and, uttering a word of warning to another imp still up among the apples, ran off, Lee reach, ad that tree in record time. "Got yer this time," he roared to the boy, almost hidden among the leaves. "Come' down!" Getting no answer, and not being in a hurry, he sat down and waited, un til a servant brought him a note that had just been dropped through the letter.box. He did not wait after he had read it, as follows:-? "Some people 'as apples, some 'as sence, You bin watchin' a pair of trousis stuffed with straw, and we bin gettin' your apples from the other orchard. (reat victory for sence,
Father's Dilemma. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
Father's Dilemma. A parent's life is one long responsi bility, It's a wonder that so many of the genus discharge their duties so ac ceptably. A writer has discovered another parental problem; or perhaps he merely calls attention to one which many fathers have discovered for theonselves. "How's the family?" one inquired of a happily married man. "Well, Imy children are at a..dilll cult age now." "Difficult? Why, they've all passed the leasles and Leething stage, have they not?" "Long ago. But you don't know a father's troubles. M.y children are at the age where if I use slang my wife says I'm setting a bad example, and if I speak correctly, the kids think I'm a back number. Which would you do?"
A CHAPTER OF MISFORTUNE. The Story of Charles Tellier, the Inventor of Cold Storage. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
A CHAPTER OF MISFORTUNE. The Story of Charles Tellier, the Inventor of Cold Storage. A modest funeral wending its way through the streets of Paris last Oc. tober carried to his last resting-place the originator of a great modern in dustry, Charles Tellier, like so many inventors, made fortunes for others, while he lived and died in obscurity and comparative poverty, How the idea of cold storage first entered his fertile brain forms a curl. ous anecdote. He called, some fifty years ago, on Baron I-iaussman, the "maker of modern Paris," to submit models of weaving machinery, It was a terribly hot afternoon, and the Pre fect, chatting'pleasantly to the engin eer, laughingly observed, "Better de sign a freezing machine, Now or never is surely the time," The subject gave Tellier food for thought, and a freezing machine he invented. After sundry ups and downs, a lost lawsuit, an imprison. ment for debt, he saw his machine in actual working to produce artificial ice for cafes, etc., and ma...
PAPERHANGING. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
PAPERHANGING. Who undertook, at ma's request, A paperhanging job with zest, And nobly strove to do his best? That's Father. Who, having fixed the first piece flush, He turned his back to get his brush, \Vhat was it came down with a rush? The paper. Who, running down the steps in haste, Fcll head first in a paill of paste, And then complained about the taste? 'Twas Father, Who with the brush the paper tore, And dropped the pieces on the floor, Then stuck a length across the door? Why, Father. Who came and watched him with a frown, And said, "Look here, you silly clown, You've got the pattern upside down?'" 'Twas Mother. Who murmured, as he choked a sob, "A working man I will not rob, We'll get a pro. to do the job?" Poor Father,
Helping the Editor. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
Helping the Editor. A country editor, who Is also an au thority on certain Industrial matters, recently came up to town, bringing his wife along with him. 'This good woman was one after. noon the guest of a rather patronlslng clubwoman. "So your husband is an editor?" the latter asked, "Yes," "Since you' have no family and have considerab'e leisure on your hands, I dare say you assist him in his edi torlal work?" "Oh, yes," said the editor's wife, who is also his cook, "I edit all his inside matter."
Which Leg? [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
Which Leg? In a small town in the West of Scotland the town clerk, who was a bhit of-.a "character," had the mis fortune to lose his leg In a railway ac. oldent. As a mark of appreciation and es. teem for his long services, the coun oil unanimously agreed to replace his loss with an artificial leg, which they did as soon as he was sufficiently re covered. A few months afterwards the town clerk, who was generally known by his Christian name, Paul, was punfor tunate enough to have his other leg fractured in a trap accident. Naturally the mlshap became food for town gossip, and one old wife, in discussing the matter with a neigh bor, was overheard saying "It's a grey bad business for Paul, puir man; but 1s't his ain leg or the leg that belangs to tile toon that's broken?"
His Reason. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
His Reason. "It says here 'One of the idols most revered by the Koreans is the figure of a woman, seated, resting her chin in her hand,'" said Mrs. Chatterley, reading from the newspaper. "Which proves that the Koreans are about the wisest nation on earth," suggested her husband. "How's that, Joshua?" "Well," said Mr. Chatterley, with distinct emphasis, "simply because they make a doeity of a woman who has sense enough to give her chin a rest."
A Neddyfying Move. [Newspaper Article] — Preston Leader — 6 June 1914
A Neddyfying Move. The Mayor's wife was highly elated over her husband's unexpected knight hood, and it was with gratiflcation that she Induced him to consent to their speedy removal to a more classy neighborhood, She at once dispatched a letter to the principal carriers to send, on a certain date, one of their largest fur niture removers, On the day of the removal, how ever, the Mayoress was staggered to see a donkey and cart stop outside the house, "Whatever does this mean?" she demanded of the driver, "I sent for one of your largest vans!" "Be easy, mum," replied the man. soothingly, It's orlright. The big van was bespoke, d'ye see, so the gaf. fer sees to me, ses he, 'Shyfter, you takl eddy, an' do the job in twice, an' I'll only charge the lady for one run.' So 'ere I be, mum. Woa, Neddyl" You can bulld a house, but a home must grow,