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Elephind.com contains 118,866 items from Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The, samples of which are listed below. All items from this newspaper title are freely available and can be searched from the search box above. You may also search the entire collection of 2,949 newspaper titles in Elephind.com.
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ANOTHER OF TOOLE'S JOKES. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

ANOTHER OF TOOLE'S JOKES. Sir Henry Irving tells an amusing story of aj joke that he, with Mr. Toole aud a laird patty.j played some years ago at a Glasgow hotel. After,! their work they were supping at their hotel,' where, suys Sir Heary, 'there was iu thei room a high screen. The instant Ihe wuitcn wus gone we commenced operations. We( Btripped the silver wine, of which thern was a, tolerable supply, from the table, and placed if] behind the screen. We then opened the win-! dow und turnod out the gas, am) Bnally all got; under the table. We had only to remain iu ouil cramped position a few minutes before ivtl heard the unsteady feet of our friend along the' passage. ' The darkened room amazed him, and the* cold air through the window seemed to strike him with affright. ' ' Gnidness,' exclaimed he, ' it's thieves they are. A' thocht as much frae the luiki o' them, aud frae tbeir gay talk, and their lauchter. Eh ? but I'm a ruiued man. A' wish a' had uae taen the hale o' that lusli ...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
BETRAYED BY "X" RAYS. Chapter I. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

BETRAYED BY 'X' RAYS. Chapter I. Ponpon Mortgage, the renowned financier, sat in his sumptuously-furnished office in Park lane thinking bitter hard thoughts. Deep lines furrowed his brow, and his fingers twitched nervously as he turned a letter over and over in his hands, and read acain tha lines therein. ' Never have I tried to thwart my daughter's slightest wisb,' he said at last ; 'but this thing is too serious. Upon it depeuds her whole future happiness. This letter from Reggy Ordinaire tells me thut he loves her, and that she returns his affection. Hah 1 is it so. . Then 1 must, and shall,. cure her of tbis absurd passion. ? Boy ' A youth entered the office and bowed to tho great Huancier. ' Go to this address and tell the Professor to call at my house to-night at eight o'olock and bring a Eumkorff coil and a Crookcs' tube with him.' The youth bowed again and left the office. ' '. ? ' Once more will I save my lortuue by the use of the cathode rays,' muttered the banker. 1 ' Hah...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
A TERRIBLE AWAKENING. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

A TERRIBLE AWAKENING. '..' ^ She looked upon tbe palo slender youth kneel- i ing before her, and was moved to pity Vrtftiliero was tender sympathy in her bearing aS-ut) told him iihe could uuver bo his wife , HeK^SrJlJier - answer with a bowed head. $$*!'!&& ' Hay 1,' he tt8k(d, simply, » p$fpoj?nife to J you one other question before X risVtojoWay 'jp' knees?' '^jO f '?'? Yes.' . I * His glittering eyes were fustencdjipoa' her /** ?face now. - ???* i ''.' Have you' — he wus terribly earnest— ''any1 i corns, bunions or inverted nails.' . . i *;,Bbe shrieki d as it dawned upon her that he- *»» was, after nil. u chiropodist. rVheu h-i strode' , jL\ away for ever tbe mow crushed benuith bill '36» feet with a merry mocking sound. ''*«{ ' -ZTZ ? 1^ ? . W - Scrupulous Vnleb (on fiiuiintr A h-p slnl- {^ ling-piece in the pocket of. iiis mantel V iiO« '||p wnistcout) : It's a,. thousand pates for tlie ' , wuistco.it, but there's liotliiiit; elso foi it I** ' must, muko a lio...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
THE GRATEFUL PATIENT TO HIS NURSE. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

THE GRATEFUL PATIENT TO HIS NUhSE. Une fully enjoys being wracked with diseases. Afflicted with sneezes, And subject to chills ; ' ^ . 5' Be hers but tbe hand that pours oil on one's ._ C spasms, . , Applies catapla»m», * Administers pills. ! Oh I ,-oisonB in general, avoided as frightful, Are simply ncngnciul ; Yes, wormwood and myrrh, \ And alap aud strychnine and raw jaborandi, i Are luscious as c^ndy. If given by her I Oh ! Wbo would uot highly appreciate anguish i And cheerfully languish, ,''*: When Agony smote '* His fiaine on its way through this laahrytua) y valley, %- lf only Miss Sally Were spraying his throat.

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
WHEN POLLY WANTS HER WAY. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

WHEN POLLY WANTS HER WAY. ?« I wish yon wouldn't,' »aid Polly, dolefully. M Wouldn't what p' I asked. ' Wouldn't be an editor and have to work at night.' ' What is it now V 'What is what?' ' What is it you want me to take you to ?' 'Nothing.' A.pause. ' Only the Wheelers aro goiug to have a dance Thursday night, and 1 thought— perhaps ? ' I smoked on. Polly view me in aggrieved silence. ' I wish you would take that horrid cigar out and talk to me.' ' My dear child,' I began. (This is a form of address I invariably use when about to say something disagreeable.) '_? My dear child; I have many times explained to you the impos sibility of my leaving the desk in the evening, even for you. On a paper like ours,' I con tinued, lapsing imo my professional tone, 'with an extensive circulation and a high standard of excellence to maintain ? ' ' Oh, bother the paper,' said Polly. ' You used to do it.' ' True ; once or twice ? * ' Exactly seven timea.' ' Or thereabouts ; I have disregarded my d...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
POPPING THE QUESTION BY TELEPHONE. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

POPPING THE QUESTION BY TELEPHONE. r ' My dear Dick, I'm most heartily sorry for you.' '? Oh, it's all very well to say that, bat sym pathy's cheap.' ' My good chap, excuse my laughing — you're really getting very cross-grained. What mure can I do than express sympathy p' ' You can help if you will. Bob p' ' Believe me, 1 would if 1 could I That isn't the thing one says to a chum as a general thing, because you see when they get married they usually remain a bachelor man's chums ?no longer. But since you're been gone on this blessed — I mean adorable — girl, you've turned yourself into such an utter nuisance that I'd do a good deal to get you off my hands. Why, in wonder, don't you propose to her right off, and and get it done with ?' ' Because I c»n uever find a chance.' ' Bosh 1 Make one ! You meet her often uuuu£ui ? ? uj f mail aiifr;. nil VUC WUllU ariD how fond she is of you.' ' Do you think to, Bub, or are you just humbugging ?' ' HDUfst Injun ! I mean it. Look here, pull you...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
HOW HE RAISED THE WIND. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

HOW HE RAISED THE WIND. Au impecunious and extravagant, but some what clever artist, who felt but few tinges of remorse at any unscrupulous method he em ployed to raise the wind, resorted to a success ful though audacious trick, by means of which he disposed of an unusual number of pictures. An important South Yorkshire tuna with, us may ue exnecceu, a goouiy trine ol purie proud people of great importance in their own estimation, was the scene of his exploits. About a dozen of these local persons were selected »s suitable victims, and of these some atrocious portraits of a most unflattering de Then, by promises uf a liberal commission, our artist secured the co-operation of various dealers in second-band furniture living in con venienlproximity to tbe business bouses or resi dences ot tbe caricatured gentlemen, and the so-called likenesses irtre exhibited for sale in the shop windows. The artist and his fellow conspirators bad not luug tu await developments, for thu wrath and horro...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
A HOPELESS CASE. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

A HOPELESS CASE. He w»s just a common sinner, But he'd buy a tramp a dinner, An' he'd sort o' try to put him ou his feet ; Au' a feller might be needy, Au' his raiment worn and seedy, Yet. he'd stop an' visit with them in the street. He made uo adD about it — Wouldu't br»g around ner shout it, Yet he did a heap to help bis fellow men ; When he'd find a fallen brother Iu some easy way er other, He would make him organise himself again. He had money an' he spent it, Mr he give away er lent it ; Seemed ez if tbe more he loi-&e more he got. Made all sorts of big ? onations. Helped support his poor relations. An' ho bought a orphan school a house an' lot. Never heard o' him a-shoutin' Ner a-settiug 'round a-spoutin' 'Bout the everlastin' wickedness of things ; But he jest went on a-fiudin' Deeds to do, an' never inindin' Much about a crown er harp with golden strings. Yot'the deacon's folks (it's very Hard to say it) they was merry When at last death came an' caught him in the lu...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
SOLD AGAIN ! [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

SOLD AGAIN ! ' Ugh ! ' said tbo Kickupon Indian in a tone of disgust ? ,„„ '? What'-is tho mutter;' Swallowtail ? ' in quirod-th'^pjicr^ . _, ^ ^ : \ ' Big Injun chote whito .slUn * miles. Want .Mttlp. C»&h wbitguBa^). 'Wbitn mail bald.^.Ugh!' ;-«3Tf /

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
SHE RESENTED THE INSULT. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

SHE RESKNTED THE INSULT. ' I couldn't help it, papa.' She looked up into bis face with her frank blue eyes, aud it wus impossible to doubt her. ' But yon didn't seem to be protesting very much,' said tbe old gentleman. ' But it was so suddeu, papa, that I couldn't,' she insisted. ' Tell me about it,' he said. it WhII. Iir adnnted a Vferv nlpvnr rnnu. vn.i see. He got me to look the other way, and then, before I knew it, ho had kissed me on the cheek.' ' The scouudrol !' . '? ' It was wrong of him, of course.' ?' What did you do then ?''??? ' I was very angry. I told him it was an insult.' ' Indeed it was, and you should have ordered him to leave the bouse. Did you ?' ' No— o ; not exactly.' ' Well, what did you do ?' ?? I told him it was an insult, «nd he must take it back.' ' And tbeu ?' ' He was taking it back when you came in and saw him.'

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
Orange Sponge. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

Orange Sponge. Is a delicious sweet, and very easy to prepare. The ingredients required are : — Four eggs, 3oz. fine white sugar, three oranges, the rind of half a lemon, not quite %oz. of gelatine. Beat the yolks half an hour. Then add the gelatine (dissolved in half a teacupful of warm water), the juice of the oranges, and the rind of the lemon grated. Beat the whites of the eggs to a stiff froth, and ntlr them in last of all. Pour Into a glass bowl, and stand In a cool plaoe to set.

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
Egg Jelly. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

? Egg Jelly. Take 1% pints of milk, four well-beaten eggs, and the yolks of three, the rind of a large lemon, sugar to taste, and a pinch of cinnamon. Mix all together in a deep pudding dish, cover it, and stand It over a saucepan of boiling water until the mixture has become quite firm. When cold, strew some sifted sugar over the top, and serve with cherry or any other preserve. '

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
The Table. Mushrooms. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

The Table. Mushrooms. There are many ways of preparing this dainty, and I have selected two or three of the most simple methods suit able to the average table. The usual way, and very delicious, it Is too, Is to cut off the stalks, and wipe the mush rooms very carefully with a soft cloth. Put them Into a dish with a small piece of butter on each, and a sprinkling of salt and pepper over all. Cover with another dish and let them cook in their own juice, either on the back of the stove or in the oven, if the latter is not too hot. Another way Is to cut off the stalks, as before, and peel the mush rooms. Then put them, underside upper most, into a strong pledlsh ; pour In a little oil, add a seasoning of salt, pepper, sweet herbs, and powdered mace. Cover closely, and put Into a fairly hot oven. When quite tender, they are done.

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
Mushrooms and Tomatoes. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

Mushrooms and Tomatoes. Oil a little butter in stewpan, and into it place four tomatoes cut into thin slices ; shake over the fire for a minute, and then add your mushrooms, well picked and cleaned. Add a little minced parsley and a tiny piece of garlic, dredge in some flour, and then add enough good brown gravy to cover. Let all stew very gently, without boiling, for an hour, take the mushrooms and tomatoes up, thicken the gravy, and pour over.

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
The Spanish Peasantry. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

The Spanish Peasantry; ' In Spain, a century behind the rest of the world, machinery 'has not been! in troduced ; evei-ything Is done by manual labour. The tillers of 'the soil often' liaveto go long distances to their work. Cottages are few and far between ; tho piuuis arc iiu-reacuing. xney start before daybreak, and return after night fall. Tired with their long day, they make a frugal meal, and then to bed. Of home they really see nothing except ing ;on Sunday, their only day of rest and leisure. Very picturesque they look, standing in groups about the vil lages, dressed in the long cloak that often sits upon thorn as gracefully as upon the noble. Most of the people work in tho fields, men, women, and children ; and not infrequently over work tiisiuselves into ill-health and shortened lives. All are simple and pri mitive, happy as people living under a warm sun and generous climate gene U-ally are. Wisdom has taught them not to expect tne impossible, and they are easily contente...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
The Rebaptising of a Mountain. A Curious Story. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

The Relmptising of a Mountain. A Curious Story. ' Diable'rets ! That is rather a grim name fora mountain. What Is the ori gin of it?' was another of our ques'-. tioris. For answer wo had a curious story enough. In 1714 the whole valley was affrighted .by strange unearthly noises proceeding, as it seemed, from priests told tho people that a war had broken put in tho infernal regions, and that a pitched battle was going on be tween legions of demons imprisoned under the rocks. Then It was that the mountain was rebaptised with Its present uncanny name. Later in the year the solution of the mystery., came in the shape of an enormous landslip, of which: the internal rumblings had been the; warning, which rent the whole moun tain, as it were, in twain, one-half. roll- ing away, from the other, aod blotting out all the old features of the country. Numbers of people arid multitudes of cattle perished. -V The: most' extraordi nary part of ? the ??businoss, however, consisted !in vtheireappoa...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
The Barber's Revenge. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

The Barber's Revenge. As he threw nlmseii drck into cne em brace of the cushioned chair of a union square bnrber shop he scowled fiercely at the barber and buried his face in the newspaper. But the barber didn't mind the ugly opening-. He loaned over, garroted the tonsorial patient with a towel, and painted his face with lather., When he had flipflapped a razor once or twice along the strop he began mildly: ' Nice day, sir.' ' un, is iff answered the other. The barber looked startled, but he tried again. ' Paper says we aj-e going to have nice weather now.'. ' Thanka,', was the answei-, ' I know'^owytp r«!ad At this rebuff the bnrbeV kept silence. Out he shaved against the erafn, tweak ed the other's nose, and daubed soap1 Into the corner of his mouth. - The graft man swore softly, the barber smiled, and, as a final act of violence, grabbed the other by the top of the Bcalp and twlBted his head until the. cervical ver tebrae croaked again. 'Say',' cried the gruff man, 'my head ain't...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
Why I Hate Women. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

tflty I Oa(c Women. A correspondent, whose sex we de cline to divulge, sends us the following twenty-one answers to the above ques tion:— j 1. Because she stabs me in the eye with her parasol, offers no apology, and looks as if I did it. 2. Because shei pushes for a place fn trains and omnibuses, and. belnir in. never makes any room for other people. 3. Because, in public, her prattle is audible and unceasing, and includes the biographies and characteristics of all her friends by nnmo. 4. Because she discusses frocks with her sister opposite, and describes fabrics and fixings as if at her dressmaker's. 5. Because she climbs to the tops of omnibuses, to descend from which de mands grace and decency. G. Because she thinks the only way to make an omnibus stop is to prod the driver, if she cannot reach the conduc tor. 7. Because, being of the class for whom omnibuses are not, she spoils her coach man, and ruins her horses, by her ig norant or inconsiderate use of them. 8. Because, being...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
Sago Shaoo. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

'. ? . Sago Shane. ? Take %lb. of white sago, six large eggs, '4,1b. of white sugar, Moz. gelatine dis solved in hot water, the rind of a lemon, and cinnamon to taste. Wash the sago in several waters, boiMt slowly with the lemon rind, stick cinnamon, and milk. Then stir In the gelatine, remove the aa.Ln;ey;tii irum me Tire, acia the yollcs of the eggs, and the whites beaten to a stiff froth. Pour Into a wet mould. When. quite cold turn out, and serve with a fruit sauce. In making this pudding be careful to let the sago boil suffi ciently.

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
The Value of a Wife. [Newspaper Article] — The Gundagai Independent and Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate — 9 November 1898

The Value of a Wife. The degraded position of a woman In China is well known. Nothing aston ishes the Chinamen who visit our' mer- chants at Hongkong so much as tho de ference which is paid by our country men to ladies, and the position, whicli the lutter'are nermiHwl t-n:i'ini-i..in:.Vnntn_ ty. The very servants express their disgust at seeing our ladies permitted to sit at table with their lords, and won der how moil can so far forget 'their dignity. ? . . A young English merchant' took his youthful wife with him to Hong kong, where the couple '' wore visited by a wealthy manda rin. The Inlljr regarded tlie lady attentively, and soeniod to dwell .with delight on her movements. When- she at' length left tlie apartment he said lo the husband In his imperfect Engtfsh : 'What 'you give for that wifeywife yours ?'.' ' ^,/,l|.V ? ' Oh,' replied the 'husband, laughing at -the singular error of hisi'uKtsitor, ' three thousand pounds.' - , ' -_4 Tills our.,nierchant thought would ap near t...

Publication Title: Gundagai Independent And Pastoral, Agricultural & Mining Advocate, The
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: NSW, Australia
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