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Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Po... Delete search filter
Elephind.com contains 14,950 items from Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser, samples of which are listed below. All items from this newspaper title are freely available and can be searched from the search box above. You may also search the entire collection of 2,949 newspaper titles in Elephind.com.
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Umbrella Tricks. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

Umbrella Tricks. Irate Customer.-" Look here, I bought this compactum umbrella at your shop yes terday. "You guaranteed that it. would re main small and tidy; and now look at it; I can't fold it up into double' its original size." Shopkeeper (blandly, as he inspects the article).-" I am sure I am very sorry ; and I cannot account for it, unless-horrified why, my dear sir, you have been using it !'

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
He Made Them Run. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

He Made Them Run. "Policemen !" exclaimed young Carver, the medical student," I don't care for any number of policemen ! Why, it was only last night I made three of them run for nearly half a mile," and then he looked round for. applause. " It .is qiite true, gentlemen," observed his friend Bolus; " I saw the chase, but Carver has forgotten to mention that the policemen were running after him."

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
The Way of It. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

The Way of It. Patient-" I say, doctor, how' much beer would it take to support a man ?" Doctor-" A pint a day is quite sufficient. If a man drinks more than that, he has to support the beer." Patient-" That accounts, then,. for a fellow getting weak about the knees when he's had too much; it is more than he can support." ,

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
The Little Cherub. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

The Little Oherub. SHE (addressing first baby). The exquisite little cherub ! I love him like myself ; I would neither sell nor change him For twice his weight in pelf. JIE (to himself). He cries and howls the, whole night through, Except when he is sick; To nurse him is my wretched fate- / I'd sell him, jolly quick. SHE. He's the dearest little angel, The sweetest little pet, That ever human eyes beheld That ever was seen yet. .. -Ifhe's such a perfee? angel,' ' Why, all I've got to say Is, I wish he'd stay'd in Heaven, Or now would fly away. .

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
A Life Sentence. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

A-Life Sentence. JACK-" Hullo, old feller; haven't seen you since we left school; aii't married yet, Isuppose ?" TOM-" Yes, I am." JACK-" Are, el? How many yJears ha7ve yri, done ?P'

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
How Sculptors Work FACTS NOT GENERALLY KNOWN ABOUT STATUE MAKING—VARIOUS METHODS OF CARVING—THE MEN WHO HELP THE SCULPTORS. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

How Sculptors Work. FACTS NOT GENERALLY KNOWN ABOUT "STATUE MAKING-VARIOUS METHODS OF. CARVING THE MEN WHO HELP THE SCULPTORS' Several great sculptors, Michael Angelo among them, have, occasionally hewn their statues 'straight out of the block of maible, without going through the preliminary courses of modeling in clay "and casting in plaster. But this is rarely done, for, in the 'first place, the work would be too long for any artist who has a regard for his time, and, in the second, the hewing.of the marble demands a special, practical experience which makes it an art apart. A sculptor would probably, spoil ahun Idred blocks of marble before making as much as a statuette a foot high, where he to trust only himself in the matter. Even Michael Angelo, when he tried to dispense with the "statuary," or "practitioner," succeded only min making fragments of figures. Not being an adept in judging of the size of the block he needed, he was constantly finding that he had miscalculated, and...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
For the Ladies [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

Flowers are again beginning to look scarce in our gardens, and perhaps a method of pre- I serving a bouquet for a long time may be an t acceptable item to our readers. A vessel, t filled with water and sufficiently large to allow the submersion in it of the vase or plate hold ing the bouquet, and a bell-glass to cover the latter, are all that is required. If a plate is preferred, the flowers should have a weighted base previously attached to them to.keep them in an upright position. The bell-glass- should have its rim fitted exactly to the flat part of the plate ; the former must be quite filled with water and without the slightest air-bubble. All three are then raised together and care fully wiped on the exterior, but leaving round the edge of the bell-glass a little water to ex elude the air. It will be found that bouquets can be kept in this manner for many weeks and yet preserve all their beauty and freshness. The former is enhanced by numerous gas bub bles produced by the respi...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
She Couldn't Know. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

She Couldn't Know. .:Lady-" Shut your mouth, Bridget. You are the most impertinent servant I ever had. You always. want to have the last word."' Bridget-" Sure, and that's not my fault. How can I know- beforehand whin yez air going to quit answering me back ?"

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
THE SOLEMN HALF-HOUR. THE PET LAMB. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

THE SOLEMN HALF-HOUR. BY SILAS INELL, .THE PET LAMB. How pleasant it is to loll. in the shade of a blossoming wattle tree,, and watch the merry lambkins frisking on the hill side of some verdant woodland pasturage. How joyously the snowy little sprites gambol round their dams, going on. to their knees, ever and anon, to attack the maternal dug. Blithesome innocents I Who would think that they could grow up to butt a dignified, corpulent, old gentleman in the vest, second button from the bottom, and layhim out, shut together like a clasp-knife. We once-thought that the pet lamb, with fleece as white as snow, was a clinging, play. ful creature, affectionate and gentle-oh, so gentle I We had read that such was the case in numerous poems. by reliable authorities; but, after due consideration, and associating with a tame young sheep for a spell or two, We have seen fit to go back on those opinions and sentiments; we have concluded to - .: - - . change our minds ; and now, when a lanky ba...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
Her George. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

Her George. "George I When you get through teasing that beautiful dog and regain your senses I have something to say." George had been trying the tail of the pup in an elegant bow of old-gold ribbon, and was getting ready the tape and the sealing wax to stamp his wife's initials on.the knot, in accordance with his view ' of the latest fashion. .. . : "George 1" Do you hear me ? George, I want an ice-chest." "A what, my dear ?" "An ice-chest." "What for?" " Not to keep you in, although I think I'll have to put ice on your head presently. For meat." "Dog's meat ?" S"No. Not dog's meat. Fool's meat. I'm going to get an ice-chest, and I'm going to keep a whole lamb in it at a time." "All right. Tell me when you want the lamb." Several days after he ordered a lamb at her request, and had it carefully dismem bered and sent home. The ice-chest was ready. When he got off the 'bus in the even ing, he went around the house looking for that ice-chest. She met him. " What are you looking for 2"...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
A Question for Mathematicians. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

A.Question for Mathematicians. It is a question for the mathematicians to solve how much time two women save who risk their lives running across the street in front of an omnibus, and then have to stand and-wait for the other woman who was afraid to run.

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
Taking His Life. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

Takin.g His Life. A life insurance agent, Benjamin P. Gunn, was over at Williamstown the other day, and while there he heard that old Mr. Bromley had no insurance upon his life, so Gunn con. eluded to drop in and'see him. Bromley, had no "acquaintance with Gunn, and when the latter,. entered the office he introduced himself by saying : " Mr. Bromley, I called to see if I could take your life." "Wh-wh-what d'you say?" exclaimed Bromley, in some alarm. "I say that I've come round to take your life. My name is Gunn. As soon as I heard you were unprotected-that you had nothing on your life=-I thought I would just come and settle the thing with you at once." Then Bromley got up and went to the other side of the table, and said to himself : "By George, it's a lunatic who has broken out of the asylum. He'll kill me if I holler or run. , I must humor him." Then Gunn, fumbling in his pocket after..: the inortality tables, followed Bromley. around- the room and said to him: S"-You can choose ...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
His Reasons Were Good. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

His Reasons Were Good. An Episcopalian ministeri in a country; town was speaking.of 'a certain young man in the place. " No," said the divine, "I] don't like him. He is a low, worthless fellow, and I don't want anything to do with him uider any circumstances," " My dear," interposed his wife, "it isn't right to talk that way about anyone. The boy is young yet and may reform." " No, he never will." "But you mustn't be so severe on1 him. If you would try you might possibly help him to be something better.' "TI shall never try. If he should come into my church I would consider it my -duty to order him out.". "Don't-talk that Way I What has he done to cause you. to have such un christian feelings against him ?" " What has he done ? Well, he's done enough. He's got a trick of making a noise like two dogs fighting, and for the last two Sabbaths he's got under the church windows and stampeded the whole congregation. I tell you it would make you have unchristian feelings to see your congreg...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
Advertising [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

0 Any description of Genera Printing executed n First-class Styl?ith Quick Dspch, and or erate rice, at the Office of ?? . S~ this Newspaper In the Advertiuing Department every effort is made to satisfy customers-Speoial Inducements for Large Advertisements, and Low Quotatious iw all.

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
Wit and Humor [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

Every miser should have a chest protector. The greatest wag ever-known.-A woman's tongue. Doctors say that diseases can be communi cated by kissing. " Love, for instance. ' A cyclone is like three shcool-girls walking abreast-it don't turn aside for anything.., A woman kicked a dog to death a few days ago, and now her husband never con tradicts anything she says. Talking is said to be conducive to longe vity. Silence kills some women. It is the lack of silence which finishes the men. . A parson's little daughter, on visiting another vicarage, -asked :, "What does your pa want a study for ? He doesn't smoke." Daughter-" Mamma, I'm crazy about this palmistry." Mother-" The pa mystery Im crazy about is where your father spends his evenings." " Were you ever engaged in a duel,- Col.,. Blood?' " "Yes, sah; I was, sah." " Did it. terminate seriously ?" ... Yes, sah; I ýwas . arrested and fined £10, sah." ._ : " You can -alwaysi:tell a bachelor by the,' way he handles a :baby," says an exc...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
People Will Hint. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

People Will Hint. The practical hint is always rude and broad. When the commander of a ship of war Wishes .:-a weaker vessel to stop and be searched, or spoken to, and finds her evasive, shy, or "wilful, as weaker vessels sometimes are, he fires a shot across her bows, and if that does not bring her to, sends another whizzing amongst her masts or spars. Again, when they are desirous of threading their way through the obstacles, natural and artificial, which bar the entrance to an enemy's har bour in war time, they delight in catching a native pilot, placing him at the helm, and standing by him with the muzzle of a cocked pistol held within a foot of his ear. And on these occasions it is never found necessary to. speak to the man at the wheel. The hint is all sufficient. Then there is the sporting hint. This is mostly professional, and is communicated to the public at large through the medium of thle newspapers. But there are also private individuals who delight in taking their frien...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
With His Toes Turned In. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

I. With His Toes Turned In. He used to sit with his toes turned in At the couitry school in'the corner seat, When the sun shone down on his thoughtful face. And merrily danced on those awful feet. Biit she had her place by the teacher's desk, . 'way from the scholars' noise and din, ' 'And she'd laugh'till her blue eyes'filled with tears - At the chap who sat with his toes turned in. And he stood at the head of the second class, Where the blue-eyed girl had always been; She'd "rather stand at the foot," she said, " Than stand at the head with her toes turnedin." 'Twas his only fault, the-teacher said; His lessons by pages he'd repeat, And he'd frown at the girl with the curly head When he'd catch her eyes on his inward eet And she grew into a maiden tall, 'I'Though her curls were as golden and her - eyes as blue; And she went off from the country school 'And grew to be rich and famous, too.. For thiey drifted apartonhe of life been, :. . -And the footprints he made on the sands of t...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
The Sentinel. SATURDAY, MARCH 19th, 1887. [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 19 March 1887

TSATI E aDA Y. :`1 ROQ.i1 ,ill 1,7/1 Thu present rate 'fr " trip rond I t. bay iscertainly reasonaile eitiighI foi: a single iman, but when p-iatefarnilias thinks of enjovin? hinimself;,.the outirig is sure .to cost hini: nearly a sovereign hence tihe fare to the latter is 1nop: so veiy cheap after all In couise ofktime have to pay so much for their tickets as the wealthier single men. If there is one tax more tlhin another which we particularly advocate, not for our selves but for our country, it is a bachclor's tax. They form the sour. grapes in the enforced existence of our spinsters, and for this reason alone, they should be taxed, and thlat heavily. As compared with mai'ried men, they aie about as much good to this; the land of their adoption, as Chinamen. The channels' of Government employ= ment should be open to married men. in preference t?o single, say with the odds of 3 to 1. Bachelors are semper fidelis to No. 1. They do tLe State no service, and unjustly participate in t...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
Scientific Notes [Newspaper Article] — Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser — 26 March 1887

Jet, Sir J: Wm. Dawson says, is bitumin ized pine wood. According to Prof..J. Norman Lockyer, the English astronomer, the total number of stars of which some knowledge can be gained with the optical aid now available is from 40,000,000 to 50,000,000. , Carefully made experiments at the Uni versity of Pennsylvania, conducted by Prof. Barker, have shown that some of Mir. Muy bridge's photographic exposures were made in periods of time varying from the one two thousandth to the one five-thousandth of a second. An order has been issued in Lower Austria forbidding manufacturers and tradesmen to sell nickel-plated cooking vessels. It is stated that vinegar and other. acid sub-. stances dissolve nickel.; and that this, in. proportion of one-seventh of a grain, causes vomiting, and is even more poisonous: than copper. Cocaine has a rival in an alkaloid obtained in Australia from the juice of EBuhorbia Drummondii, which Dr. John Reed, its dis coverer, calls drumine. The new local anes thetic...

Publication Title: Queenscliff Sentinel, Drysdale, Portarlington & Sorrento Advertiser
Source: Trove [National Library of Australia]
Country/State of Publication: Vic, Australia
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